We Need to Drop "Passing" from the Trans Lexicon
Posted: March 14, 2012 | Author: Amy Dentata

http://amydentata.com/2012/03/14/we-need-to-drop-passing-from-the-trans-lexicon/

Note: "Passing" is a concept that exists in several different marginalized communities. For example, it can be important for people of color to pass as white to avoid violence, and it can be important for Jewish people to pass as non-Jewish amid antisemitism. For more on the history (and present state; this is ongoing stuff) of passing beyond the trans variety, read this article from Transadvocate.

"Passing" is an inherently broken concept. You can only "pass" as something you're not. To say a trans woman "passes" as a woman, is to say she isn't really a woman. It is much more accurate to describe how one is read, not if one passes. "I was read as female at work today" is a lot more accurate than "I passed at work today". Think about it: When cisgender people are misgendered (which happens often), is it accurate to say they weren't passing? Does anyone ever hold cisgender people to the gold standard of passability? It never happens. Why do you think that is?

Gendering is an active process done by the observer, not the person being observed. When someone is gendered, they are being read as one gender or another by the observer. It is the observer's beliefs, socialization, and cultural norms that decide how they gender someone when looking at them. Social gender is a collaborative act. Society constantly redefines which cues mean what, and its members adjust their appearance to fit the norm. The language of "passing", however, unfairly places the onus of "proper" gender presentation on the person being observed. It says to trans, intersex, and gender non-conforming people, "if you're harassed, it's your fault!" It falsely describes gendering as a passive, natural process and encourages victim-blaming. It is never a trans person's fault for being misgendered or victimized, but "passing" makes it so.

In never liked "passing." It implies that you can fail as a woman/man. Not cool.   

I think I agree with that idea.

I realize that it has a different meaning of reference in the trans community but I don't really care for the term, mostly because it tends to register as either gastric mishaps or dead people in my mind

This bothers me on two counts.

1. She's not asking for what she really wants. She says she wants us to stop using the term "passing" but in reality she wants us to stop attaching the same importance to it. I don't like people policing my language.

2. Passing IS something that many of us want. There is a BIG difference from someone treating you like a woman because they understand about transgender to someone treating you like a woman because they can't tell you ever had a male body.

In one case you need that person's cooperation. With some people you'll get it. With some people you won't. (Reference Beth Andrea's story about the passenger that would no longer talk to her, just kept repeating a bible passage about god creating male and female).

In the other case you don't need anyone's cooperation. Even if they are an avowed trans hater, they can't hate you because they don't know they are trans.

Despite all this, I do agree with what she's saying. We do buy too much into the idea that passing deserves better treatment than non-passing. We do put pressure on trans women to pass, we sometimes heap derision on women who don't have voice therapy, who don't dress to blend in, who don't learn to move like a woman, etc. I also think that there would be a lot more acceptance of trans people if fewer of us passed. We would be more noticeable. Our friends and neighbors would be more aware of us, aware that we're ordinary people like them and not deviants.

Quote from: agfrommd on January 15, 2013, 08:48:21 AM
This bothers me on two counts.

1. She's not asking for what she really wants. She says she wants us to stop using the term "passing" but in reality she wants us to stop attaching the same importance to it. I don't like people policing my language.

2. Passing IS something that many of us want. There is a BIG difference from someone treating you like a woman because they understand about transgender to someone treating you like a woman because they can't tell you ever had a male body.

In one case you need that person's cooperation. With some people you'll get it. With some people you won't. (Reference Beth Andrea's story about the passenger that would no longer talk to her, just kept repeating a bible passage about god creating male and female).

In the other case you don't need anyone's cooperation. Even if they are an avowed trans hater, they can't hate you because they don't know they are trans.

Despite all this, I do agree with what she's saying. We do buy too much into the idea that passing deserves better treatment than non-passing. We do put pressure on trans women to pass, we sometimes heap derision on women who don't have voice therapy, who don't dress to blend in, who don't learn to move like a woman, etc. I also think that there would be a lot more acceptance of trans people if fewer of us passed. We would be more noticeable. Our friends and neighbors would be more aware of us, aware that we're ordinary people like them and not deviants.

So you would be happy for someone to say something like 'Agfrommd had a great day passing (him/her self off) as a woman.' about you? As that is what the term passing really implies.. I don't pass as a woman - I am one.

I'm with her, although I agree I don't want someone telling me what I should or shouldn't call myself. As far as I'm concerned, I gave up on "passing" when I stopped pretending to be a man.