So I want a baby but I have to wait 15-20 months until I'm better and competent enough to be a mom. Does anyone have any advice or things I should try to start learning or practicing? Aside from that one problem I do great and I have been working very hard to get that food thing and now understand that food is needed so once I pass that test I think I will be fine. I just have to start learning things I might need to know about being a parent

I don't think anyone is ever really ready to be a parent. There are plenty of people who become parents who were not prepared and did great at it. the fact you are willing and want to work at being better prepared makes me think you are prolly ready right now.

Take a first aid/cpr course. They'll teach you how to give cpr and Heimlich to a baby and toddler. Hope you'll never have to use it, but its valuable knowledge.


edit: fix typo

Parenting is the ultimate test of Your patience... 🙂

Mothering instinct is natural with in us all
It will come out when the time is right

And tristan I'm kinda curious ad to what problem
It's you are dealing with??
Like what are you becoming better from?

There are often free parenting classes through social services or city services, sometimes even at hospitals. If they wonder why now, telling them you want to be prepared for a newborn. Its the truth just a bit earlier than most.

As someone who rather suddenly found herself the parent to a 9yo and a 26yo, I've found a certain instinct kicks in. I'm far from a perfect parent, but I'm working on it..

There are only two things you need to know.

You will never feel like you know what you are doing, unless

Someone tries to tell you how to do it at which point you discover, never tell someone how to raise their kids.

Good luck, get lots of sleep, and remember, the child will never be anything other than what you raise, so, if in 18 years you hate the person, hey, YOU raised that person, it WILL be your fault 🙂

Wow Tristan that is such a big step!  As a kid I dreamed of being a mom and breast feeding my babies.  Raising two children and caring for grandchildren are part of a very full and dynamic life for me.  As you well know, none of us are perfect parents.  At one point my adult son did not speak to me for years.  Our kids seem to feel free to remind us of our failures!  Dear Abby famously did a poll that indicated most parents would reconsider having children at all!  The sense of responsibility can last their entire life!  During a career that included labor and delivery we often joked that people should be required to have a license first;-)  As others have noted there are parenting classes probably offered at your hospital.  Sadly more people attend puppy training classes.
I consider having a personal and ready support network of experienced parents and friends to be essential.  While some babies will sleep 20 hours a day others express themselves through an exhausting colic of crying.  Your personal resolve and strength will be tested. 
And then, there is an incomparable bond and love I share with my children, grandchildren and great grandson.  Love and pain, you know how close they are.

Tessa

Quote from: Tristan on July 20, 2013, 09:43:47 PM
I'm good on the first aide and CPR thing being a nurse and all I'm just worried about the other stuff.
And the thing is a problem with food and earring every week but I'm learning to do alot better with that now

You've mentioned food several times and I'm assuming that you are thinking of possibly breast feeding an infant. It is quite possible to lactate and in many cases even with breast implants as long as the tube/nipple connections haven't been severed. Other than that I would think that bottle feeding with formula would be preferable especially if you are a working mom. When they're six months along you can feed them a tiny amount of baby rice cereal and they'll sleep through the night.

Quote from: Shantel on July 21, 2013, 02:06:37 PM
When they're six months along you can feed them a tiny amount of baby rice cereal and they'll sleep through the night.

Ha! Wanna bet? 😛

Quote from: -Emily- on July 21, 2013, 02:58:42 PM
Ha! Wanna bet?

Mine always did!

My second was a colic baby. I drove around the circle I lived so much I could, (and probably did) drive it in my sleep.


Nothing is certain with babies other than they grow on you, for better or worse.

There really isn't a one-size fits all instruction manual...I'd suggest taking a couple classes, reading a few books, and above all, keep an open mind and a keen eye to see how the baby is doing, to tell whether you're doing it "right" or not.

As long as the baby is generally happy, healthy, and progressing to the best of his/her ability...you're doing fine. But keep trying new things, or old things a second time, in order to get better at it.

Good luck!!

Tristan I hope I/we are not raining too much on your baby parade.  The very idea of having a baby is so positive, optimistic and nurturing that I want to cuddle one right now!  I applaud your thoughtful preparation.  I would note that having lived in large cities and small rural areas that crime and crappy influences are found everywhere in America.  In our big city of Astoria (10,000 people) there is murder, heroin and homeless people along with the quiet, no rush hour, apple pie and baseball stuff.  Love makes a family and builds community too.  You can do it.!

Hugs,
Tessa

For what it is worth, The best  advice I ever received was from my ex mother-in-law. She said to listen politely to all advice, use what you can, simply disregard the rest. When it comes to kids, this was useful advice as everyone tried telling me how to raise my kids.