I wanted to wait for the right time to tell my father, my aunts, and uncles.  Apparently my family couldn't allow me the time to prepare things in therapy and decided to tell them and out me.  I guess I should have known because my father stopped talking to me 3 weeks ago, and removed me from his insurance.  Serioulsy, that's not cool.  Let me tell my family when I am prepared and have created the letters.  Now, my aunt and uncle are coming over today for what appears to be an intervention.  I'm lucky my dad lives far away from me.  Well, I'm not going to pacify anyone.  I refuse to talk and be belittled.  This is the last straw.  I have a right over my own private personal information.  And I don't need people attacking me at all angles.  I'm a nice person.  I treat others with respect.  I care about their feelings and always have stood by my family.  If they can't do the same, screw them.  I rarely drink, but today is a good day for it. 

P.S. Sorry if this is the wrong category, I am beyond pissed and am not thinking staight.

And apparently, I'm too senstive about this.  I should be grateful that they told everyone and are attacking me.  Seriously, I really give up at this point.  No respect.

Big hug! Coming out events can be bumpy. The good news is, once done it's behind you forever.  Hugs, Devlyn

LtL, you have every right to be angry. What your family is doing is disrespectful and antagonistic.

I don't know what your family members perceive their motives to be, but outing you prematurely strikes me as as politics: a preemptive attack on your ability to shape your messaging.

Maddy shares your frustration

That was an incredibly rude thing to do, LTL...*hugs* and **STRENGTH** to stand your ground and assert yourself and your right to live as YOU see fit.

Anyone who denies this very basic right, does not deserve any respect or courtesy.

Good luck! And like Devlyn said--there's only one "coming out", make it one they'll remember!

I really feel like my family is dead to me.  This was unforgivable.  My dad has been calling 20 times in the span of 10 minutes.  This is after not talking to me for 3 weeks.  And now my mom says he doesn't know "everything" just most of it and she is trying to force me on the phone to make it all clear.  Seriously, she is some evil twisted person to try to force someone in tears into something they can't handle. 

Apparently forcing me to speak to people that I have been outed to when I was prepared is a test of how serious I am about transitioning, which my mother says in a cruel with no compassion.  Seriously, I have never been so pissed, angry, depressed, scared and sad all at one moment.  I wish there was more alcohol in this cheap bottle of wine.

Quote from: learningtolive on August 03, 2013, 04:47:06 PM
Apparently forcing me to speak to people that I have been outed to when I was prepared is a test of how serious I am about transitioning, which my mother says in a cruel with no compassion.  Seriously, I have never been so pissed, angry, depressed, scared and sad all at one moment.  I wish there was more alcohol in this cheap bottle of wine.

On the other hand, there's no going back now, look forward, and be yourself!

They're giving you an intervention? That's crazy. I wish I had some words of encouragement or consolation but it's hard for me to understand this behavior. They are trying to make things so difficult for you that you won't transition. I'm going to go ahead and assume that your mom has never had to deal with any real problems from you or your sisters. By the time I was three, I had incredibly serious medical problems (life and death not chicken pox) so my mom is used to me being a problem. But I'm also pretty sweet and I guess just cute and my BF says it's hard to even get mad at me, so I guess I got that going for me...plus thinking of e as female really isn't a jump for anyone.

I'm assuming that your mom had no clue whatsoever. You should write a book on the perils of coming out. I remember when you were all excited and your sisters were so supportive and now...this. Jeez. Ugh. I think you should consider moving anywhere just to get away. Start putting up ads for roommates. I don't know though maybe it comes across worse then it is over the internet and living there is bearable? Not sure.

Quote from: Joanna Dark on August 03, 2013, 04:51:37 PM
They're giving you an intervention? That's crazy. I wish I had some words of encouragement or consolation but it's hard for me to understand this behavior. They are trying to make things so difficult for you that you won't transition. I'm going to go ahead and assume that your mom has never had to deal with any real problems from you or your sisters. By the time I was three, I had incredibly serious medical problems (life and death not chicken pox) so my mom is used to me being a problem. But I'm also pretty sweet and I guess just cute and my BF says it's hard to even get mad at me, so I guess I got that going for me...plus thinking of e as female really isn't a jump for anyone.

I'm assuming that your mom had no clue whatsoever. You should write a book on the perils of coming out. I remember when you were all excited and your sisters were so supportive and now...this. Jeez. Ugh. I think you should consider moving anywhere just to get away. Start putting up ads for roommates. I don't know though maybe it comes across worse then it is over the internet and living there is bearable? Not sure.

It felt like our relationship was slowly improving, but today it just exploded again.  It's not always so bad as this morning we were talking and watching tv with each other. I love my mom, she means everything to me and shes a good person.  But I am not a gosip article for people to get their kicks off of.  I am a person with feelings.  My mom loves me.  And I understand it is difficult for her to hide it from my father as it isn't easy.  Apparently, my father saw things from insurance statements that made him question and my mom blurted out most of it.  I suppose that's why I'm off the insurance.  And my aunt and uncle know because my mom wanted to see if someone was willing to take me in if she decides to kick me out because she can't handle the transition.  I keep hearing different things and don't kbnow what really happened.  I'm just sitting in my room alone ignoring everybody and hoping it will all go away.

Don't get too drunk, you will need your wits about you, especially if things turn very ugly confrontation-wise.

More *hugs*

My aunt and uncle have been here for about 5 minutes.  No one is trying to get me, so maybe they will leave me alone.  I can't take this.  It's like watching a horror movie and not knowing whats going to happen.  All I wanted to do tonight was relax and study math while listening to classical music.  That was my big plans for the evening.  I didn't want to be going through emotional upheaval I wasn't ready for.  but maybe it will go away.  Let's all hope   Everyone hope really hard for me,lol.  They still haven't knocked on my door and the yelling has stopped 20 minutes or so ago.

Quote from: Beth Andrea on August 03, 2013, 05:02:41 PM
Don't get too drunk, you will need your wits about you, especially if things turn very ugly confrontation-wise.

More *hugs*

It's too late.  But I appreciate the concern.  I never drink, but I need an escape during these situations.  It's just one bottle of wine, though I admit that is a big deal for a huge lightweight like myself,lol.

This is awful. I love my son and I would never do something like that to him.

I really feel for you learningtolive. I do. I wrote off my parents about six months ago before coming out. It sucks but if that's what you have to do to not live in hell then so be it. Otherwise chill on the wine and start thinking. Analyze the problems at hand and find a solution.

Well,one piece of good news throughout this, though unrelated.  I just noticed that I got a job interview offer sent to me today.  I guess it couldn't have come at a better time,lol.  At least that wil cheer me up through all of this.  So yay for that at least

Ltl I'm so sorry to hear about how things went down with your family. Your mom had no right to talk to anyone about your transition. I hope that things with the rest of your family goes better. Maybe they have better heads on their shoulders.

LtL,
I sent you a PM with an offer which I really hope you will act on.
Also, apart from numbing your brain, getting pissed won't really help you very much. That being said, sometimes a bit of numbing maybe the best thing you can do.
Take care.
Donna

If they do come knocking on your door, is it an option to simply refuse to participate in their "intervention"?

You can always call the cops or go over to a friends place.

I hope things are quieting down there.

No one is confronting me.  It's quiet.  I imagine they are gossiping about me in the other room.  Yet, I m okay for now.  I would leave, but I am in no condition to drive at the moment.  And I really have no where to go or anyone that would take me in. 

I know nothing I can say will make you feel better but you have my best wishes getting through this.