JoAnn said we need to start talking again.  And she wants to see a transgender couples counselor, or see my therapist with me.  I'm going to the GT next Wednesday and I'll see if we can make arrangements. 

I am very relieved.  And maybe things are looking up.

Kathy

That sounds pretty promising! Counseling isn't something you do - much less offer - if you aren't willing to at least consider salvaging the relationship. Good luck!!

This is great news. I am happy for you.

It says a lot that she is looking to better understand what is happening.Hell, I am still trying to understand what is happening with me after these past 2-3 years. I cannot imagine how much more confusing it is for my wife.

Quote from: JoanneB on November 22, 2012, 09:35:07 PM
I cannot imagine how much more confusing it is for my wife.

Quote from: blueconstancy on November 22, 2012, 01:20:09 PM
That sounds pretty promising! Counseling isn't something you do - much less offer - if you aren't willing to at least consider salvaging the relationship. Good luck!!

Thank you girls.

One of the things she said was, "I know you need to tell people how you feel.  And I'm part of this with you."   I was so glad to hear this, and I fully hope she understands the significance of transition.  It's not just a need to express what's felt, but it's also the whole being of my existance.  I realize anyone on the outside will have a lot of difficulty with this confusing concept of existance, yet it's so natural to me. 

Kathy

Quote from: kathy b on November 22, 2012, 01:16:43 PM
JoAnn said we need to start talking again.  And she wants to see a transgender couples counselor, or see my therapist with me.  I'm going to the GT next Wednesday and I'll see if we can make arrangements. 

Good. That sounds much more positive than some of the things we were discussing last week. It will be important to listen to the questions she asks because it will tell you a great deal on what she is thinking and how to go forward from here.

Quote from: kathy b on November 22, 2012, 01:16:43 PMI am very relieved.  And maybe things are looking up.

Indeed, but this is still a very delicate time and whilst I really hope it moves in the right direction for you, I would urge you to continue to be a little cautious.

Good luck to you both!

Quote from: kathy b on November 23, 2012, 09:54:51 AM
I realize anyone on the outside will have a lot of difficulty with this confusing concept of existance, yet it's so natural to me. 

Kathy

Even for those on the inside it is. My wife is MTF and full-time since 1978. We've been together for most of that time. I was trying my best to be "normal" for almost all m life. She saw mainly that normal personna. Occassionaly Joanne. Now she is trying to grasp the whys. If there is any wife that can understand it would be her. Nevertheless it is an immensly difficult task for her

Quote from: JoanneB on November 23, 2012, 11:52:15 AM
Even for those on the inside it is. My wife is MTF and full-time since 1978. We've been together for most of that time. I was trying my best to be "normal" for almost all m life. She saw mainly that normal personna. Occassionaly Joanne. Now she is trying to grasp the whys. If there is any wife that can understand it would be her. Nevertheless it is an immensly difficult task for her

Guess we both need to help our wives understand what's so deep inside.  And tansition will bring even more difficult things to understand and overcome.  If those things can even be accepted.

As much as I need to come out to my sons and family, I now fully know why JoAnn needs me to do this in order for them to see what she has gone through for more than 20 years.  There are deep emotional wounds that have changed her, and she has never spoken to anyone in the family about me (maybe excepting one of my cousins) so when I come out she can finally open up and talk about the secrets that shaped her during those years.

Thank you so much for sharing your life Joanne.   Love and hugs.
Kathy