That annoying question. I am neutrois ( female to neutrois) and I will be going to college next year.  I already talked to the school about my identity and how i'd prefer to room with the males. ( I came out to my family as ftm before neutrois) The 1st and 2 year students live either in boy or girl dorms.  The issue i have is when I start T the gender marker will still be female( school won't let me live in the male dorms)... I already know I'll be getting " If you're a boy why are you living in the female dorms" Any tips on how to respond to that without giving my whole life history?

Only thing I can think of would be to say that there was a mix up, but even that is going to lead to unwanted questions as to why they haven't sorted it out for a whole year...

Is there a way that you could live off-campus?

Live off campus or go to a different school. You might also ask to see the exact policy that governs housing. Sometimes "policies" are just practices that can't be defended.

Well, you can say, "Law," and then walk off. 

Quote from: sweetashiro on January 13, 2013, 06:04:40 PM
That annoying question. I am neutrois ( female to neutrois) and I will be going to college next year.  I already talked to the school about my identity and how i'd prefer to room with the males. ( I came out to my family as ftm before neutrois) The 1st and 2 year students live either in boy or girl dorms.  The issue i have is when I start T the gender marker will still be female( school won't let me live in the male dorms)... I already know I'll be getting " If you're a boy why are you living in the female dorms" Any tips on how to respond to that without giving my whole life history?

Are you planning on changing your name and living full time as male? Or keep your identity? Maybe I should scratch what I am saying and just say that a coming out could be In your future? Or if you want to live full time as a male then deal with it then. You'll be in a much better position to negotiate living conditions.

Neutrois is someone who seeks to look androgynous. If that is the case then you're going to come across many questions about your gender in the binary world. It stinks but it is what it is.

As many others have suggested, if I was in your shoes I'd definitely be looking for some queer friendly roommates and live off campus.

There is a certain built in frustration with being in between. Us trans guys pre-T or not on T so long get this and people in your situation. You will always get this, unless at some point you get older and people are 90% sure you are one or the other. So you are going to have to find a way of dealing with it.

I kind of like Simon's answer. Find some like minded folks and hang together.

--Jay

Quote from: LearnedHand on January 13, 2013, 06:12:35 PM
Is there a way that you could live off-campus?

maybe, I prefer to live on campus tho seeing as I don't know that state at all 

Quote from: Zumbagirl on January 13, 2013, 08:02:55 PM
Are you planning on changing your name and living full time as male? Or keep your identity? Maybe I should scratch what I am saying and just say that a coming out could be In your future? Or if you want to live full time as a male then deal with it then. You'll be in a much better position to negotiate living conditions.

I plan on changing my name to brayden and for the most part keep my identity. If i'm in a public place with people I don't know I just go with whatever pronouns they use. I already came out to my family as trans (never said FtM)

Quote from: DianaP on January 13, 2013, 06:16:12 PM
Well, you can say, "Law," and then walk off. 

Haha, yeah I should