I met with a gender therapist the first time today. I was a nervous because honestly I didn't know how much he would want to actually counsel me or how long it should take. I admit that my primary goal is to eventually acquire a recommendation for surgery, but it's not my first time receiving therapy so I'm used to opening up at these meetings.
He asked me basically why I was there and I mentioned my situation and that I have been living as Vincent for 3 years now and I have been on T for approximately 6 months now. I also divulged some of my anxiety issues (I have anxiety disorder) and a few awful habits I have about obsessing over my academics. I was completely honest about all of the ->-bleeped-<- I've been through and some of the other, non-related, mental issues I struggle with. I kind of regret it.
He said that honestly at this point he would not recommend me for surgery because of my anxiety issues. I told him I do want to work to overcome my anxiety and I understand the risks of having anxiety issues and having a major surgery. I tried to assure him that even though I have some other mental diseases that I am very certain of my identity and have been for a long time. I have thought about it rationally and extensively.
He sent me off in kind of a concerning tone to make another appointment in a few weeks time. I'm worried that I made the wrong impression and that it's irreversible. I don't want to waste my time with him if he will never approve me. I feel like an idiot opening up about something that I can handle. I feel like it's going to set me back.
I am more than willing to work on my issues by doing therapy with him but I don't want him to view me as a lost cause because of it.
Has anyone dealt with anything similar...?
