a post i read got me thinking how many people have broken up with their significant other because of their friends or relatives didnt aprove because of your trans status. its the reason why one of my few relationships didnt work, so does this happen to anyone else?

Well, I've never had much luck in the relationship department,
But I'm pretty sure that being trans has made it even harder to start up a relationship.
No one seems to be even remotely interested. Oh well. Life goes on.

If I started seeing someone who was close with their friends/family and they did not approve of me, then yes I would end it. It would be cruel to continue the relationship with them as it would cause them to choose between me and their friends/family.

This is an irksome part about potential relationships. I can't expect my partner NOT to tell her family or friends, although I wish they wouldn't feel the need to. Maybe as trans people we're supposed to accept that they have to tell them...? I don't even know man. If it were up to me it wouldn't be necessary for the person you're dating's parents to know you have different-from-expected genitals. But maybe that's not how things work out. I've only had one serious relationship, and her parents knew, but they were family friends to begin with. They were very accepting, to the point where they forgot I was FAAB sometimes. But when they didn't, that acceptance got to be overly much at times. My gf was seeing a doctor and he asked if she could be pregnant. Both gf and her mom when retelling this story were just like "Haw haw, no we don't have to worry about that happening, haw haw" and noting how the doctor seemed to be so confused and what a laugh riot it all was...

My partner and I are in our 12th year together.

I started my transition two years ago and have been on hormones for about a year now.

We are still together but it took work.  We spent eight months in counseling before she was ready for me to start medically transitioning.  She hasn't told her family but she's not close to them.  It took her a while to tell her friends --- months after I had come out. 

It takes work but it can be done.  She is very supportive of me getting top surgery -- I have some medical issues preventing me at the moment but she has  been very helpful in helping me get them under control so I am eligible for surgery.  We already have the money in place and she is excited.  She wants me to be happy.

It is possible to find supportive partners. I'm dating someone who is VERY supportive and wants me to be happy. She supports me taking HRT and getting surgery. Granted, we met after I started my medical transition. It depends on the person you're with, but it's not impossible because someone is trans.

I had never experience so for anyone I been with, I had a couple of friendship I ended because the person wasn't able to deal with the whole trans-thing.

however, usunally I do feel being trans makes me not even want to start being with people in the first place.
I feel like it's a risk to take to be rejected for being trans, even if he/she dosen't rejejct me I feel guilty and less worthy and I feel like I should love him/her more because there willing to accept that part of me,
and even if we do love each other i'm all scared that they only using me for figuring out there sexualety or for a fetish part or that they are attracted to me being more androgyne/twinky look but as I turn older they will have no interest.

This is going to be a bit of a novel so I apologize in advance.

My luck in the dating arena has been more or less directly in proportion to my degree of comfort with myself. In retrospect I realize how difficult it must have been for some of my lovers when I flinched as though I'd been burned if they accidentally brushed up against the wrong part of me. It didn't seem like there was any place for me, and I didn't know how to go through the awkward "Hi-I-think-you're-really-cute-by-the-way-I-have-a-vagina" conversation. Particularly since I identify as a gay male, and was seeking the same.

I'm fortunate to live in Western WA, and have access to a wonderful sex-positive community, where my opportunities for growth and exploration have been beyond description. There are even some parties that are oriented towards transmasculine folks and their friends, lovers, and admirers. Granted, there are some who are interested in us because our bodies happen to match their particular tastes in lovers, but I've come to the conclusion that that's okay as long as they're not creeps about it. I've learned that peoples' wiring in that department is almost purely random, I mean heck I once knew a guy who couldn't get excited unless maple syrup was involved. No joke.

tldr; I've had a lot of luck dating in the sex-positive communities. I recommend it.

Quote from: Mike88 on November 15, 2012, 09:56:15 PM
I mean heck I once knew a guy who couldn't get excited unless maple syrup was involved. No joke.

I guess this going to my "to do list before I die"