Okay, I want to save money, so I decided to buy clothing at thrift stores instead of Sears. In Sears, there's so much anonymity since it's a big store and people aren't around.

On the other hand, thrift stores are tiny and personal! I went to one today, and some other girls walked in at the EXACT SAME TIME! 

Needless to say, I chickened out and bolted, despite the employee being the most bubbly and delightful lady in the world, even down to the squeaky voice.

Anywho, I'm rambling, so my point is that I need tips on how to be brave in thrift stores. 

Are you out to any girls?  Ask them about coming along, so then people will think that they dragged you in there!  Plus, you can get their opinion about what would look good.

I am, but then how am I supposed to try anything on? It will be so obvious if I were to go into a fitting room with her. Plus, she's always busy. 

You just got to learn to tune people out. Imagine your the only one in there shopping. You could also wear headphones and just focus on the music. Music helped me through nervousness when started presenting as myself.

Let's think about this a minute.  Women go into thrift stores and buy clothes for their guys, and no one says a word.  So why would it be any different for an MtF, in boy mode, to buy things for 'their girl'.  OK, so 'their girl' is really themselves, but no one knows that.

Thrift stores are in the business of making money, and I have never seen anyone say anything to some one who was buying opposite gender clothing.

Quote from: Heather on February 20, 2013, 05:05:46 PM
You just got to learn to tune people out. Imagine your the only one in there shopping. You could also wear headphones and just focus on the music. Music helped me through nervousness when started presenting as myself.

Alright, but if the aforementioned lady talks to me, what do I do? 

Quote from: Ms. OBrien VT on February 20, 2013, 05:14:56 PM
Let's think about this a minute.  Women go into thrift stores and buy clothes for their guys, and no one says a word.  So why would it be any different for an MtF, in boy mode, to buy things for 'their girl'.  OK, so 'their girl' is really themselves, but no one knows that.

Thrift stores are in the business of making money, and I have never seen anyone say anything to some one who was buying opposite gender clothing.

Well, I can't say that I'm buying something for my sister or something, because I have to try the stuff on. It's just so... GRAH! 

As with what Ms. OBrien said, these stores are in it for the money and any employee that values their jobs, especially in clothing stores where commission is involved, would be respectful and helpful no matter who you are buying those clothes for.

It is hard for me to buy female clothing in any store and I've only bought bras and panties, some nail accessories, and waxing stuff. My wife has an issue with me wearing feminine clothing but not so much with underwear, nails or waxing. Of course my situation is a little bit different than most I think(I could be wrong lol). But if I had the freedom to wear whatever I wanted at home and not have to worry about starting a fight or trying to explain it to the kids I would find a few girls that I'm out to, probably my closest sister, and we would go shopping wherever and basically have a make-over day to let out the woman in me that's been hiding for so long. For me, at the moment, there are just to many variables with negative consequences for me personally to go that far with it.

I think that the biggest hurdle to get over is yourself being okay with who you are rather than worrying whether people will accept you or not. Once you get past yourself then you gain the courage to face the world as who you are. I'm still working on getting past the first step as well as others.

Don't know if it works for you, but it's helped me:

Being trans is no shame. Walk in as a proud transgender woman buying clothes for yourself. If anyone gives you a funny look, just smile at them. If anyone asks you, say "I'm transgender. It's for me," in a confident tone. Tell yourself you have just as much right to be there as any other woman. You don't need to "earn" the right to shop for woman's clothes by going full-time or becoming passable.

Quote from: DianaP on February 20, 2013, 05:01:01 PM
I am, but then how am I supposed to try anything on? It will be so obvious if I were to go into a fitting room with her. Plus, she's always busy. 

The technique I used when shopping in department stores and making use of the dressing room was to cover up your armload of clothes with some male item like a giant sized pair of pants.

As others have said, for the most part you will be totally unnoticed. Especially if no one has to unlock the dressing room door for you

Diana,
I worked in a thrift store and most of the time they don't have male and female dressing rooms but just one or two unisex rooms.
They really don't cared what gender the clothing is that a person takes in to a dressing room. In fact most of the time us store employees didn't even notice what was taken into the room. Last we would not say about the clothing you buy. We didn't want to offend or customers.
I have also done allot of shopping in thrift stores in the passed in male and gender neutral clothing and have never had a problem.
Yes, I was shy at first but quickly found out that it was easy, inexpensive, and no one noticed or even cared what I bought.
Hope this encourages you girl.
Hugs,
Jillieann

Well, I've learned a few things:

-It's all about the money.
-I'm my own worst enemy.
-If people don't like that I'm trans, that's too bad for them.
-Be a sleuth (except, for some reason, thrift stores around here down have male selections. )
-Thrift store workers don't care.

I feel better. Thanks, everybody!

Quote from: DianaP on February 20, 2013, 05:30:09 PM
Alright, but if the aforementioned lady talks to me, what do I do? 

Well, I can't say that I'm buying something for my sister or something, because I have to try the stuff on. It's just so... GRAH! 

You could do like I did last week. When a cashier asked me who I was buying shoes for and I said there for me! But normally most people don't say anything. Your like I used to be you put more thought into this than needs to be. Don't worry so much nobody really cares what your buying.

if you are nervous about shopping in real life, then you should try ebay

Early on I went to a thrift store and picked out some items. I was a little nervous, but i kept going.  I went to the checkout counter with an armload of obviously female clothes and some bright red heels. The lady behind the counter just said "nice shoes" with a smile. The thrift store people have seen it all and you will not shock them.

Another time i went to a major retail store and picked out an entire ensemble.  I did have to avoid strange looks from women while shopping in the women's section (but who cares), and when i got to the checkout of course there was a young female cashier. Oh well, in for a dime in for a dollar, so i plopped my stuff on the counter and smiled. She smiled too, we completed the sale, and i left.

Part of shopping for female stuff in male mode is attitude. YOU are perfectly entitled to buy ANYTHING in the store. Period.

Hey I'm a guy so I know it's much harder for you gals, but I like thrift stores. It's easier to shop across the store and nobody cares. You save lots of money and can get nice stuff. No thrift stores I know of have gendered changing rooms. There are the however many they have on one end of the store. You and a girl friend can use adjoining changing booths. (Though most of them are too busy to hold them.) Most of them are too small for two people anyway.

Transition is so expensive, it's nice to save where you can.

--Jay

Quote from: Annah on February 20, 2013, 10:11:55 PM
if you are nervous about shopping in real life, then you should try ebay

Thanks, but it sounds like a hassle. I like to try on my clothing beforehand. Ebay's for workout gear and video games. 

Quote from: riven1 on February 20, 2013, 10:15:17 PM
Part of shopping for female stuff in male mode is attitude. YOU are perfectly entitled to buy ANYTHING in the store. Period.

Fierce! Anywho, I once had some looks from women, and I came up with a tactic to kill those looks. I established eye contact and opened my eyes really wide, never losing eye contact. They back off. 

Quote from: aleon515 on February 20, 2013, 10:20:57 PM
Hey I'm a guy so I know it's much harder for you gals

You're still welcome to place input. 

As someone said, they rarely have gendered changing rooms which is a big plus.

On another note, seriously, you are likely one of the most normal people that will be in the store. It is highly unlikely anyone will bat an eye at the clothing you're choosing or the section you're in, even if you don't feel confident in presenting as female yet. Thrift stores are where people go to get costumes for theatre productions, to try outlandish fashion choices, so on and so forth...and some people, again, are just downright strange and crazy-looking. You'll look normal in comparison no matter what you do.

I love thrift shops. You can find all sorts of great stuff in them.
You can probably cut at least some of the time you're looking through the racks by knowing your size/measuring ahead of time. It won't always equal a perfect fit, but at least you'll be starting in the right area. I know skirt sizes are equal to one half of your waist measurement.

Quote from: DianaP on February 20, 2013, 07:03:13 PM
Well, I've learned a few things:

-It's all about the money.
-I'm my own worst enemy.
-If people don't like that I'm trans, that's too bad for them.
-Be a sleuth (except, for some reason, thrift stores around here down have male selections. )
-Thrift store workers don't care.

I feel better. Thanks, everybody!

If my time as a retail drone has taught me anything, it's that most people working retail don't care :p So long as you're not asking any of the people there for fitting advice, most of them won't be paying attention.

Also, avoid Salvation Army. Not to say christians are bad, but since it is a mostly christian charity, there's a greater chance you'll run into people who will judge you for being trans. My $.02

Quote from: DianaP on February 20, 2013, 10:24:09 PM
Thanks, but it sounds like a hassle. I like to try on my clothing beforehand. Ebay's for workout gear and video games. 

if you know your size it's not a hassle.

I got three skirts new with tags for 99 cents total (free shipping). Each skirt was valued at 35 dollars and they had just come out.

I got a 200 dollar dress brand new with tags for 10.99 with the shipping included.

Three pair of jeans valued at 180.00 dollars for 25.00 plus 6 dollars shipping new with tags

Three sweaters valued at 65.00 dollars each. I got for 5.00 a piece...new with tags.

Everything I get on ebay is always about 75% cheaper than thrift stores.

Personally, I would never buy video games on ebay because of DRM. 90% of all games have DRM now and the CD keys are usually good up to 5 times.