Hello Susan's Place,
I am very excited to be joining this forum today! I am in need of some kind of a community that can help support me as I begin this new journey with my wife as she transitions.
I can give you a little bit of back story. I married my partner 6 years ago. We were high school sweethearts and when we got married the world saw my wife as a man (and I did too). In our first four years of marriage we lived in Japan for a year, moved to Oklahoma and converted to Judaism. About a year and a half ago my partner decided that she (then "he") wanted to become a Rabbi, so we moved to Philadelphia so she could study at the RRC. I went back to school to get my Masters in Early Childhood Education. When we celebrated our 5 year wedding anniversary, I thought things were going well and was blind sided when my partner came out to me as being transgendered. She came out to me a few days before my 29th birthday and shaved off her beard on my birthday. (This year I told her I just wanted to go out to eat... with no surprises).
To make a long story short, this past year has been difficult for me. I struggled with my partner's transition at first and was really angry/hurt/depressed for a long time. But I found that once I started listening to what my wife had to say about her struggles and once I saw how much happier she was becoming the more she transitioned, the more I was able to accept this change.
What has surprised me most about this transition is that in many ways our partnership has been better. We laugh more, my partner is more open with me and she holds my hand in public!!! (I remember how before she transitioned my partner would pull her hand away when I tried to hold it in public. That would always make me feel so terrible).
So I have decided that I still really love this person and that I want to stay with her as she transitions. This person in my soul mate and that has not changed.
That being said, I still need support during all of this and there are days that are hard. Dealing with people's mean comments, stupid questions and dealing with transphobia has been hard!!!! So I thought joining this forum would help me and give me a place to vent to others who are dealing with similar issues. Also, it would help to find others who I could learn from during this exciting/crazy/scary/joyful time. Also, if I can help anyone in some way with my experience that would be cool too!
Take care and I will keep posting!
