Quote from: Renae.Lupini on May 25, 2007, 02:07:02 PM
The way the original questions were phrased it was as if from YOUR point of view. We now know they aren't but the validity of our comments still remains to the scenario. If you are looking for supporting information that her marriage is going to fail then you have found it. If she lives in a repressed state then her life will be hell. Even if we take *you* out of the equation, the same logic is applied.

I am not looking for validation of any thought that her marriage will fail..I am more looking for real answers to real questions from a myriad of people to see how varied the answers would be. Unfortunately I see for the most part they are not varied at all.
In loving Brooke I wish the best for her and the best doesn't necessarily mean me and I do not feel it is a competition. Her wife is not only a beautiful woman aestectically she is a lovely human being with a big heart as well. I wish no bad upon her.
I was tossing out scenarios looking for feedback, and I got it  thanks!

you betcha 

Quote from: togetherwecan on May 25, 2007, 02:27:34 PM
In loving Brooke I wish the best for her and the best doesn't necessarily mean me and I do not feel it is a competition.

An that my dear is true beauty.


Ok fine so I am probably a bit biased (I am in the same situation, in a fashion), but um, yeah.

Just thought I would say that.

Sand in the wind

Quote from: Kimberly on May 25, 2007, 03:41:09 PM

Quote from: togetherwecan on May 25, 2007, 02:27:34 PM
In loving Brooke I wish the best for her and the best doesn't necessarily mean me and I do not feel it is a competition.

An that my dear is true beauty.


Ok fine so I am probably a bit biased (I am in the same situation, in a fashion), but um, yeah.

Just thought I would say that.

Sand in the wind

thank you

Quote from: togetherwecan on May 17, 2007, 11:59:20 AM
Ok I am going to open a big old can of worms here...

What if a spouse is accepting in the sense they still love you and want to remain in the marriage, but they are unable to fully grasp TS and all it entails?

Of course, you can continue to educate her (I'm assuming wife... I know, could be hubby too) and hope that she takes to it well, and only accepts you more and more over time...

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What if a spouse is willing to live with you and TS so long as it all remains *in the closet* so to speak?

Sorry, but that would make me completely miserable... even if I loved the person, I'd rather let them go to be with someone else and be happy before trying to hide myself like some "dirty little secret."

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What if a spouse is willing to deal with you dressing incl make up etc in the privacy of your home or on occasions out of the town you live in, but specifically does not want you to transition or take hormones to progress change let alone any potential SRS?

See ya 'round... my decision to transition was made long ago and even f it took me years to be able to come out and fully accept it, I made my decision and no one will dissuade me from accomplishing this goal. The one I love would simply have to understand that this IS who I am, no surgery would change WHO I am, so they love me for me and support my decision, or get going. Being TS causes enough pain without people trying to suppress you for being so...

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What if a spouse cannot deal with their own sexuality wrt your TS and what it makes them, yet still wants to remain in the marriage?

This means that they simply haven't accepted you for who you are yet... they can't accept you for your real gender, or not just yet anyway. Tough issue...

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How much can a person with TS compromise and give up for the sake of the spouse? And, are the compromises healthy in the end for the person that is TS?

Bottom line is, the more you give up, the mor you will hurt yourself and the more of yourself you will lose.... It's just like bottling up emotions, you may be one tough cookie, you may be able to do it for a while, but eventually you will crack, and it will be major... typically a very very bad thing...

amen sister!