For what seems like my whole life I've always been a bit jealous of cis women, that they have been born in the correct body. Its always a wish that I was born correctly but despite my jealousy I'm extremely happy to finally be on hormones the past few weeks. Sometimes I feel that being trans is an unlucky accident, that someone up there went woops.. Does anyone else ever feel a bit jealous cis folks the way I feel, that they are the lucky majority?

For a very long time I felt that everyone must feel as I did. Assuming cis women do exist, yes I have been jealous. Particularly on issues like childbearing, and going through a non-dysphoric puberty. Or at least one that was less distressing than mine? I do try to take comfort that my experience may give me some advantages. For instance, even before I had come out more clearly, I would frequently get comments from actresses at script readings about how my female characters sounded far more like real women than most of the women in scripts they read. (Playwrights and screenwriters have typically been mostly male for a very long time).

Quote from: girl you look fierce on January 21, 2013, 10:31:01 AM
Ofc... though only to a point, I feel intensely jealous of the ability to be cis even though there are a lot of women whose body I wouldn't wanna trade for given the chance.

Good point there. Being born cis wouldn't guarantee happiness. And cis women also have horrible body image. Every teenage girl thinks she's too fat. Really if born cis, you'd probably be just obsessing over different body parts.

Quote from: Elspeth on January 21, 2013, 10:43:45 AM
For a very long time I felt that everyone must feel as I did. Assuming cis women do exist, yes I have been jealous. Particularly on issues like childbearing, and going through a non-dysphoric puberty. Or at least one that was less distressing than mine? I do try to take comfort that my experience may give me some advantages. For instance, even before I had come out more clearly, I would frequently get comments from actresses at script readings about how my female characters sounded far more like real women than most of the women in scripts they read. (Playwrights and screenwriters have typically been mostly male for a very long time).

I always wondered if actors and actresses noticed that.  I can almost always tell the gender of the writer of tv shows, movies, books, etc. just by how they write the dialog.  I am always super impressed when both genders seem genuine in a story.

Quote from: girl you look fierce on January 21, 2013, 10:31:01 AM
Ofc... though only to a point, I feel intensely jealous of the ability to be cis even though there are a lot of women whose body I wouldn't wanna trade for given the chance.

I think, probably, that I would rather have the right body than be beautiful or even not even attractive.  I think I would get into shape, though, whatever body I traded for lol.

Quote from: Fat Admin on January 21, 2013, 10:50:40 AM
Good point there. Being born cis wouldn't guarantee happiness. And cis women also have horrible body image. Every teenage girl thinks she's too fat. Really if born cis, you'd probably be just obsessing over different body parts.

I think it would be simpler to born in the correct body but to be honest I'm happy the way I am now, despite my jealousies my experiences I've gone through made me the person I am today and I wouldn't trade it back for the world, I am who I am.

Quote from: JuliaVB on January 21, 2013, 10:26:55 AM
For what seems like my whole life I've always been a bit jealous of cis women, that they have been born in the correct body. Its always a wish that I was born correctly but despite my jealousy I'm extremely happy to finally be on hormones the past few weeks. Sometimes I feel that being trans is an unlucky accident, that someone up there went woops.. Does anyone else ever feel a bit jealous cis folks the way I feel, that they are the lucky majority?

Not even a drop of jealousy at all. In fact I would be willing to bet that a born woman would be jealous of being me. I have all the same equipment without the hassles. I don't have to worry about getting pregnant, or being monthly cramped, or having to wear your favorite pair of granny pants every month. I got my experience of having go wear a pad for the one and only time in my life after my surgery and to be honest, I learned why women hate it. It is really is uncomfortable.

Quote from: girl you look fierce on January 21, 2013, 11:40:04 AM
Suit yourself w/o the possibility of being beautiful I think I'd go insane...

Hehe.  I want to have babies more than anything, ever

That would be rad if they did!  Twill be too late for me though, sadly.

Quote from: Jen on January 21, 2013, 11:48:51 AM
Hehe.  I want to have babies more than anything, ever

I feel the same,I would give up anything to have a baby  , and I wish I can feel what it be like to have my period, The growing up, figuring things out as a cis woman.  But I was never jealous of cis woman. Before I transitioned every time I saw a nicely dresses women,it got me depressed  but not any more. I am one of them now. .

I became an emotional basketcase twice last year.  Once when my sister had her first baby and once when my sister-in-law had hers.  I went and saw them after their babies were born and was instantly overcome with emotion.  I cried and cried and was depressed for weeks both times.  And I couldn't even tell anybody I was going through that because it was so selfish and I was so happy for them and didn't want to take anything away from their bliss.

Being jealous of cis girls was an issue with me as a teenager. I remember being with a girlfriend back then and she was composing saying that it sucked to be a girl and wishing that I could trade places with her.

As corny as it sounds, I'm not envious of the cis gendered world because being trans has shaped my life tremendously. Not just in a hardship way. It has shaped how I see life, what is important, and has made me persevere. I don't know if my life or soul would be as colorful if I wasn't trans.

Quote from: Simon on January 21, 2013, 10:53:58 PM
As corny as it sounds, I'm not envious of the cis gendered world because being trans has shaped my life tremendously. Not just in a hardship way. It has shaped how I see life, what is important, and has made me persevere. I don't know if my life or soul would be as colorful if I wasn't trans.

Yeah what Simon says! I always wanted to say that lol. I agree that the circumstances of my life have made me into a more interesting and exciting person. I wouldn't trade places with a genetic female for all the tea in china, because it takes away from my uniqueness.

Pre transition yes I did, It became worse and worse the more I put off transition at first I would envy average/good looking Cis-women Then as my dysphoria got worse I'd envy ANY woman even those clearly suffering with severe health conditions, eventually it became so extreme I envied androygnous looking males until eventually I would envy obese men simply because they got to have boobs and couldn't see there penis and I didn't.

If it isn't obvious if we have a cardinal vice that we're all attuned to mine would be envy.

Quote from: Venus-Castina on January 22, 2013, 08:35:14 AM
I'm not really jealous on ciswomen because I accept that being one was never an option. I am however terribly jealous on transgirls who were able to start transition at a younger age than I did. I feel I have failed miserably because waiting so long to transition kind of ruined my chances on passing and ever being treated like a normal person. I'm also afraid that because of this I will always experience some amount of gender dysphoria. Looking at those perfectly passable young transitioners then makes me feel very depressed.

Sorry to hear that hun I don't know if this is any consolation to you but that envy doesn't go away even if you are a younger transwoman. You still have to wrestle against that part of you who had it "easier" or "better" than you did.

Yeah I feel jealousy. I also haven't transitioned physically yet though, so I hope the reasons for feeling jealous get better.

I tend to be less jealous of cis people and more of people who transition early on. I was an early bloomer so I doubt there was anything that could be done for me though; at age thirteen or fourteen is when I began identifying as male, but by then I was already very developed.

Quote from: Fat Admin on January 21, 2013, 10:50:40 AM
Good point there. Being born cis wouldn't guarantee happiness. And cis women also have horrible body image. Every teenage girl thinks she's too fat. Really if born cis, you'd probably be just obsessing over different body parts.

I think that might be a hormone thing. I completely obsess over different body parts and think I'm fat when everybody tells me I'm not. I've noticed it's gotten worse since I've been on HRT.