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one month detranstion down one more to go.

Started by SophiePeters, May 03, 2013, 03:18:56 AM

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SophiePeters

Well I've successfully made it a month without hormones but it hasn't been pretty.  If all goes well in a month I'll be able to cryostore and start again never to look back.   I must say though this expierance definatly put any doubts I've had to rest for good.  Well I hope.   it would seem that my mind no longer functions with testosterone by any means even my friends are like holy hell your all screwed up without your hormones.   I tend to drop stuff and get confused often as to what I was doing
It has definatly been hell headaches body aches wicked insomnia combined with a delirous feeling all the time.  that male urge to punch something seems like its 10 fold but then I winde up just depressed lacking motivation and crying.  Omg and the dysphoria is like a damn atomic bomb I swear my boobs are shrinking and my face is reverting. Does not help that my laser treatments after 6 months haven't done a thing.  Oh and totally crazy first expierance of direct genital dysphoria hit the other day that sucked bad like whatever self image I had built up came crashing back to reality . Guess im looking do encouragement that I can hang in for another month.
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Devlyn

Big hug! You're halfway there, it's the home stretch now. Hugs, Devlyn
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faye

I never thought a year and a half ago that I would make it this far in transition, having a phobia of medications to a degree, a cautious nature i would say. Anyway, taking a break like this is certainly confusing, one month I didn't have one half of my meds and i felt a fraction of what I'm sure you are going through. If this is what you want, makes you happy, smile and laugh, then I'm sure you'll have the strength to persevere. goodluck.
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Tattimatonen

How old are you? What's happened during these months? I'm asking because I'm pretty much in the exact same situation.
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SophiePeters

Tatt sorry for the late reply haven't been on here in awhile,  I am 30 started transition 2 months before my 30th birthday .   i managed so so through the months although there were times i had to take a days worth of estrogen to calm down.   it takes at the minimum 64 days but the place said 90 is more common.   i was completely sterile still when i went in for my appointment at 90 days and she said i should probably give it another 90 days to be sure since i had taken the few days doses inbetween of just my estrogen.   I pretty much said ->-bleeped-<- it ill adopt  i couldn't go another 90 days.  if your going through this i do recommend staying completly off hormones even when times are bad just so you can get a definitive answer granted i would think i would of had at least a small count through that period and they said they couldn't even find 1.  i feel good about my decision both trying and giving up at least i know i tried.
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Joanna Dark

How long had you been on hormones before stopping to cryostore?
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Joanna Dark

Thanks. I guess I'm sterile. But I like men anyway so even if I decided I wanted to children I'm pretty sure my BF would want to father them. I have heard that sterility is sometimes reversible and a trans woman who was on HRT for years detransitioned and two years later fathered a child.
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Chris29

Sophie I m really sorry for you  :(
I was in a similiar situation like you half a year ago: I was a few weeks on hrt and then attempted to sperm bank 2 times but there were no cells in it. After 2.5 months of hrt I stopped for 1 month and there was still no single cell in it, the docs all said that under these circumstances I was probably infertile from the beginning, but I ll never know. Even this "little" time without hrt was like walking through hell.
So yeah, you re not alone with this  ;)
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peky

Quote from: SophiePeters on May 03, 2013, 03:18:56 AM
Well I've successfully made it a month without hormones but it hasn't been pretty.  If all goes well in a month I'll be able to cryostore and start again never to look back.   I must say though this expierance definatly put any doubts I've had to rest for good.  Well I hope.   it would seem that my mind no longer functions with testosterone by any means even my friends are like holy hell your all screwed up without your hormones.   I tend to drop stuff and get confused often as to what I was doing
It has definatly been hell headaches body aches wicked insomnia combined with a delirous feeling all the time.  that male urge to punch something seems like its 10 fold but then I winde up just depressed lacking motivation and crying.  Omg and the dysphoria is like a damn atomic bomb I swear my boobs are shrinking and my face is reverting. Does not help that my laser treatments after 6 months haven't done a thing.  Oh and totally crazy first expierance of direct genital dysphoria hit the other day that sucked bad like whatever self image I had built up came crashing back to reality . Guess im looking do encouragement that I can hang in for another month.

Sounds like absolute Hell to me!!

OOOOO

Peky
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xander

Sorry but I'm a bit confused. Are you stopping hormones to have a baby? Or are you stopping your transition?
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JLT1

Quote from: peky on July 25, 2013, 05:32:26 PM
Sounds like absolute Hell to me!!

OOOOO

Peky

Exactly right.

You can make it.  Focus on the light at the end of the tunnel.  Everything will be safely tucked away for future use and you will resume becoming what you always have been. 

A little caffeine helps, a lot of caffeine or other stimulant makes it worse.  Exercise helps.  Certain beverages are two edged swords, both helping and hurting (I never understood why that was).  Ice in the area you are trying to wake up will stimulate blood flow and might help recovery and possibly shorten the time (I used a can of cold pop stuck between my legs when I was clothed and sitting down as ice was a little cold).  If there is prostate pain, a doctor can do a prostate message (I decided to live with the pain after the first message but it did help).
To move forward is to leave behind that which has become dear. It is a call into the wild, into becoming someone currently unknown to us. For most, it is a call too frightening and too challenging to heed. For some, it is a call to be more than we were capable of being, both now and in the future.
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