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how do ftm feel about mtf?

Started by adison, July 01, 2013, 12:50:34 AM

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adison

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Adam (birkin)

My best friend is MTF. :) Although, I'd feel the same about her if she was cis. She's just been there for the majority of my transition, and she's gotten to see my highs and lows, and because she has been through them herself, she is able to really understand how much these things mean to me and how far I have come.
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Sammy

This one is very sweet and cute :)

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Darkflame

Back when I was 13 or so, I used to go to this youth group for lgbt kids (at the time I was identifying as L) and made friends with two trans girls. I also had a massive crush on one of them  ;) And really what struck me most even at that age was how they were just normal girls who happened to have male bodies.

At a time when I was convinced I just needed to try harder and I would feel like a girl, it was eye opening to see that the way we express gender really does show in all the little ways and isn't changeable. They were my first real exposure to trans life beyond the sob stories you see on talk shows and I don't know if I would've had the courage to come out if I hadn't seen them transition. Well it would've taken me longer at least. 

Basically, I have nothing but respect and admiration for mtf ladies :)
If I let where I'm from burn I can never return

"May those who accept their fate find happiness, those who defy it, glory"
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Keaira

Quote from: Prof HB on July 01, 2013, 02:04:52 AM
My best friend is MTF. :) Although, I'd feel the same about her if she was cis. She's just been there for the majority of my transition, and she's gotten to see my highs and lows, and because she has been through them herself, she is able to really understand how much these things mean to me and how far I have come.
I feel the same way. Yes, im a bit further ahead, but, most of the problems Caleb has faced, I have too. He is an amazing guy. Having him here in Indiana was one of the best weeks of my life. He just fit right in like he was meant to be a part of my life. And for the first time ever, I have a friend I trust completely who understands me.
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AdamMLP

I don't think anything... they're just people.  The only emotion I can recall being sparked by trans women as a collective group of people was irritation at their typing style, which is exactly the same irritation I get when I read status updates from cis women on facebook.  Then it makes me realise just how deep being trans goes, and it's comforting to know it's in our subconsciousness and not just our heads.
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Joanna Dark

Quote from: AlexanderC on July 01, 2013, 04:55:38 PM
I don't think anything... they're just people.  The only emotion I can recall being sparked by trans women as a collective group of people was irritation at their typing style, which is exactly the same irritation I get when I read status updates from cis women on facebook.  Then it makes me realise just how deep being trans goes, and it's comforting to know it's in our subconsciousness and not just our heads.

What  typing style? I'm curious...
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Sammy

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Darrin Scott

Not that I mind or anything, but these threads seem to pop up a lot for some reason.





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ChrisRokk

Eh, I am in the "I don't care about anyone's gender identity" camp.  You can't really lump all mtf individuals into a group.  It seems like it would be kind of sexist to make assumptions about all women, trans or cis. 

I do have one friend who is mtf.
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AdamMLP

Quote from: Joanna Dark on July 01, 2013, 05:11:15 PM
What  typing style? I'm curious...
Quote from: Sammy on July 01, 2013, 05:12:51 PM
Me too :) I wanna know :)

I've never been able to quite put my finger on it... there's just a subtle difference between men and women that I've noticed when reading things they've written informally on the internet.  Maybe it's that women tend to write a little less formally than men, even when not required to, throw in more smilies and exclamation marks and maybe you'd be getting somewhere close... it's more subtle than that though and I can't pinpoint it precisely.

Honestly, if I knew exactly what it was I'd have made a thread talking about it, because I find it as interesting as the next person.  Give me two years and I might be able to tell you the answer.
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Sammy

/makes mental note/ Need moar exclamation marks!!! Yay :) !!!11!
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Simon

How do I feel about transwomen?

That's a vague question. I guess I feel about them like I would any other woman except for one thing. Since they're also trans there is a deeper level of understanding between us and them, (versus with a cis female) I would assume. I'm sure that's not apparent in every situation but generally speaking I would think it would be the case.

I think they're brave, strong, and unique women.
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xchristine

Quote from: AlexanderC on July 01, 2013, 05:58:26 PM
I've never been able to quite put my finger on it... there's just a subtle difference between men and women that I've noticed when reading things they've written informally on the internet.  Maybe it's that women tend to write a little less formally than men, even when not required to, throw in more smilies and exclamation marks and maybe you'd be getting somewhere close... it's more subtle than that though and I can't pinpoint it precisely.

Honestly, if I knew exactly what it was I'd have made a thread talking about it, because I find it as interesting as the next person.  Give me two years and I might be able to tell you the answer.

As usual the boys don't understand how we comunicate
Its kind of cute to me :-)

On the flip side ....reading ftm..is um. Dry to the point
Cold edgy...

The opposite of what we are
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Bookworm

Quote from: AlexanderC on July 01, 2013, 05:58:26 PM
I've never been able to quite put my finger on it... there's just a subtle difference between men and women that I've noticed when reading things they've written informally on the internet.  Maybe it's that women tend to write a little less formally than men, even when not required to, throw in more smilies and exclamation marks and maybe you'd be getting somewhere close... it's more subtle than that though and I can't pinpoint it precisely.

Honestly, if I knew exactly what it was I'd have made a thread talking about it, because I find it as interesting as the next person.  Give me two years and I might be able to tell you the answer.

I kinda sorta understand where you are going with this. I have friends of both genders and when I read the posts I can generally figure out if it is a guy or a girl. This makes me wonder though what my typing says about me.

-shrug-
who knows.
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jossef-ftm

i would absolutely date a mtf for 3 reasons-1 they r beautiful 2- they can 100% understand you i mean we have the same problem (gender) 3-they r more girly than cis womens and i find that so amazing
Sometimes, it's hard to find words to tell you how much you mean to me. A lot of times, I don't say anything at all. But I hope someday, you'll understand, having you is what I live for...(I Love you my Queen )
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Joanna Dark

Quote from: AlexanderC on July 01, 2013, 05:58:26 PM
I've never been able to quite put my finger on it... there's just a subtle difference between men and women that I've noticed when reading things they've written informally on the internet.  Maybe it's that women tend to write a little less formally than men, even when not required to, throw in more smilies and exclamation marks and maybe you'd be getting somewhere close... it's more subtle than that though and I can't pinpoint it precisely.

Honestly, if I knew exactly what it was I'd have made a thread talking about it, because I find it as interesting as the next person.  Give me two years and I might be able to tell you the answer.

It's funny you should mention exclamation points. I am a magazine editor so I used to hatehatehate exclamation points because I saw them as lazy and someone using a crutch to get their point across. But lately I can't help myself at all! Prolly because i'm loads more enthusiastic about life. But I've always used smiley faces. Lots of em. hehehe ;D
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Shantel

Quote from: Simon on July 01, 2013, 06:29:48 PM
How do I feel about transwomen?

That's a vague question. I guess I feel about them like I would any other woman except for one thing. Since they're also trans there is a deeper level of understanding between us and them, (versus with a cis female) I would assume. I'm sure that's not apparent in every situation but generally speaking I would think it would be the case.

I think they're brave, strong, and unique women.

Simon,
      I think that yours and jossef-ftm's comments are really nice and kind of uplifting, I've often felt the same way about FtM's but I've noticed that generally when I complement someone or say something nice to someone on an FtM thread it get's totally ignored as if someone had farted in a crowded elevator. I know it's not my problem and that it's theirs because I've always been very accepting of FtM comments on MtF threads and find them valuable input at times because I realize that they had lived a portion of their lives as females albeit dysphoric and they should know what they're talking about. Meanwhile that idea is a two way street, I lived the first 50 years of my life as a rather very manly male and sure know what I'm talking about if I say that you look good and are hitting on masculinity in your photos. Hope people will be big enough to acknowledge a complement from someone well versed in what masculinity is all about.
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BunnyBee

I hear a lot of people talking about how they hate exclamation points, and can you guess their typical gender ??  ::)  I know most writing style guides will look down on them, but I'm sorry, they work great for expression!  I kind of get annoyed by that opinion and I think people that hate exclamation points should rethink!!  ! !!!!!!!!   !!  !

But I agree there is more to the differences between male an female writing than that, Alexander, but it's hard for me to figure out them out too.  I can always tell the sex of writers though. I am always impressed when a man can write a woman so she sounds like a woman, it really is that rare!

If I were to try to boil the differences down I would say that women typically think about people where guys typically think about things, and that shapes how they use language.  I think you will see a lot of personal pronouns with women (I, you, she,) where with men you will see lots of words that describe things (the, that, it.)  I think this just scratches the surface, but that is a place to start?  Obviously I'm generalizing and talking about how people write and think ON AVERAGE, I don't mean everybody fits a mold.
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dpadgett628

Quote from: Simon on July 01, 2013, 06:29:48 PM
How do I feel about transwomen?

That's a vague question. I guess I feel about them like I would any other woman except for one thing. Since they're also trans there is a deeper level of understanding between us and them, (versus with a cis female) I would assume. I'm sure that's not apparent in every situation but generally speaking I would think it would be the case.

I think they're brave, strong, and unique women.

I agree with this completely. Transwomen are the same as any other woman. But I do agree that there is the connection that transmen and transwomen have just from understanding what it is like to be trans. It is very hard to explain sometimes to someone who is a cis individual just how hard it can be and what it is like.

Quote from: jossef-ftm on July 01, 2013, 07:02:14 PM
i would absolutely date a mtf for 3 reasons-1 they r beautiful 2- they can 100% understand you i mean we have the same problem (gender) 3-they r more girly than cis womens and i find that so amazing

I agree mostly with this too, even if it does seem flirtatious  ;) I have noticed that the majority of transwomen are extremely girly and feminine more so than cis women (while not true in all cases, just something I've noticed). I personally find it amazing how comfortably they can express their femininity yet still be modest about it. And of course there is the beauty that comes along with their looks as well as their minds :3
"The future I'm living now, is not what I'd thought it'd be. The person I was before, is nothing like me. The future I'm living now, is the way I want it to be." -Sick Puppies

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