Once again, thanks to all the replies.
Quote from: Donna Elvira on May 11, 2013, 12:45:18 AM
Hi there young lady,
Are you by any chance a Scorpio ie. born between 21st Oct and 21st Nov ? I am not a great believer in astrology but the way you ask yourself more or less the same questions over and over points to the sort of anguished existence Scorpios are supposed to lead... 
Just kidding by the way, but reading this thread reminded me of a previous one to which I made the following contribution:
Hi,
Unless you have some obvious reason to imagine your mother and others close to you are intrinsically hostile to all those who do not quite correspond to standard gender models, you would seem to have everything to gain from coming out. For starters, you would be amazed at how good it feels to just stop hiding . No matter what you do afterwards, by dropping the mask you are opening up more space to be who you are. At minimum, you should be able to get away with lots of little things which probably have you worrying about being found out right now.
An even more optimistic scenario is that you encounter understanding and maybe even a helping hand. In families where bonds are strong, after the initial suprise, supposing there is one, it is probably the most frequent outcome.
You more or less agreed at the time, 26th April, and reading this I can't help but think that you would make life dramatically easier for yourself by doing so, with very very little to lose compared to what you could gain.
Wishing you all the best.
Bises
Donna
Actually, I'm an aquarius
I think you are right. I just need to get over my fear. After all, it's not like I can really avoid it.
Quote from: summerbreeze on May 11, 2013, 07:52:22 AM
Tell you what young Lady...Regarding age, I could probably be your mother. Can you imagine how much I am regretting that I was hiding way too long? I should have done back then what YOU should do now, and YOU should not repeat the mistake I made back then.
During recovery after SRS, I was talking pretty much intensively with one gorgeous Lady from Hong Kong in her 30s, successful in her job. She looked so pretty, so very feminine, there was nothing male in her. But suddenly she was telling me...
I don't know how to tell it my mother!
She was possibly a 100% Female with the exception of her chromosomes, she looked very female and only female, she had undergone SRS...but her mother didn't have any idea of all this. 
This was the biggest problem for the Lady.
And I told her...Hey, there isn't anything male in you. You are obviously a Female. And now you had SRS, you're done. It cannot be that difficult to talk to your mother. When she is a loving mother who loves her child, she MUST have seen the girl in her child before. She cannot have been blind. Most of the time, it is social education which makes people speechless when they should talk. But a mother usually feels what's going on. And if your mother never felt anything about gender trouble, she never felt anything for you. She instinctively knows that you always have been a girl, or she never cared for you.
And you, dear young Lady, it's in my opinion the same. I don't know you. Not at all, and I've never seen you. But here online, you are coming over as the spirit of a girl. It's a girl typing your words online.
If your mother cares for you, she already has a feeling, but she cannot put it into words. Maybe society made also her speechless. But you must talk. Because if you don't...THAT will set you back from transitioning.
Because it's a hit-or-miss situation, your mother will either be with you and by your side, or she won't.
YOU CAN ONLY WIN.
I have been meeting with several mothers who were accompanying their daughters to SRS and holding the hand of her daughter and caressing away the post-op pain. There is also such a chance for yourself.
But if your mother doesn't support you - Move on with YOUR Life because it is YOUR Life and not the life of your mother. That simple, even if it hurts. You can only win when coming out. The first cut is the deepest. But you will lose if you don't.
Heaps of hugs.
Thank you for this post. In the end, I know that you are right.
I am going to start the process first, but will come out sooner than later. Once I feel comfortable, I will come out. I am just hoping it will go well. In the meantime, I will start looking up tips on how to successfully come out.
