I figured I'd better introduce myself before I start poking around the forums here.
I have a bit of a unique situation in that I am both intersex and a ftm transperson. I have been fighting the urge to transition since my college days and spent 2 years in therapy trying to repress my true gender. I was (and still am) a Christian and I once belonged to a quasi-liberal church that I thought would accept my decision to transition. I am uncertain of this, so I have stopped attending for the time being.
The past 2 years since I've stopped therapy I've been back and forth on the "To transition or not to transition" thing. I was raised female and have (for the most part) a female body. My condition (CAH) wasn't diagnosed until I was a teenager due to it not being as severe as most cases. I entered a second (male) puberty during my 20s. It has been a very slow process and I'm ok with that so far.
However, since I was trying to pass as female and live as a woman full-time, I was always ashamed of myself and felt disgusting because I could never really be my real self with anyone. I have become increasingly reclusive over the years. I've also suffered from severe depression for a long time.
I waffled and wavered about transitioning over the years and I've finally decided that I am going to continue on the road to transitioning to live as a male. I can't live as a woman anymore. Right now, I am finishing up school (taking summer courses) and planning to sit for my industry certification exams in the fall. After that, I will be getting a better paying job and can begin my transition in earnest.
I love metal music, manga, cooking and writing. I am a huge bookworm as well. Basically, a big nerd. I currently live in the Midwest and spend way too much time online.
