Hi there, I'm new!

Basically my question is this... What can you use a non-legal name for in the US? I'm not in any position to do a court order, but every time I do a search about it, that's all I wind up getting that's of any remote use. Do I need to use my legal name for any sort of legally binding agreement? What IS a legally binding agreement in this case? (Everything I will ever sign?) How do I navigate the workplace with a "nickname" in mind? Is a non-legal name basically only good for Starbucks coffee and restaurant reservations?

Hi Lo, welcome to Susan's Place!  I'm not sure what you mean, but yeah, a non legal name probably doesn't get you very far. See you around the site, hugs, Devlyn

Everyone I know calls me by Lance. This is not yet my legal name, but I rarely have problems with it. The only thing that really sucks is legal stuff, like having a car in your name or getting a new job. All of the higher ups have to know your birth name. But all of my coworkers aren't concerned with it, so they call me what I ask them to. So a chosen name is good for a lot of things. The only sucky part is things where you absolutely have to use your legal name.

@Devlyn: Thanks!

@Lance: I guess it's really just a trial and error thing, huh?

In a way, yeah. But you have to be firm when telling people what you want to go by and what pronouns you want them to use. It also helps to look the part as well.

I'm nonbinary (agender), so there is no looking the part for me. :T

The bonus is that I don't want to change the way my name is pronounced since it very commonly goes either way, but I want to change it to the masculine spelling since I think that's a good middle-ground. (idk I'm turning this into a very decidedly nonbinary political statement or something haha). I'm pretty sure I'd be interested in getting it legally changed in the future, but I just can't right now as I'm going through immigration and doing all of that in the middle of things would be the dumbest idea ever.

I guess a little confidence, and a little bit of being annoying/pretentious when I correct folks on spelling is all it should take...

99% of the time, going by your name rather than your legal name shouldn't be an issue. However, anything that is legal or contractual should be filled out and signed with your legal name to prevent unforeseen future issues. Let's say you sign a lease agreement somewhere and the place turns out to be run by a bigot. So he finds out that's not your legal name and says you have no right to stay because you didn't correctly fill out the lease. I know this is a really crappy example - I'm not an example expert - but I think you can kind of catch what I'm saying. It can only create legal headaches for someone in the future.

Your non-legal name isn't just for coffee joints and reservations. Rarely do I ever have to utter or sign the old name, so it's really almost a non-issue. Plus, in most situations where you have to use your legal name, the person assisting you is going to be respectful.

Quote from: Lo on June 27, 2013, 11:55:58 AM
I'm nonbinary (agender), so there is no looking the part for me. :T

The bonus is that I don't want to change the way my name is pronounced since it very commonly goes either way, but I want to change it to the masculine spelling since I think that's a good middle-ground. (idk I'm turning this into a very decidedly nonbinary political statement or something haha). I'm pretty sure I'd be interested in getting it legally changed in the future, but I just can't right now as I'm going through immigration and doing all of that in the middle of things would be the dumbest idea ever.

I guess a little confidence, and a little bit of being annoying/pretentious when I correct folks on spelling is all it should take...

+1for that!

@Michelle: Thanks! That's what I was hoping to hear... the world is a complicated place to navigate anymore and I just get nervous about things like this I suppose!

@Devlyn: :3

Know someone who paid his $250 to change 2 letters of his name. Says he'd do it all over again in a heartbeat.

--Jay