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making that first step...

Started by Kei22, August 21, 2013, 05:11:13 PM

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Kei22

This may sound strange but  I need some confidense. Being all this time buying from the girl's section and not actually "looking" at boy's clothes i feel a little apprehensive pf going in and looking because i get all nervious and embarrased...

What if someone ask me for what i want this or that,or what size or they tell me that the clothes i want to try on are for boys..just lots of stuff that make no sense but still make me nervious...

Just. Making that step its sort of hard. Even harder if i am with my mom shopping.

With a friend it won't happen,i woukd be kind of embarrased but a little more secure...


What do you guys think? 

I was thinking on getting some stuff by internet first since i know the sizes that fit me on some things...

PD: Sorry for typos,my phone has a touch keypad and sometimes my finger slips
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kenton_07

Yeah you just need more confidence. You can ease yourself into this, you don't have to jump right in. Go into random stores even if you don't like their clothes and look through the boys/mens section just to get a feel. If you are in a store with decent customer service, someone will ask you if you need help with anything and you can just say no thanks I'm just browsing. I've never had someone tell me that I was in the wrong section and that womens is somewhere else. That may be because I never really dressed like a girl..ever.. and I would literally wear sweatpants and a tshirt or just athletic clothes everywhere I went. You can try something like that, just start out small. Go buy or order some guys clothes online if you don't feel comfortable starting in the store. The only thing I would recommend with this is that you order from somewhere with free shipping and free returns because each piece of clothing differs in size.

So many girls shop in the boys or mens department these days I don't think anyone would question it. A lot of the bigger stores in shopping malls don't question what people buy or look at you funny because they aren't really supposed to criticize the customers that shop there. They get paid to give good customer service and treat customers nicely/respectfully. Use that to your advantage!
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Adam (birkin)

I remember the first time I bought men's clothes. Actually, I started out with men's underwear lol. I was with my brother in Sears, and I saw these Joe Boxers and really wanted them. I asked him if he'd buy them and he said "No way! If you want to wear them you buy them. You can't live your life in fear." I was actually worried that they would think I was a pervert and call security (I'm not joking - I grew up very sheltered). So I said "fine, I don't want them that badly." We walked around doing more Christmas shopping, and then I said to him "you know what? let's go back." I was nervous at the counter, but it was no big deal at all. And when I got home...I was so happy. For me, that was a huge accomplishment, I did something for myself even though I was scared of backlash.

Since then, I have shopped exclusively in the men's section for the past 6 years. Honestly, most people don't notice - women shop for their husbands and boyfriends all the time. I often see more women in the men's section than men. And men's clothes are more comfortable.

Sometimes I would ask where the pants were and they'd take me to women's pants. I would just say "I'd like to see the men's section please."

One time I did get the "those clothes are for boys." I simply said "perhaps, but that's what I would like to wear." That was one time in 6 years. And those comments are really rude. You don't owe anyone an explanation as to why you wish to wear a certain type of clothes.

You'll get more comfortable with time. :) If you are scared, take it slow and just think about how good it's going to feel afterwards. How much better you'll feel wearing what you want to instead of what you are told to wear.
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CursedFireDean

As caleb said, it'll take confidence, but there will be so few people who even notice/comment.
When I first bought myself men's underwear, I was not ever passing (hadn't cut my hair yet) and I just grabbed them and walked shyly up to the check out lane. The cashier didn't look twice, it's not his job to wonder why people are buying things. Besides they could always be for a husband/brother/son/father.





Check me out on instagram @flammamajor
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Mattfromengland

I was just recently in some shops and kind of wanted to look at the mens underwear. I was a little too embarrassed and was hoping my BF would look so I could just browse with him and if I saw something that looked like it would fit then I'd consider buying it. I was way too embarrassed to go look on my own or to even mention to him that I wanted to. So far although I usually pass as long as I don't speak to anyone as I wear gender neutral clothing such as jeans (always been mens of course), I've always worn women's underwear. So it just felt like an embarrassing step to say to my BF, despite that he knows I'm trans and is fully supportive.

Anyway, my point is I know where you're coming from, and I have to admit that the advice I'm about to give is something I myself need to heed!!!! :D

Last Christmas I bought my nephew some Superdry boxers. I didn't think anything of it. Women do buy mens clothes for other men. As presents, as partners etc, etc. So no one will bat an eyelid. (Need to keep telling myself this). Men also my women's clothes for their partners. Especially underwear, it's pretty common.

If you need help from the store assistant and you don't feel confident you could always say it's a present. Take your measurements in tell them your BF is this size and ask what should you get?

I think the problem arrises because YOU know it's for you. They don't.

Not sure any of that will help, but maybe it might a little.

Either way good luck (hopefully I might get some myself soon).

Oh and yes, online is always good and you can return if it doesn't fit. It might just cost you postage but that's worth it I think.


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BrotherBen

I think if someone told me "Those clothes are for boys" my response would just be "Uh-huh..." *keeps shopping* or if I were feeling particularly verbose, maybe "Yeah, and your point is...?"

At one point or another in this process, we are all going to get judged. Haters gonna hate. That is their problem, not yours, and we will grow out of our awkward phases, while they will probably be stuck with that closed mind for the rest of their lives.


Be weird. Be random. Be who you are. Because you never know who would love the person you hide.
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Mattfromengland

Quote from: MaybeBen on August 21, 2013, 07:19:27 PM
we will grow out of our awkward phases, while they will probably be stuck with that closed mind for the rest of their lives.

Hear, hear!!!!!!  ;D


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