Yeah, when you're read as male it's a nice feeling to drop all the angsty feelings that come with worrying about passing and just be yourself, people who I'm stealth to don't see anything different about me compared to that stereotype for cisguys. There is a "bro code" of sorts, not the one that people use as an excuse to be absolute tools but just a standard by which many males socialize. It's especially apparent in the high school scene, including the wrestling and all. Somehow I haven't been outed by any physical contact that comes with that territory, which is a nice boost to my ego.

And something else cool about being trans is that we can pick our own name that actually fits us. There's an electric thrill when I hear my name or when I get gendered properly, but of course, it wouldn't do to grin like a hyena every time that happened so I've learned to keep it to myself until I'm alone. Then I have a happy meltdown, like a 13 year old girl at a certain Canadian pop singer's concert except minus the ear-shattering screams and stuff. Generally, guys are just more chill about things, which is nice because I kind of balk when people freak out for seemingly no reason. Seriously, calm down XD

When you get seen as what you really are inside it's a good feeling, finally being able to socialize without fear and depression.

Admittedly, I'm the type of person who would have rather been born cisgender, personally. The only thing I would be scared is that I wouldn't be the same person. I mean, I like who I am, in general.

However, I think there is some good that comes about it. I feel a greater amount of empathy for people, and I'm certainly much less quick to judge because I know how it feels to be treated like you're less than human. I also know how awful it is to have a condition that's expensive to treat and requires a lot of jumping through hoops. If I was cis, I probably wouldn't have had such a deep understanding of why it's so important to fight discrimination and why it's important that everyone gets the ability to have medical treatment. Granted, being trans has also made me a bit cynical in some ways, but I like to think I'm usually better for it. But I can't deny that I've had a few moments where I kept thinking "At least you get to wake up every morning and see a body that matches your expectations, why are you whining about your problems?"

I also think that being trans has made me stronger as a person. Like many trans people, I was suicidal before my transition. I remember periods of time where I would lay down to go to bed and my mind would go over how many things in the house could be used to end my life. I had some really dark periods because I was so unhappy with my gender identity. But having gone past that and tackled those demons, it has made me much stronger. When something bad happens, I tend to deal with things better because I know that I've conquered much, much worse things.

I dunno, though. It's a hard question. I don't know how my life would have been if I wasn't trans. I could have had totally different experiences, so it's hard to say.

I feel like I know what women can be subjected to and go through, but only from an observational perspective. I'll never know what women really think because I'm not one. So it's a bit different. It's like I'm a very convincing guy in drag walking through life and no one else knows but me. And once you've experienced certain things and get a feel for how things work when society thinks you're female, then it gets pretty old. So it's not exactly a benefit.

Over the years I've noticed a lot less people give me crap if they see me as female but I dress or "act" male. I know there's still plenty of areas out there where this is a problem for people but the areas I've lived in the last 20 years it seems to have mellowed out.

It's better than being born with a degenerative or serious disease, etc. Someone else said that everyone has problems and struggles in life and I guess I'm just trying to say that I'm glad this is my problem and not some other things.