First of all, Serena Lynn and Jenny Girl, I saw both of your videos a few days ago and they were both really wonderful and touching. Serena, I can only imagine what you've gone through with your child, but the difference between the way you look now and when you were still trying to be male are incredible. Jenny, you've really amazed me saying you were happy as a male but felt something nagging. I hated being a male impersonator so much that even at 12 I told my mom that if I had to live as a boy I didn't want to live at all. I wish things would have been different, but they weren't. Now they are.
I had a very important anniversary today, two years living as the only me I've ever really been. To look in the mirror and see a woman even without makeup is simply amazing and in two years I not only haven't gotten tired of finally being me, it gets better daily as I grow constantly. I'm simply flicking away the last vestiges of the pain of 57 years of depression, pain and sadness of living a constant and grotesque lie, and there's a happy woman who's emerged. I never thought that being a DES child was a good thing till transition. I still have specks I have to watch out for, but I was being crushed by a mountain of granite pain so heavy I tried to end feeling anything at all three times, because of my hopelessness of ever being happy. If I knew in 1977 what I know now, I would have gone through with my first half attempt at transition at 23, not my one and only real attempt at success beginning two years ago today. I'm finally really happy and at peace. Two years!?!? Hugs, Mira
