FWIW, I've often felt jealous of FTMs. My reasons:
- They tend to find passing much easier, once they've had top surgery and HRT, especially.
- I've never heard an MTF report that someone they told about their transsexuality asked them, when they were going to do something about it (on the assumption that they were a woman, intending to transition to male). I hear/see this story in the reverse quite often from post-transition FTMs.
- There's no doubt in my mind that socially speaking, it's easier to live as a man in this society. I really wish I could do that and still have any sense of integrity. It would be so much simpler.
- I recall academic studies that noted that, while FTMs do have many of the same social maturation problems that MTFs face, they have had a better history of being accepted and admired, especially within the lesbian community. Granted, there are those in the community who are hostile to both FTMs and MTFs.
- I greatly admire how FTMs tend to be much more practical and no-nonsense about transition. Once they make their minds up, they often just get on with it... far less of the hand-wringing and self doubt that is common to many (and hugely dysfunctional in my own life) about how I have approached things, allowing many who had no place in my life to influence and even negotiate matters surrounding an identity that, at some level, has never really been in doubt for me.
This is particularly ironic, now that I am dealing with supporting my son, emotionally, at least, through his own transition.
You'll get no argument from me that (like most of the moms I talked to when my kids were infants, toddlers and young children) dressing a girl is a lot more fun. There are a few advantages, but I also don't know any woman who really, completely is at peace with or "likes" her own body. And this is such a huge source of insecurity for many of us, no matter what we end up looking like post-transition, or in some cases even before transition.
