I just tell people I'm sterile now. Shuts them right up. It's actually kind of funny to see the insert foot into mouth look they give too.

Quote from: Karen on December 24, 2012, 02:58:19 PM
I just tell people I'm sterile now. Shuts them right up. It's actually kind of funny to see the insert foot into mouth look they give too.

That's great! Makes them feel guilty for asking. 

I get this a lot. I don't hate children I just don't need to have kids to be happy and don't feel right adding more kids with health issues into the world. I already don't get to do a lot of things I would love to do due to finances, a kid would just exasperate that even more too. On top of all that, I know having kids would just make my dysphoria even worse.

my cis female friend who doesnt want kids is always being told that she will change her mind. i can understand that people saying your opinion is invalid because it will change is stupid.

I had a time when I was about 21 when I did ponder whether my opinion of not wanting biological kids was accurate. It didn't last long - that future isn't for me, nothing in me resonates with it. I've never wanted kids of my own. I don't understand the concept of wanting a nuclear family, that's alien and not my life. And I hate it that no-one seems to listen when I explain my thoughts, and just say that I will end up wanting one. I've even tried wanting a kid because of the social pressure to be "normal" in that way.

Of course, my mom does think that should be my life. I'm 24, but (very understandably) she hasn't still grasped the concept of her only kid not wanting to give her biological grandchildren. She doesn't approach the subject often with me, but it's been often enough. I hate hurting her. I'm trying to make her understand slowly and without hurting her too much. And well, it is still totally possible that I'd want to be a "social parent" in some poly relationship or even adopt with someone.

I've been getting this a lot lately too. Setting aside the fact that I couldn't do it in a way that feels right for me, it's not something I'm interested in. But given that I'm 24 and too young in most people's minds to make this decision, I expect to hear this for awhile. An older single cis male friend of mine has even brought it up recently, like "oh just wait, you'll want them eventually". It's been interesting since no one ever said this kind of stuff to me when I presented as a lesbian. Of course people generally know that lesbian couples can have children but it's not the go-to type of question the way it is for cis-appearing men and women (at least in my experience).

It's been simultaneously weird and comforting to blend into heteronormative culture. Mostly comforting in the sense that I get to choose which culture to identify with rather than it being chosen for me (because of something like gender presentation), but it still feels foreign when things like this happen.

i am young. very young.
having kids???
never ever
sometime u will feel that u will be incapable but i easily stop it before i start taking it 2 seriously.........
disclosed 2 some1 online he said that after puberty everything will be alright.
he is wrong. no more population increase.
besides that i have seen my parents suffer due 2 me.
so wont i be repayed?

I got this a lot as a kid. "Someday you'll get older and want kids. No? You're young now, wait and see."

I currently act as a father to several teenagers, and yeah I enjoy it, but popping out my own? Nope, I'm good. There's plenty to go around without my contribution. (My uncle and friend had three kids each. I don't even know.)

What is it that makes people think everyone wants their own biological baby? The cuteness? Because honestly, what is appealing about changing diapers for a year, spending thousands of dollars on medical care, school, food, ect. And when teenagerdom arrives...