Dana Beyer
Executive Director, Gender Rights Maryland

The Ethics of Gender Transition
Posted: 02/12/2013 3:11 pm

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dana-beyer/the-ethics-of-gender-tran_b_2666438.html

Last month, following blogosphere chatter about the impact of transition on spouses, I posted about my own transition and its impact on my family. I said that it's important to hear both sides of this story, particularly as the process of transition interacts with the evolution of the structure of the American family, marriage equality, and our understand of gender. This leads to fascinating debate on very many levels, from many perspectives.

Last week "The Ethicist" in The New York Times posted a question and response on this very issue. I'd like to say that preventing this pain and suffering is why I, and so many other activists, do our work -- so that the next generation can become themselves early enough in their lives that there will be no such collateral damage downstream. It's sobering for me to reflect on the reality that women like me, with my life experiences, will, in all likelihood, no longer exist in two generations. That's a good thing, on balance.

We should step back a moment and recognize that this column would never have been published a decade ago, let alone two. In that respect it marks significant cultural progress. Twenty years ago trans parents almost always got divorced, lost custody of and, many times, any access to their children. Until a decade ago divorce was a prerequisite for genital reconstruction.

Yea, from what I read in this article, I would also be very miserable being a man (not of my real gender) even if I were rich with a nice family and career. Sitting at my lonely desk behind closed doors crying right after a family reunion or party.

That's a beautiful article. I really do wonder how things will be when I'm thirty or forty. still decades off to be sure and much can happen then, but hopefully we can keep this momentum up and keep moving forward.