Is anyone else here obsessive compulsive and trans*? Did your OCD issues ever give you any doubts as to who you were gender wise? If they did, how did you deal with those doubts?

I can't say that I have experienced this? I'm OCD in some senses (like certain things have to go a certain way) but not when it's come to being trans. Or well not yet at least lol.

Btw love Tenchi, that show is awesome.

Quote from: ChrisJ on April 14, 2013, 09:55:53 AM
Is anyone else here obsessive compulsive and trans*? Did your OCD issues ever give you any doubts as to who you were gender wise? If they did, how did you deal with those doubts?

I'm not diagnosed as OCD but I have some of the tendencies.

I don't know if you've seen some of my posts recently...but most of them involve me doubting that I'm trans because I didn't do/wasn't [insert x reason].

Yeah, I have a ton of self doubt and self questioning...considering that I thought that I was gay, and then I thought I had Aspergers. So I pretty much just don't trust myself anymore...

It's gotten so bad that its almost like self denial, I know it's there, but I can't accept it because I can't trust my own judgement. Not do I want I transition because I don't want to make a mistake and have to reverse it...ughhhh

I'll keep you posted if I come up with something that helps me...but in the meantime...woot self doubt/self hate.

-Skye

I think everyone is OCD in the same way some of us are fatter than others hehe.

I do tend to obsess about things some days, and then some days something keeps me too distracted to spend the time obsessing.

I have had doubts about my self, in the beginning, but that makes sense. I question anything to a point.

I spent several years accepting I had fybromyalgia too. It was a large shift in my life at the time after all.

The best way to deal with doubts is to attack the subject from multiple angles and multiple sources, pretty much the way proper research is done.

I've had OCD for years,I have to do things a certain way and forever checking doors

I don't think it's related to being trans but I probably am OCD. I'm a hand washer. At my worst my hands were red, dry, cracked, and bleeding around the knuckles pretty much constantly. I've since invested in some good hand lotion and tried to do as much as possible between washings to limit the amount of soap/paper towels I use. I'm down to about a roll a day and now recycle them so it isn't quite as wasteful. I also only do this at home and in the car so... Maybe those things are somehow related.

I also have a very strong compulsion to do everything in a certain order and choose a certain item from each group, but I fight that and often do the exact opposite to keep it from getting worse. I turn into a mess when this gets the best of me. If things aren't better by the end of the year, I'm going to look for help with it. I've been doing this for almost 6 years and it needs to disappear.

Quote from: ChrisJ on April 14, 2013, 11:12:51 AM


Yeah I feel similarly. I told my mom the other day about my gender questioning and she ended up bringing my obsessive nature. Maybe I just thought this was a big deal because I obsess over things like crazy when they catch my attention. I cant say she's wrong about that so Im worried. I was wondering if anyone else had OCD or similar and had gender issues...

Lets assume this condition does exist and you have it.

It will the the stupidest decision you will ever make if you allow yourself to even entertain the thought that it is guiding your thoughts or making you think anything.

I have worked with patients suffering from the psychotic version of that condition. Those people were ill. They had no insight at all and many needed hospitalization simply to survive.

But even they would never have adopted such a profound notion as being transgender on a long term basis. At the most, it might have been a passing obsession, lasting only a few hours. Probably until they fell asleep for a bit. Once their mind had cleared, they would have instantly realised the consequences and promptly let it go.

Now get a few ideas into your mind.

These conditions are very rare.

They are obvious and debilitating.

We all have various aspects of many serious psychotic conditions. I talk to myself for example. And I have a paranoia problem, especially under stress. It doesn't make me schizophrenic.

I worked for a while in a theatre where some pretty famous and successful artists put on shows. Believe me, these guys are obsessive. Once, I was literally chased out of the theatre by a very famous international singling star who had heard me refer to the audience as punters.

That is obsessive. It's a personality trait. One which they, for example, have used to make themselves very successful and rich.

They are not ill and neither are you.

Quote from: ChrisJ on April 14, 2013, 11:12:51 AM
Yeah I feel similarly. I told my mom the other day about my gender questioning and she ended up bringing my obsessive nature. Maybe I just thought this was a big deal because I obsess over things like crazy when they catch my attention. I cant say she's wrong about that so Im worried. I was wondering if anyone else had OCD or similar and had gender issues...

I do have a very similar problem as well.
I do have OCD, but not severely.

I came out when I was 16 and my parents were baffled. They didn't even expect me to be trans at all. They insist it is OCD and relate it to my old irrational fears as a child such as Murcury, Schitzofrenia, Acid, Ect. I am not scared or afraid of anything about being trans. I have told them from the day I came out that I was confidently a girl and know that I am a girl on the inside.

They also tend to jump over things like my depression(landed me in the mental hospital for suicide 4 months ago) and my eating disorder which according to them "Screwed up my testostrone levels.

It frustrates me and I can't get help to start transition because my psychiatrist also insists its all of these and my relationship with my dad that is causing the dysphoria.

I don't know what to do at all.

Quote from: Emenii on April 15, 2013, 11:04:44 PM

It frustrates me and I can't get help to start transition because my psychiatrist also insists its all of these and my relationship with my dad that is causing the dysphoria.

I don't know what to do at all.

Emenii, I encourage you to consider the possibility that this psychiatrist, while knowledgeable in his field, may not understand enough about transgender to advise you in an informed manner.

If you are transgender, and it sounds like you think you may be, your OCD, your depression, and your issues with your father could all go away and you would have gender dysphoria.

There are a lot of professionals the insist their patients deal with every other mental and physical problem in their lives before they start their transition.

IMO this opinion can be misguided and damaging. Every transgender person deserves to transition without delay to live as their true gender regardless of what other issues may be going on in their life.

Quote from: suzifrommd on April 16, 2013, 07:04:27 AM
Emenii, I encourage you to consider the possibility that this psychiatrist, while knowledgeable in his field, may not understand enough about transgender to advise you in an informed manner.

If you are transgender, and it sounds like you think you may be, your OCD, your depression, and your issues with your father could all go away and you would have gender dysphoria.

There are a lot of professionals the insist their patients deal with every other mental and physical problem in their lives before they start their transition.

IMO this opinion can be misguided and damaging. Every transgender person deserves to transition without delay to live as their true gender regardless of what other issues may be going on in their life.

Thanks you for the reply. I have already been treated for both my depression and OCD and have been placed on Klonopin and Abilify. I hate being on these drugs because they make me feel terrible.

To put it in a nutshell, I am stuck between a rock and a hard place.

I have never really had anxiety over being trans except for the thought of being a guy for the rest of my life terrifies me. I have been in treatment for my anxiety and depression for well over a year now and its almost like I can't go anywhere.

My perents are saying now that I need instant gratification with hormones/clothing/blockers/ect and I am just blown away

Quote from: Emenii on April 16, 2013, 07:42:16 AM
Thanks you for the reply. I have already been treated for both my depression and OCD and have been placed on Klonopin and Abilify. I hate being on these drugs because they make me feel terrible.

To put it in a nutshell, I am stuck between a rock and a hard place.

It sounds like a difficult position to be in. Give yourself credit for facing the hard decision of whether the treatment is worse than the disorder. I think that would increase anyone's anxiety.

Quote from: Emenii on April 16, 2013, 07:42:16 AM
I have never really had anxiety over being trans except for the thought of being a guy for the rest of my life terrifies me.

Yup. That could describe my life perfectly about six months ago. Of course, now that I've given myself a female name and started presenting as female in a whole range of settings, I've felt how perfectly "right" that feels. I know I can't go back.

Quote from: Emenii on April 16, 2013, 07:42:16 AM
My perents are saying now that I need instant gratification with hormones/clothing/blockers/ect and I am just blown away

Are you saying that your parents are supportive of a medical transition? If so, great news. Of course, it is 100% up to you how fast you want to go with this.

Could you ask them to help you find a therapist that's supportive and knowledgeable about transgender clients? Don't know if it will help, but the WPATH (World Professional Association for Transgender Health) has a website that lists WPATH certified therapists in various areas.

http://www.wpath.org/find_a_provider.cfm

I have never been diagnosed with OCD but I do find myself checking things over and over like making sure doors are locked and appliances unplugged. Also, I can't stand to feel dirty so I may shower twice a day. I don't mind getting dirty but it bothers me to stay that way very long. These OCD tendencies have never made me doubt about being trans though.

Quote from: suzifrommd on April 16, 2013, 08:29:22 AM
Are you saying that your parents are supportive of a medical transition? If so, great news. Of course, it is 100% up to you how fast you want to go with this.

Could you ask them to help you find a therapist that's supportive and knowledgeable about transgender clients? Don't know if it will help, but the WPATH (World Professional Association for Transgender Health) has a website that lists WPATH certified therapists in various areas.

http://www.wpath.org/find_a_provider.cfm

My parents are not at all supportive of me, they find every reason for me not to be trans.
I am so stuck right now.

I want to transition and start hrt as fast as possible

Quote from: Emenii on April 16, 2013, 06:55:57 PM
My parents are not at all supportive of me, they find every reason for me not to be trans.
I am so stuck right now.

I want to transition and start hrt as fast as possible

Oh, I misread what you meant about parents saying you need instant gratification. Sorry about that.

It may be that your parents can be educated. A lot of people don't know much about transgender (I didn't as recently as a year ago.) Certainly worth a try.

Try repeating some simple facts about Transgender. Sometimes if you hear something more than once, it makes it more likely you'll think about it. Facts like:

* We don't choose to be transgender.
* Transgender typically doesn't go away on its own.
* No one has found a way to cure transgender. The only effective treatment is living as the gender you identify with.
* Transgender is serious. If it is ignored or treatment is delayed, depression and suicide are common.
* Transgender people do best when the people around them accept and support them.

Probably works best if you say these things calmly and matter-of-factly, with as little resentment as you can. It may not work - some people have already made up their minds and don't want to be educated, but might be worth a try.

I really hope his helps.

I have schizoaffective disorder and OCD both, and they have nothing to do with my being transgender. Both illnesses are pretty much under control with medication, but I'm still body dysphoric. My therapist agrees that they're not related, thankfully.

Quote from: suzifrommd on April 16, 2013, 07:16:16 PM
Oh, I misread what you meant about parents saying you need instant gratification. Sorry about that.

It may be that your parents can be educated. A lot of people don't know much about transgender (I didn't as recently as a year ago.) Certainly worth a try.

Try repeating some simple facts about Transgender. Sometimes if you hear something more than once, it makes it more likely you'll think about it. Facts like:

* We don't choose to be transgender.
* Transgender typically doesn't go away on its own.
* No one has found a way to cure transgender. The only effective treatment is living as the gender you identify with.
* Transgender is serious. If it is ignored or treatment is delayed, depression and suicide are common.
* Transgender people do best when the people around them accept and support them.

Probably works best if you say these things calmly and matter-of-factly, with as little resentment as you can. It may not work - some people have already made up their minds and don't want to be educated, but might be worth a try.

I really hope his helps.

I can't get through to them or my psychiatrist(Not a Gender Therapist) at all.
Also GQ brought up Body Dyspmorphia; I have a terrible self image.
Mainly my hair is my problem because of Male Pattern Baldness starting and I HATE IT.
I got a prescription for Propecia month ago and my parents refused to give it to me because they thought I would use it as a replacement for HRT or something. Hair or no hair, I still want to be a girl terribly.

My psychiatrist ordered them to stop letting me have girl cloths and girly things such as makeup, ect. He even went as far as to have them firmly address me as their "son" all the time and it has driven me over the edge. I am doing my best to subdue my suicidal and negative thoughts.

I don't know if I actually have it, but my parents can make it seem like I have any type of mental illness except anything involving psychosis just to get me off this Gender Thing.

I always found that meditation helped when I was stuck in a spiralling loop of terror involving my parents. Find a sound that you can get lost in (white noise, running water etc.). Its a good stress releaver for most people.

I would slip away to a river, find a secluded perch and listen to the sound of my greatest fear crashing below me. I have this stupid irrational fear of water, and found peace in the sound of it. Something about my pain washing away with it. I thought it was pretty silly at first (i was 14 when I first started doing it) but after a while I noticed it helped! Im 22 now and still afraid of water, but meditating on the sounds helped me calm my mind and deal with ridiculing parents!

Is there any way to get out of seeing this therapist? Sounds like hes doing more pain than anything.

I wish you all the luck in the world with your dilema and wish there was more I could say to help some how.