Because I am. But I think I need to do it soon since I've been on HRT for almost 6 months & changes are becoming apparent to others. I'm tired of the awkwardness when I need to show my ID at a bar or when I call the bank or my credit card company & have to give my name, because they always get confused since I don't sound male. Only 2 people I know actually call me by the female name I've chosen, then when I'm home or at work I get referred to with my male name & it's starting to bug me I think.  I should be excited to do it but I'm just really scared, I've still not officially told my family I'm transitioning & work doesn't know either. I thought of first changing my Facebook name to my new name so people can just find out themselves but I've still not done it. I'm scared how some people who know me are gonna treat me when they find out. The process of it too seems really complicated, at least here in Philly, & I am not looking forward to it.

If that is you in your avatar, I can't believe people would not know you are a woman. Just saying.

I personally have not changed my name either but, I am really looking forward to it. I too really dislike people calling me my male name, and don't like to show my ID. I know this can be a scary step, but I think it is also an important one. It is just one step closer for you to finally become the real you. You might want to let your work know what is going on before you change your name so it is not a huge surprise. From the time I have spent in Philly, it can be a rather scary place. I hope things go well for you.

Changing your Facebook name can do, I guess, for some more distant people who don't know and who you can't be bothered to contact individually, but I think a proper, more personal coming-out would be necessary to be nice to anyone remotely close to you. In person, as a letter, as an e-mail, your choice, but just learning as a public declaration can make them feel betrayed, like they're not any more important to you than the rest of the world.

Quote from: Brooke777 on October 23, 2012, 07:47:39 PM
If that is you in your avatar, I can't believe people would not know you are a woman. Just saying.

I personally have not changed my name either but, I am really looking forward to it. I too really dislike people calling me my male name, and don't like to show my ID. I know this can be a scary step, but I think it is also an important one. It is just one step closer for you to finally become the real you. You might want to let your work know what is going on before you change your name so it is not a huge surprise. From the time I have spent in Philly, it can be a rather scary place. I hope things go well for you.

Heh, Philly is scary at times & living here does make my transitioning a little harder I think. But for the most part it's a great city with really great resources. I work in fashion retail & the company is supportive of LGBT rights, there's also many gay employees there including the General Manager so I think that will work in my favor but I can't be too sure. I've met gay people who did not like trans people. I do plan on talking to one of my managers there that I really get along with, hopefully this week.

Quote from: PrettySoldier on October 23, 2012, 08:02:50 PM
Heh, Philly is scary at times & living here does make my transitioning a little harder I think. But for the most part it's a great city with really great resources. I work in fashion retail & the company is supportive of LGBT rights, there's also many gay employees there including the General Manager so I think that will work in my favor but I can't be too sure. I've met gay people who did not like trans people. I do plan on talking to one of my managers there that I really get along with, hopefully this week.

I really hope things work out for you. It sounds like you are with a really good company. I work for the utility industry, and they are very conservative. So far, they have had no issues with me coming out to them. I think things will go over just fine for you. Especially being in the fashion industry.
As far as Philly goes, I was near the central part of Philly, not quite downtown. A little outside of the nice businesses. It wasn't as bad as some places I have been. I only saw a couple of shootings.

Quote from: A on October 23, 2012, 07:53:20 PM
Changing your Facebook name can do, I guess, for some more distant people who don't know and who you can't be bothered to contact individually, but I think a proper, more personal coming-out would be necessary to be nice to anyone remotely close to you. In person, as a letter, as an e-mail, your choice, but just learning as a public declaration can make them feel betrayed, like they're not any more important to you than the rest of the world.

I definitely did not think of it that way & this seems like the best method of going about it. Thank you.   

At first, I was a bit shy to reveal my name, even though I had it in my mind. I encountered several people, mostly lesbians (they outed themselves to me later) who asked me "Are you...changing?"

"Why, yes. Yes, I am. etc etc..."

*excited voice* What's your new name gonna be?!"

"Beth...Beth Andrea _____."

"Wow!! That's so cool! Are you gonna get the surgery?? Best of luck to you! etc..."

About the 10th person to ask me, I suddenly felt "ready" for work to know. I went in, told the boss, got a new name tag and an appointment with HR. I also started showing my friends at work (and some random co-workers) my new name tag. They accepted it without too much fuss.

It was only a couple weeks later that I got the ball rolling for the legal name change...here in WA it's a simple process--pay the court clerk, get a court date, wait in court until your (old) name is called, the judge asks three questions (two required by law, the third was, "Is this how you want to spell your new name? Be sure, because it will be this after I sign the paper.")...and then it is signed.

Hey Presto! I am Beth...morally, ethically, spiritually, physically, positively, absolutely,  undeniably, and reliably BETH!

Yay for me! And I ain't never going back!

I wouldn't say I was scared to change my name but I did put it off becasue it would be a pain having a female name before I can go full time, unfortunately I didn't have much choice.
When I was at the gender clinic last year I explained that I couldn't wear make-up all the time to cover my 5 O'clock shadow because of my skin so wouldn't be able to start RLE until my electrolosys was done, however i'd been advised that electrolosys is more effective once you're on HRT.

The psychiatrist was understanding about this medical problem getting in the way, he said that as i'd told my co-workers, friends & family the RLE wasn't as important because they consider telling people to be one of the biggest & hardest social steps.
He did say that I should get my name legaly changed before my next appointment which is in  about 2 weeks BIG YAY   

When the paperwork arrived I cried with happiness as I read the decleration one of the parts that really brings a lump to my throat is this
"I absolutely & entirely renounce, relinquish & abandon the use of my former title of Mr & assume, adopt & determine to take the title of Miss"
(I shortened the last bit but you get the gist of it)
Even reading that now makes me so very, very happy. I think that i'll have a copy framed so anytime I feel down I can read that and smile.

I'm not even sure if I will change my name.

... but I'm not afraid of doing so. I just hope everyone will be okay with the name I pick.

The only fear I had in doing it was wondering if I ever needed to go back to a boy for anything.

I told the people that were most important to me 1 on 1. After that, I went on FB and updated my profile pic to this:



Then I started changing my name. It took about a week to get the court order in the mail. When I finally got that, I sent off for my birth certificate. That's when I changed my name on Facebook. I got 1 silly comment on a post about it but that person is still my friend on there. The ones that unfriended me over it don't deserve my friendship anyways. It's been OVERWHELMING support coming out on FB, though. Most of my friends were made in the bible belt too!

When you are true to yourself and fine with who you are, that's what makes people know that you aren't to be messed with about it. When you're confident, they wont even bother tearing you down. People like easy targets, and easy targets in our community are the reclusive girls / men that are too afraid to stand up and say "I AM WHO I AM!"

I so looked forward to changing my name.  After it was changed I knew there was no turning back or detransitioning.  Some people knew what my name was going to be changed to and some even slipped and called me by it before I even went full time.

Changed mine personally and professionally a month or so ago. I'm an academic so I was frightened of losing links to my track record, so I feminised my firt name to a female version that kept the initial, Cindy is my middle name and I have kept my family name. Lots of forms. No problems from anyone.

One advantage is many of the official people changing my name of licences etc asked what title I wanted Mrs or Ms. I went with Ms. And in every case they said I've also changed your gender marker to female. Which is not officially sanctioned but Hey I ain't going to complain.

Credit cards, bank statements, employment records, email (work) addresses, all changed no problems, no issues. No one has as much batted an eyelid.

I do get asked do you prefer Prof name, or Cindy? I say I don't mind either, my friends call me Cindy, professionally I use XXXX.

Cindy

Here it is just a matter of fronting up to the Births,Deaths and Marriages Registry, filling out the form, and handing over your old Birth Certificate and $88, and wait a couple of weeks. As long as you are not a criminal seeking to hide, it is not obscene and you don't do it more than once a year no problem.  Most hassle was getting around and changing it everywhere else, Driver's Licence etc.

I came out to my immediate family face-to-face and it went well, because they knew I was suffering somehow, and I think they were relieved it wasn't a fatal illness or similar. 

I came out to people I had worked with up until the previous week, (left to go back to study and before the pending Privatisation) by a letter hand delivered to where I worked, and face to face with the few staff who were on that morning. 
The rest I contacted  via a copy of my letter as a personal message on FaceBook, as some of them had moved interstate.
I have to say I did not get one negative reaction, which was a blessing.

Hope it goes as well for you.

Karen.

I could not wait to change mine. I popped into the local courthouse, filled out a Statutory Declaration, declared it in front of the judge and had it signed off. It was the fastest way to get it done.

For me it was big milestone in my way, true begining
After I finally chose my name, I asked at work if it will be fine to be girl, they just  and say ok, just continue working
So a go to therapist for letter and from 1st October I'm Andrea    (still waiting to print new IDs but have birth certifacate)

Quote from: Medusa on October 24, 2012, 06:10:47 AM
So a go to therapist for letter and from 1st October I'm Andrea   

Congratulations!!

My "new birthday" is the first day of summer - 21st June.

for me i just walked in their like i was owed my name change and felt it was no big deal. i guess it worked because the judge was like ok after 3 questions

My name change process wasn't that difficult from a legal perspective. Filed with the courts, filed the legal notice in the newspaper for three weeks, walked into court and answered five questions and that was it.

I had more difficulty with family than anything else (especially when they found out I was changing my surname). I didn't budge one inch on anything, though. I told them all if they had a problem with it I would just sever ties with them and go on my way. Once they saw I was dead serious, things began to slowly change around.

I was scared. But then after a few days of putting my first E patch on. I went straight to the courthouse and filed the papers, then changed my name on Facebook and said  "this is whats happening peeps, deal or go"    I got alot of O_O remarks and nothing else really happened. With the new EEOC laws, my work didnt give me alot of problems either.  I walked into work, told them what was up, told them my soon to be new name, some info on ->-bleeped-<- to help answer their curiosities, and a copy of the EEOC and sex disc laws.

I personally couldnt pick a good name so I had a good friend pick Jacqueline for me. When I first heard it I liked it so much that I adopted it then and there. It just happened to also have the same initial as my first name. lol. As for Rose... I always wear rose oil instead of perfume because I love the smell. I told my roomates first, one was supportive even though she and I had only been friends and living together for a month, the other had been my friend and roomate for years but he couldnt wrap his head around it at first. He came to accept me in a few days and didnt mind me dressing up. I told my family as soon as I was sure. (a few weeks later after putting myself through some tough questions) They still dont fully accept me even though im living with them again. I didnt have a facebook until recently (no computer) so i was able to set myself up as a female.
(dont ask to be my friend though, nothing personal against you wonderfull people! I just dont friend people unless i meet them in person first. You have to be safe.)

Prettysoldier: wow... you are beautiful, so if people around you dont know, they are blind. I wish you only the best though!

Jayne: Congratulations! go you hun!