Quote from: LilDevilOfPrada on January 07, 2013, 04:37:35 PM
Then trust me never let him try ipad games 

We have an ipad, and he has played it. But, while he is playing it all I have to do is mention his toys and he puts it down and goes to get his toys. He really likes to use his imagination. 

Quote from: Brooke777 on January 07, 2013, 04:54:13 PM
We have an ipad, and he has played it. But, while he is playing it all I have to do is mention his toys and he puts it down and goes to get his toys. He really likes to use his imagination. 

Thats a good sign imaginative kids develop best (not always but I was always told they do).

Thanks for replying everyone :-)

I have a ciswoman friend that used to build WWII tank models xD. Another one was a huge fan of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and never understood why her parents kept giving her dolls. None of them has gender issues; they are very certain of their feminity.

It's just that I keep seeing and reading testimonials like "I always prefered dolls and pink and mermaids and rainbow stickers" and whatever that's SUPOSEDLY for girls. You don't see in documentaries about transexuality MTFs that used to collect skull pins and played with a creative mix of gi-joes, heman, terminator and whatever fell into their hands to create stories that could last weeks or months.

The typical image we get from documentaries is the "trapped in the wrong body" image. At some point, the "I used to play with dolls" line pops up. The idea that people can say "aaah... he used to play with girl toys... it makes sense" bothers me. It contributed to people telling me "are you sure about that transitioning thing? I mean... when you were a boy you were just a normal boy that liked boy stuff". I suppose some things are more obvious than others.

I played outside, with sticks and grass and dad's tools that he never saw again.

Quote from: Alex_K on January 07, 2013, 05:10:42 PM
Thanks for replying everyone :-)

I have a ciswoman friend that used to build WWII tank models xD. Another one was a huge fan of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and never understood why her parents kept giving her dolls. None of them has gender issues; they are very certain of their feminity.

It's just that I keep seeing and reading testimonials like "I always prefered dolls and pink and mermaids and rainbow stickers" and whatever that's SUPOSEDLY for girls. You don't see in documentaries about transexuality MTFs that used to collect skull pins and played with a creative mix of gi-joes, heman, terminator and whatever fell into their hands to create stories that could last weeks or months.

The typical image we get from documentaries is the "trapped in the wrong body" image. At some point, the "I used to play with dolls" line pops up. The idea that people can say "aaah... he used to play with girl toys... it makes sense" bothers me. It contributed to people telling me "are you sure about that transitioning thing? I mean... when you were a boy you were just a normal boy that liked boy stuff". I suppose some things are more obvious than others.

My one friend has been doing drums since she was little and build vintage war ships, so yea gender doesnt equal the toys.

Quote from: Alex_K on January 07, 2013, 05:10:42 PM
Thanks for replying everyone :-)

I have a ciswoman friend that used to build WWII tank models xD. Another one was a huge fan of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and never understood why her parents kept giving her dolls. None of them has gender issues; they are very certain of their feminity.

It's just that I keep seeing and reading testimonials like "I always prefered dolls and pink and mermaids and rainbow stickers" and whatever that's SUPOSEDLY for girls. You don't see in documentaries about transexuality MTFs that used to collect skull pins and played with a creative mix of gi-joes, heman, terminator and whatever fell into their hands to create stories that could last weeks or months.

The typical image we get from documentaries is the "trapped in the wrong body" image. At some point, the "I used to play with dolls" line pops up. The idea that people can say "aaah... he used to play with girl toys... it makes sense" bothers me. It contributed to people telling me "are you sure about that transitioning thing? I mean... when you were a boy you were just a normal boy that liked boy stuff". I suppose some things are more obvious than others.

That was what my family's  exact first reaction when I came out. " You were nothing like the ones who said they were born in the wrong body, You didn't even touch a doll when you are little and you were such an active child". I had to try so hard to convince them it was who I am and it has nothing to do with my gender.  and I had to remember then I loved hopscotch and play houses too lol.  And this same typical gender stereotyping made my gender confusion worse specially when in me early teens. I knew I was a girl inside but still I was an adrenaline junkie who loved outdoor activities. There are so many things separated between girls activities and boys activities. I was more in to boy side of the spectrum and I thought becoming a girl I had to give up all the things I liked doing. But I always wanted to do those things I liked as a girl and it took me several years to realize that I can do those.

The only two documentaries I had watched without stereotypical childhoods were the Prodigal Sons and She is a Boy I knew. I think they should do more documneteries like that without the ones that says " Ohhhhh...... I used to be so feminine when I was little and I only played with dolls"   

Quote from: anya921 on January 07, 2013, 11:05:26 PM
I think they should do more documneteries like that without the ones that says " Ohhhhh...... I used to be so feminine when I was little and I only played with dolls"

^^^^ THIS!!!!!!!!

People have femininity/masculinity confused with female/male identity. Two totally different things. A lot of women with masculine interests, both cis and trans, identify as females.

whatever I could get my hands on 

Quote from: agfrommd on January 08, 2013, 06:50:38 AM
^^^^ THIS!!!!!!!!

People have femininity/masculinity confused with female/male identity. Two totally different things. A lot of women with masculine interests, both cis and trans, identify as females.

Exactly I am female but I ain't no Barbie.

Quote from: girl you look fierce on January 08, 2013, 10:26:58 AM
Well I played with mostly girly things, but then I had a big sister and I was always playing with her and her friends.  So yeah I played with barbies and ponies and we played house and tea party and stuff.  I also liked doing craft things, so when I got slightly older I did crocheting and beads and that kind of stuff.

OTOH I played more neutral things too, like tag and hide and seek.  I knew boys who were into GI Joes and army men and stuff but tbh I never got into the more fighting-oriented toys. 

I know they did like a study that said boys are more interested in boyish toys... I think that is probably true but I can't really say personally, cause my sister was my big influence as a kid.

Boys like boys toys because they are programmed to by many surrounding factors,  same with girls.

 I played with Hot Wheels, Lego, video games, and my sister. It was nice to share interests with her in most things.

I don't really feel like playing with those toys is a marker of gender... Your gender might be apparent in how you play with them, but it's really quite a non-issue. Building things out of Lego was a thousand times better than playing with dolls; when you play with dolls, you use your imagination, but when you build with Lego, you exercise your creativity.

Ah, the good old days...

I think there is too much emphasis placed upon gender and what we do that defines it particularly as a child, amongst other things. Because a boy plays with a doll he will grow up to be gay or trans? Perhaps. Or maybe he's emulating he father caring for his baby sister. Because a girl wears cargo pants and has her hair buzzed she must be les or trans? Perhaps. Or maybe her mother and uncle are fighting in the military and she wants to grow up and defend her country too. Does it matter what little trinkets and oddities we do and should they define us? I think we place to much trust and force on these simple acts and allow them to dictate our lives. How you feel comes from the heart and only you know what it says. You feel you're a boy. Great. You were born a female. Great. You also feel you are gay. Great. Does not change your character, your ability to function, or your ability to love and show compassion one bit.

On a less serious note and more to topic, I grew up playing with Barbies, Transformers, Hot Wheels, My Little Pony, Legos, Makeup, Sticks, Dirt, Bugs, and Imaginary Friends. I always new I was a boy though. However, I still wanted pink furry carpet and to live in a sparkling castle with my prince.

Quote from: LilDevilOfPrada on January 08, 2013, 10:43:46 AM
Boys like boys toys because they are programmed to by many surrounding factors,  same with girls.

I doubt this.

Wife and I used to believe it, until we had kids and tried to teach them to be gender-neutral...none of our 3 kids put up with that nonsense, and we were just smart enough to realize that *they* knew what kinds of toys they wanted to play with.

Also, kids are not blank slates until written upon...we saw their personalities immediately (or soon after) they were born, and throughout their life we saw them take things in, modify them to their own needs, and create entirely original things...they displayed very little in the way of automaton behaviors.

Quote from: Beth Andrea on January 08, 2013, 01:58:22 PM
I doubt this.

Wife and I used to believe it, until we had kids and tried to teach them to be gender-neutral...none of our 3 kids put up with that nonsense, and we were just smart enough to realize that *they* knew what kinds of toys they wanted to play with.

Also, kids are not blank slates until written upon...we saw their personalities immediately (or soon after) they were born, and throughout their life we saw them take things in, modify them to their own needs, and create entirely original things...they displayed very little in the way of automaton behaviors.

Well to be fair, endophysiology isn't so simple that people who haven't studied it can make accurate generalized statements. I apologise.

Quote from: girl you look fierce on January 08, 2013, 10:26:58 AM
Well I played with mostly girly things, but then I had a big sister and I was always playing with her and her friends.  So yeah I played with barbies and ponies and we played house and tea party and stuff.  I also liked doing craft things, so when I got slightly older I did crocheting and beads and that kind of stuff.

So much of this has to do with opportunity. Given that my dad tried to "fix" me by starting boy scout troops and setting up boxing tournaments (which I then loathed and avoided, but usually had to put some token effort into) I've always assumed he was aware of my stereotypical feminine interests. But I also recall not always getting nearly as many opportunities to play with the toys I preferred, and usually had to be fairly clever to increase the time I was able to spend at those activities, which often involved some stealth and concealment at times.

I did play with some action figures, but I didn't own any of them... I would usually play with them when I was sent off to play with boys in the neighborhood. 

In early childhood, most of my playmates were girls, but this became more complicated as time went on, and as my family were not especially encouraging it as time went on either. Being coerced into playing with boys probably has more than a little to do with my issues with them. My ex and I joked yesterday about the irony, since I made it very clear when we were planning to have children, that I was very uncomfortable with the idea of raising a boy, and now we're both dealing with someone we thought was a daughter (granted, never typically feminine) who is on his way to becoming a man.

Up to 6-7 YO I played with my sisters barbies, but after that it become too painful to bear the beatings when I was found playing with dolls, specially since the beatings would almost invariably be extended to my sisters for "aiding and abetting."

From 7-12 YO I played by going into the forest and climbing trees, hiding in the caves, and climbing the mountains, no friends, no toys.

Quote from: peky on January 08, 2013, 06:52:56 PM
Up to 6-7 YO I played with my sisters barbies, but after that it become too painful to bear the beatings when I was found playing with dolls, specially since the beatings would almost invariably be extended to my sisters for "aiding and abetting."

From 7-12 YO I played by going into the forest and climbing trees, hiding in the caves, and climbing the mountains, no friends, no toys.

    hugs!

Seriously that sucks, kids are horrible (or was you talking about your parents?)

Quote from: Beth Andrea on January 08, 2013, 01:58:22 PM
I doubt this.

Wife and I used to believe it, until we had kids and tried to teach them to be gender-neutral...none of our 3 kids put up with that nonsense, and we were just smart enough to realize that *they* knew what kinds of toys they wanted to play with.

I had a similar experience. I remember giving my daughter a toy fire truck for an early birthday along with the girly stuff. The little one gave us a look like "what the heck am I supposed to do with THIS?"

I played with quite a variety over the years of my youth. I had a sailor GI Joe my Dad gave me that was followed by several more. I didn't have any dolls save for my one Barbie that I traded a Joe for. I kept her hidden most of the time. When I was still in elementary school I preferred playng with the girls and wasn't much interested in the football or basketball games. As I got older I would go out exploring with the other boys into the woods of the abandoned Naval Air Station. I did have a collection of model airplanes until I upset my Brother one day. He ended up shooting them off of the ceiling with his BB gun. Later I got a 10 speed and took my exploration farther from home.

I played with just about everything. My parents were very liberal about this for the 50s-60s. I had trucks, cars, dolls, blocks, lincoln logs, etc. I spent time lining up toys like some other Asperger kids. Also spent a lot of time drawing.

I also climbed trees, hid in the grass, rode bikes, that whole thing.

I played with boys and girls in the neighborhood and was much more accepted than I was at school for some reason.

I don't think that my play was very gendered.

--Jay