"Wow... you really do look like one of those wild southern-Cal rockers in the "pre" pictures. And might I say, WOW, what a transformation! I love your hair in all of the pictures, and you're looking fabulous! And I loved the song! Keep up the great work! I really loved some of the other songs that were on that same Youtube page also... are those your songs too?" Cheetaking
Thank you, thank you, thank you, Carrie. I was 41 in the first photo, 56 in the second and the last one was taken last week at 58. And yes, anything with "christojihad2" on it is one of my songs. There are 27 uploaded on youtube I wrote and performed. All of the ones where I was playing live where you can see me playing I was almost certainly drunk and weighed between 225-230. I keep talking about my former weight because I was always thin and wirey like the first photo until my knee replacement and getting the MRSA staph infection in March 2000. It was such a virulent infection they nearly amputated my leg because of it. I went through four more terrible surgeries where they had to physically dig the infection out of my knee and I was in the hospital for 25 more days. My depression over it and the fact that it never healed right was complicated by unbelievable pain and my inability to play sports anymore, my only defense against my transsexuality. I'd always thought I'd eventually transition, but after the surgeries and weight gain I thought it was too late at 45 to transition caused me to attempt suicide three different times, the last one on July 12th, 2011. God, how wrong I was! 45 is young, and so is 58 in a way. I'm finally, finally becoming who I've always been inside. Carrie, please listen to any of my songs on youtube if you like "Refugee". Listen to "The Devil Rides (in a limousine)", "Ice Cream Headache", "If You Really Love Me", "For My Sin", "It's Endless", "Don't Let It (get you down)", "Politicians", "Man Against Man" and "Food Riot". I'm not necessarily unhappy with any of the other songs I have on youtube, but seven or eight are just me singing and on acoustic guitar, no bass, drums, harmonies, lead guitar, harmonies or anything. I was writing a lot of music at the time and was often writing so much I put them on tape just so I wouldn't forget them. I was living a total lie and I knew it, so I wrote some of my songs in stealth, and never didn't know who I am, ever. Anyway, Carrie, thank you for your wonderful compliments on my new looks and "Refugee." Hugs, Mira