Hello again.

I have a MtF transgender girlfriend who is planning on flying from Phoenix to Atlanta to see me in the next few weeks. She hasn't had her name or gender legally changed, yet, and her driver's license photo is of her pre-transition. She's full-time, and very passable, and while you can see a resemblance in her photo versus her actual appearance, it looks like it's her brother's ID or something.

Anyhoo, that brings me to my question...

I'm purchasing her ticket online, for her. Has anyone dealt with this issue, or a similar one, post 9/11? I'm wary of how she'll be treated at check-in, TSA checkpoints, and when boarding, plus on any connecting flights.

I would *hope* that the TSA has special sensitivity training on how to professionally and respectfully handle transgender persons, but the weekly news stories on their screw-ups leave me worried.

Furthermore, given increased security measures, I'm also worried about whether or not she'll even be able to get her ticket or board the aircraft.

I'm also planning on calling the airline directly when I'm about to purchase the ticket, and possibly even the TSA, to seek official clarification, but the party line that you get from a company representative, and what that company actually DOES are often two very different things. If anyone were able to give me a good ground-level experience about this, I'd appreciate it.

Thanks for your time!

I've flown recently and had zero issues. I did make sure my DL had a recent picture on it though. I look absolutely nothing like my old DL pic. Not even remotely.

As long as she has a current pic on her ID, and the name on her ID matches the name on the ticket, she should not have any issues. She may consider updating the pic on her DL if its hard to recognize her anymore.

I was prepared for trouble when I got to the airport, but everything went super smooth. My DL still has my old male name and "M" gender marker, for the record. I'd also recommend printing the boarding pass out ahead of time, so if you don't have to check any bags in, you can bypass the check-in line and go straight to security then direct to the gate. Much faster this way too.

I figured that'd be the case, if there was a current picture..Trouble is, she's very resistant to the idea of getting her DL updated. I can understand her reasoning - she doesn't want a picture of the new her, associated with her old name...But there are legitimate concerns about being able to effectively identify yourself that take precedence, I've been arguing.

You might also read this link: http://www.tsa.gov/traveler-information/transgender-travelers

Which is the TSA Official policy for dealing with transgendered people. I printed out a copy and had it with me .

Quote from: Sebass on November 23, 2012, 09:06:19 AM
I figured that'd be the case, if there was a current picture..Trouble is, she's very resistant to the idea of getting her DL updated. I can understand her reasoning - she doesn't want a picture of the new her, associated with her old name...But there are legitimate concerns about being able to effectively identify yourself that take precedence, I've been arguing.

Trust me, so was I. No girl wants to have an ID with a male name and "M" gender marker. It was the only way I found to deal with flying other than changing my name and sex on my DL which requires SRS in the state I live to do.

She can roll the dice, and see if she gets an understanding TSA agent... But I wouldn't want to bet on it. And who wants to get to airport, all packed and ready to go only to be turned away. That would suck as well.

JennX is - so far as I've seen and talked to people about - correct.^*  TSA is under orders (it's the main reason they are there) to make sure the person getting on the plane is the person on the ticket and that they have legal photo ID as such.  (Why, I ain't got a clue, all the 9-11 highjackers had ID, so it would not have stopped them).  That, and making you walk through the medal detector/radiation scanner/pat-down.  And because there are in the end only two things for the TSA to do (despite the huge apparatus that's there to enforce it - call it 'security theater'), and they are the law, and they are being HEAVILY supervised, they tend not to let either slide.

So...just like there is NO way to get on a plane w/o doing one version of the second, it's going to be equally hard if you are standing there with an ID that does not look like you.  No matter how understanding Mister TSA Man is, they pretty much CAN'T let anyone through who doesn't match their ID.  All they/you can do is get the supervisor involved because they don't' have - nor should they - have much leeway in their decisions, and my experience is that once they call in their supervisors then you're really hosed, as they truly ARE jerks.  (Also, from that point on, you really can't just get up and walk out - you're not under arrest, technically, but as soon as they pull you over/out of line you could be, call it double secret probation.)

So tell your friend, that from what I've seen, the indignity of having to get a new ID is a lot less than running afoul of the TSA (who seems to have a whole lot of people with little to do EXCEPT harass people), and given the general indignity (because cattle are treated better on their way to the feedlot) of flying in the first place these days, that having to get a new ID is just one more abuse, and perhaps not even the worse abuse, in the Modern Aviation AbuseStack.

Update the photo.



*I'm a seasoned veteran of air travel, including a few pre-jet age flights under my belt, DC-6.  My dad flew for an airline and I grew up at airports and I KNOW airlines all too well, so someone who get's to the airport long, long in advance of the flight (just in case my flight is canceled I like to get there with enough time to make them change me) and hence has spent a lot of wasted hours watching the whole TSA song and dance.  Airports are fantastic for people watching - you got winners, losers, celebrities and everyone else, its' a trip - and watching them interact with TSA Security Theater is one of the best places to watch people.  Even real famous people - people we all know from TV and stuff - have to do TSA.  Equality for all.  So if you are concourse side (not on the terminal side) then you are watching all these people come toward you and get to watch how they react to playing stupid human tricks in an airport.  The whole 'shoe thing' just quadrupled the fun, because that's just kind of weird and demeaning at the same time.  Let me tell you there are equal parts hilarity and sexy in watching the TSA Shoe Dance.

"Let me tell you there are equal parts hilarity and sexy in watching the TSA Shoe Dance."

I doubt I'm going to hear a funnier statement than that today!

Sebass, I went to see your other posts regarding your girlfriend. First I would like to thank you for the service you do for our country (not to mention a perfect gentleman). Second, I agree with others, if she looks different than the ID pic she should update her DL to avoid embarrassing issue at the airport. I've been living full time as a woman even before I moved to USA and been carrying ID and passport with M gender and never have issue traveling in the US or abroad. I had SRS (sex change op) recently and most of my paperwork are now in F, thankfully.

Maybe you should talk to her to weigh which issue is more important and makes more sense. I hope I don't sound too intrusive but since it looks to me like you are having a long distant relationship with her, I asume you already met her in person?

I don't know any mtfs' experiences, but I do know of some ftms'. Yes, TSA has a policy and if she can find it online might be helpful to print it out (It is out there, as I have seen it). They are not supposed to hassle you and if you are wearing prosthetics they aren't allowed to ask you to remove them or feel them any more than they could a real ____. Anyway that's policy. What actually happens in real life might be different.

I know people who have had good experiences. A friend of mine flew with a packer. They realized something was off with the scanner so they took him to a room and the TSA agents were actually supportive. OTOH, some have had more negative experiences. The actual gender on the ID isn't so much what they notice, but the looks and so on that may get her pulled out. SHe needs to be ready for this kind of thing.

--Jay J

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Quote from: mintra on November 23, 2012, 03:24:10 PM
I hope I don't sound too intrusive but since it looks to me like you are having a long distant relationship with her, I asume you already met her in person?

While I dislike answering that question when anyone asks me, because it seems that the solidity, validity, and sincerity of the relationship always gets called into question shortly thereafter, as does both of ours maturity and commitment, but...

No. I've not met her in person, yet. We met online, and in the now about month and a half we've been talking, we will text all day, and be on the phone and on Skype anywhere from 3-12 hours per day, not counting us falling asleep 'together'. Within just a week of really talking to her, I fell for her, and she for me, harder than any other woman I've ever met, and harder than I'd ever even thought possible - the short amount of time it happened in completely aside. Since then, it has intensified by orders of magnitude every single day after.

I know that many people who happen to skim through this will see this post, and start viewing these and any future posts I might make with a degree of skepticism - for a variety of reasons, I'm sure - but I don't care. I cannot even begin to articulate, describe, or explain the scope of my feelings, and I will not attempt to do so. Write me off as a hopeless romantic, or any number of other far worse labels, if you wish.

Anyhow, tl;dr - We met online, and have yet to meet each other in person. It's not too forward or unreasonable of you to ask, though, regardless of my hesitance to answer that question. I apologize that my reply took so long.

This blog may be of use to you:  http://kimberlyhuddle.blogspot.com/

Randi

First get the ticket in your exact -legal name- as it reads on your ID and also give them the gender that is on your ID. Doesn't matter what you look like if the gender on your ID doesn't match the ticket. The other thing, the picture has to look pretty close to what you look like now. Mine has female picture (and female name, legally changed) but still has an M. They didn't blink an eye the last time I flew. She might run into some questions/problems if she has a very male looking picture (i.e. facial hair, bald etc) and shows up as a passable woman. I have no experience with that but have read people having issues with that. I mean really, an ID needs to look like the person or what is the point of it?

Quote from: Sebass on November 24, 2012, 03:16:36 PM
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It's not too forward or unreasonable of you to ask, though, regardless of my hesitance to answer that question. I apologize that my reply took so long.

Please don't apologize. I should be the one to offer you the apology for my intrusive question. You are a perfect gentleman and I wish you both the best of luck. Back to the traveling issue, I just wanted to add that even though she understandably feels uncomfortable associating her new identity with M gender on the ID, but think about 5 minutes at the DMV vs the risk of being questioned by TSA and treated like a criminal suspect in front of a slew of passengers waiting anxiously in line. Like many ladies here, I traveled a lot in recent years both domestic and international, not once have I had a problem with my gender on my ID or passport. Their concerns are about national security and the picture should match the real person.

I read your post one more time, if she can get her ID replaced before the flight with a picture of how she presently looks, she should. That said, some states now give you a "temp ID" which is just a piece of paper, not laminated, which looks like it was done on a home inkjet printer. You get the "real one" weeks later in the mail. I know the federal government i.e. the social security people do NOT accept these temp ID's and not sure how the TSA is about them.

Thanks for the tips on the temp ID, I'll call the TSA, and the airport she's flying out of, tomorrow and ask them about that. I got a similar paper copy of my DL for Georgia, before they (allegedly) mailed my my plastic license. Two months later, I've yet to see the plastic one...

Quote from: Sebass on November 25, 2012, 12:05:19 AM
Thanks for the tips on the temp ID, I'll call the TSA, and the airport she's flying out of, tomorrow and ask them about that. I got a similar paper copy of my DL for Georgia, before they (allegedly) mailed my my plastic license. Two months later, I've yet to see the plastic one...

I went thru a nightmare with the GA DMV on this. After 3 months, no "real" license and numerous phone calls, they sent me back to the DMV. They took my picture again but this time gave me the "old school" kind that day. It seems they are very picky about how your face is centered in the picture at the place that issues these new kind or something. If it "kicks" the picture, they don't inform anyone. You just never get your ID. You probably should give them a call.

Quote from: Stephe on November 25, 2012, 12:57:48 AM
If it "kicks" the picture, they don't inform anyone. You just never get your ID.

That definitely sounds like the great state of Georgia...

There is another reason to have one when you're on the road.  And it's because it's a lot harder to clear up misunderstandings with the local police when you're a long way from home.  No one there can vouch for you, and it's hard to make a phone call to confirm who you are if the cops are not taking the ID.

Or clubs and stuff like that.  Some cities have an ordinance that all nightclubs and the like HAVE TO CHECK each ID, no matter how old you look.  Everyone.  Again, if you don't have one that looks like you.... who knows?

And where TSA has ream of guidelines, the cop has few, the bouncer/doorman none.