So I am waiting to start HRT and to pass the time I am dreaming of life as a girl.

To keep my spirits up I was making a list of the things I am looking forward to... No matter how trivial.  I thought it would be nice to hear from other pre transition girls dreaming of their future.

Here's some of my silly little things...

  That little 'F' on my drivers license.
  Doing comic con in the us in a cool costume.  Spider girl?   Quorra?  Finally proud of how I look.
  Going to a swing dance night and not dancing lead- doing the fun stuff
  Getting a bright color streak in my hair.
  Vintage clothing shops
 

 
 
 

I hear you on the comic-con one.  Several years ago I went to the Penny Arcade Expo with some friends, and I couldn't help but feel it would have been far more fun to go as a woman. 

Walking through a market in France in a light summer dress, feeling the skirt swish against my legs, stopping to look at the beautiful fruits and vegetables on the stalls. Picking them up and savouring their smell, all the while talking and laughing with a girlfriend, both of us knowing our men are waiting for us when we get home.

Looking in the mirror and finally seeing a woman staring back at me!

Walking around a packed shopping mall and not being clocked once!!

The moment that my name legally changes to Zoe Louise Taylor

Being called "Miss Taylor" for the first time!!

Zoe
x

My fav dream, I am dancing (ok just being able to dance and not wreck myself will require some dreaming hehe), and I am wearing a great looking outfit which means a dress of some sort. And the music is great (likely quite the dream there as I doubt they play the music I want anywhere nearby), but any way I am dancing and it is a great evening and the song ends, and I wander off the dance floor to get a drink (likely gin and tonic with a lot of lime, hey it's a dream so I can afford it hehe). So I am at the bar enjoying my drink and I get a man groping my ass.

Excuse me buddy that isn't on the market eh. And I flash my wedding ring at him.

Well ideally I want to be able to look good enough that a guy would actually think of doing something like that I suppose.

Going to comic con (I've never been) in a cool costume like Seras Victoria from Hellsing.
Actually feeling good about myself when I look in the mirror.
Boobies!
Legally changing my name to Roxanne Mallorie Burste.
Meeting a nice girl and having a lesbian relationship(:
Going to nightclubs and raves.

-Hopefully one day getting to be the hot female college professor.   Though we will have to see whether that one ever happens for two different reasons.
-Publishing boring academic books with the proper name on the cover.
-Being respected for the person I actually am. 
-Meeting the guy of my dreams and getting to be his awesome wife.
-Being able to adopt and one day get to be a mommy!
-Getting to look cute and dress pretty.
-Feel comfortable socializing in a more feminine manner without fear.
-The ability to go out for and take part of girls night out.
-Living the life of my dreams.

I just want to look cute and female. And be female. Or as close as is possible. Everything else will come with that.

Having someone close, who I can share and do anything with. Mostly I think about a lover, but almost everything you do with a lover, you can do it with a close friend too. Having someone who genuinely loves and understands me, and who can be there for me. And who regards me enough to allow me to be there for them too.

Basically, someone to go through life with, to stop feeling like I've been made too weak for the world, and to stop feeling alone and desperate. Nothing of that is specifically female, but uncomfortably living as a guy, I couldn't find anyone. The least I can do is hope that being more comfortable with who I am will increase my chances.

Also, especially when I have someone in particular in mind like I do and have for quite a while now, I admit I have those stereotypical dreams of a wedding and other cute, romantic things.

All sweet dreams so far!

Mmmm...
Okay...  Getting a cute tattoo- I hated my body before so a tattoo made no difference.  Feeling my body is really mine and I can decorate it if I wish!

More on the fantasy side:  going to a lesbian night at a club and getting hit on.  I am taken, but still would be confirmation of the woman I will have become.  What a smile that brings.  (I used to go to mardi gras and it hurt when I got scowled at by girls who thought I was at straight guy tourist.   It would be a nice bandaid over that little ouchie.)

Oh.. speaking of which finally going to Sydney mardi gras and wearing my colors proudly.  L and T and proud of it.  Hell... even take part.

Going out part time for the first time with my cis sisters.  Nervous but unleashed!

Twirling in a twirly dress.

It is funny... Practically all of mine have been listed, so I can't think of any to contribute. Actually... No, I can. There are five dreams, really, all of which explain my personality I guess. Except the thing is, they are very likely to happen.

The first is of me being the founder of several companies. Me, standing before a meeting room full of men, dressed in a power suit, and having them kowtowing to appease me, respecting me. It would be proof to men and women alike that women CAN accomplish great things. Seriously... It frustrates me how many women I've heard saying that I'd be giving up so much and how hard it would be to achieve the dreams I have now as a woman. So yeah, I know I don't have to prove them wrong, rather I owe myself to make my dreams a reality, no matter what I am.

Two... I wish to stand before crowds and be an advocate for not just LGBTQIA rights, but rather for human rights. This is going to happen. I just can't stand by and just watch all of the bad things happen anymore. I'm tired of being on the sidelines. So yeah, I wish to speak out against the abuse people receive, just for being themselves. People like that should be commended, not abused. So I wish to make that happen.

Three... I wish to one day start my own college and a school of philosophy. One thing that I've noticed about humanity is that they tend to persecute those that they do not understand. Because of that, I wish to elevate the level of understanding of the "average" human being. If they can understand us, they will be more apt to accept is. Only then will we be able to lie without fear.

Four... I wish to start a few nonprofit organizations that will provide aid to the LGBTQIA community and will also research the cause behind our state of being. It hurts me to see people in the community not getting the proper health care that they need in order to be healthy. I'm also tired of the suicides, of the murders, of people like us ending up homeless, just because they are "different." I'm also tired of the ones who lack understanding labeling us as perverts and condemning us. If they have scientific proof that it isn't a perversion, then they have no grounds for their abuse. I wish to also research gene splicing, organ printing and stem cell research. Not just for trans, really. Rather, I wish to cure Cerebral Palsy and other conditions. We are at the stage where we CAN achieve this, we just have to want to. I also wish to work at restoring our home planet to its former glory. Part of this would be to develop new forms of green tech.

Five... I wish to perform in front of an audience one day. I wish to sing about the state of the world. About how things will get brighter. How there is hope. I also wish to be in plays. Do voice acting. Do dramatic readings. Be in movies and make movies. Learn dancing and do a performance. And I wish to write many books.

All of these dreams may seem unrealistic, but they are things that I wish to achieve one day, and I will. Being how I am has been a gift, really... It allows me to see things from both sides, in a way. While sometimes I may dislike it, most of the time I love it, because as I've started my journey, I've begun to see that it is indeed going to be a beautiful life. So now I am just to get going and live my new life. And I'll make ALL of my dreams a reality. Haven't even listed all of them.

Sure, I may sound unrealistic and a bit like an airhead. But hey, you DID say dreams. Oh wait... You said little dreams. I never seem to have those. Lol. Well, my little dream is already becoming a reality. I'm becoming myself, no matter what. So yeah... One down, many to go. Hehe.

Had always dreamed about getting rid of my facial hair.
All but gone now and makes a big difference.

Seeing my male features disappear is a dream slowly coming true.
Looking forward to starting hormones and growing breasts like us all.

I have always avoided the mardi gras as never knew how to get involved.

Wearing a dress for the first time.

Shopping with a GF.

I long the day it is finally gone for good.

I just want to wake up one day, and 'transgender' is just an topic for discussion, and not need to spend all my time focused on it.

I want to wake up as a woman, and the idea I am not a woman would be like saying I was a martian.

I want to be past the whole process of spending all the time on an effort to be not a man.

I'd like to be able to look in the mirror in the morning, and look like a woman that just crawled out of bed.

This is a little one... But getting a straw automatically put in my drink.   

Drinking in a pub with friends years from now and a mate saying. .. Oh god... I forgot you used to be a boy... That was ages ago!

Putting together a photo album with me in it and not hating it.

Sun bathing with my wife on a tropical holiday.

Dress making.

Quote from: Lesley_Roberta on August 15, 2013, 06:57:35 AM
I just want to wake up one day, and 'transgender' is just an topic for discussion, and not need to spend all my time focused on it.

^^ This, so much.

Quote from: Carlita on August 14, 2013, 08:31:07 AM
Walking through a market in France in a light summer dress, feeling the skirt swish against my legs, stopping to look at the beautiful fruits and vegetables on the stalls. Picking them up and savouring their smell, all the while talking and laughing with a girlfriend, both of us knowing our men are waiting for us when we get home.

Today is a public holiday in France and almost no one is working today or tomorrow, including me. The weather is absolutely perfect, around 26°C (79°F), with a light breeze and not a cloud in the sky.

I am just back from a little shopping as it happens and was wearing a light summer dress similar to what I am wearing in my avatar photo. Referring to Carlita's post above, I can only confirm just how absolutely delightful it is to feel the gentle heat on my shoulders and the air circulating between the dress and my body.For that sensation alone, it is almost worth making this journey...

To continue with a perfect day, this evening I will be having dinner with my three kids, my eldest daughters compagnon and my 2 month old grand-daughter. We are going to  a restaurant situated  on the bank of a good sized river with a table reserved on a plane tree covered terrace just overlooking the water. The sun goes down on the opposite side of the river and typically there are swans and other water birds going about their business in the vicinity.

The menu is based very much on products from the river, frogs legs, fried sprat and a most delicious fresh water fish stew called a "pochouse", all served with a nice Burgandy white wine.

I will be going in my summer dress and it will be the first time my kids see me in quite such feminine attire. We have been there lots of times before but as I no longer live in the same region as my kids, it has been two or three years since the last time.

It really is a whole new life and instead of playing the role of "pater familias"as in the past, I will find my self in the role of the doting Granny.

Now all of you fellow travellers, isn't that also something to dream of and aspire to ! 
Donna
 

Quote from: Emmaline on August 14, 2013, 07:06:10 AM
  That little 'F' on my drivers license.
  Doing comic con in the us in a cool costume.  Spider girl?   Quorra?  Finally proud of how I look.
  Going to a swing dance night and not dancing lead- doing the fun stuff
  Getting a bright color streak in my hair.
  Vintage clothing shops

Haha, we share a lot of the same 'silly little things'.  I didn't wait on the costume side, though.  I started with something I could explain away (Mana from Malice Mizer(He's still a guy under that!)) and gave up moving on to be part of a Jem and the Holograms group, and Twilight Sparkle for a MLP group.

It feels safer to me to be out in costume so I'm looking more forward to replacing my old Man Mask wardrobe with more girly clothing that fits my every day idiom.  So let's see here....

- Never having to examine my face in close detail for any hair I missed with the razor
- Getting my legal name change
- Flipping a giant mental middle finger to my ultra-conservative family at the next reunion
- Getting to flirt with my wife(or someone else should the worst happen with that) as a woman
- Fighting the social stimgas around a woman in the tech industry(Why am I looking FORWARD to this?!!)
- Finally feeling like my body has all the parts it is meant to!

Quote from: Emmaline on August 15, 2013, 04:09:48 AM
All sweet dreams so far!

Mmmm...
Okay...  Getting a cute tattoo- I hated my body before so a tattoo made no difference.  Feeling my body is really mine and I can decorate it if I wish!

More on the fantasy side:  going to a lesbian night at a club and getting hit on.  I am taken, but still would be confirmation of the woman I will have become.  What a smile that brings.  (I used to go to mardi gras and it hurt when I got scowled at by girls who thought I was at straight guy tourist.   It would be a nice bandaid over that little ouchie.)

Oh.. speaking of which finally going to Sydney mardi gras and wearing my colors proudly.  L and T and proud of it.  Hell... even take part.

Going out part time for the first time with my cis sisters.  Nervous but unleashed!

Twirling in a twirly dress.

I also would love to sport a sexy dorky tattoo.  Currently I'm thinking of a stocking line down the back of my legs such as the image below... but with the dorky twist of it being made up of small font GCTA letters that when interpreted as DNA, transcribed to RNA and translated to amino acid single letter abbreviations it spells out something important, or perhaps even just the coding region for a given protein... Hehe, chemical engineer with a minor in biochemistry.


Lesbian club with the wife would be wonderful as well

Quote from: Donna Elvira on August 15, 2013, 08:12:32 AM
Today is a public holiday in France and almost no one is working today or tomorrow, including me. The weather is absolutely perfect, around 26°C (79°F), with a light breeze and not a cloud in the sky.

I am just back from a little shopping as it happens and was wearing a light summer dress similar to what I am wearing in my avatar photo. Referring to Carlita's post above, I can only confirm just how absolutely delightful it is to feel the gentle heat on my shoulders and the air circulating between the dress and my body.For that sensation alone, it is almost worth making this journey...

To continue with a perfect day, this evening I will be having dinner with my three kids, my eldest daughters compagnon and my 2 month old grand-daughter. We are going to  a restaurant situated  on the bank of a good sized river with a table reserved on a plane tree covered terrace just overlooking the water. The sun goes down on the opposite side of the river and typically there are swans and other water birds going about their business in the vicinity.

The menu is based very much on products from the river, frogs legs, fried sprat and a most delicious fresh water fish stew called a "pochouse", all served with a nice Burgandy white wine.

I will be going in my summer dress and it will be the first time my kids see me in quite such feminine attire. We have been there lots of times before but as I no longer live in the same region as my kids, it has been two or three years since the last time.

It really is a whole new life and instead of playing the role of "pater familias"as in the past, I will find my self in the role of the doting Granny.

Now all of you fellow travellers, isn't that also something to dream of and aspire to ! 
Donna

How wonderful to think that dreams CAN come true! I hope you had a lovely dinner with your family and that you looked and felt wonderful in your summer dress!

I feel right with myself, congruent and gender dysphoria is but a memory. Also I'm financially stable enough to enjoy life without having to worry about my next paycheck.. Another thing would be to get whistled at and me and my wife giggle