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Going to general therapist, not gender therapist?

Started by E-Brennan, October 17, 2013, 05:17:59 PM

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E-Brennan

Here's my dilemma.  I recently finally got the courage to call a local therapy practice that has a therapist who is experienced with gender issues, but he was not taking new patients.  Instead, I was offered another therapist - who seems acceptable to me - but who has no expertise dealing with gender issues.

Now I've got a pile of issues to deal with, gender being just one.  What would your thoughts be on going to see this non-expert therapist and working through some of those issues (including mentioning gender issues and seeing where we get to), instead of avoiding therapy altogether?

I'm not looking (at this point at least) for any kind of letter or approval, and I have no plans to go on HRT or seek SRS (again, at this point at least).  It's more just someone confidential to talk to who may at least be able to offer a starting point to better mental health overall.
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Jerri

I started with a behavioral therapist, who has been great to work with we really connected and she was very helpful with many issues, she works with a another who has a back ground in dealing with gender issues so after I came out to me and her we agreed to learn together and use her partner if it got to much, for my letter I did have to go to a gender specialist to get my insurance coverage for the process. just my two cents, it was a place to start for me, but if you are paying out of pocket might want to be sure they can help with the documentation.

wishing you you the best Jerri
one day, one step, with grace it will be forward today
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E-Brennan

Thanks Jerri.  That really helps.   :)

I'm all over the place as to how I think about this step.  Maybe I called too soon.  Maybe way too late.  Maybe he'll be the wrong therapist.  Maybe I'll take one look and think "this is dumb".  Maybe I'll shut the doors and not let anyone into my head and it'll be like there's nothing that needs discussing.  Maybe I'll say way too much about myself and cross a line I don't intend to right now.

Very nervous...hard to trust anyone with this information in real life. :(
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Jerri

for me just being open and honest with my therapist has proven to work best for getting things going the right direction, I am expressing my self more than I could have ever imagined. I am out and still living with my wife, my work turned to be super supportive much to m surprise, and most of our friends have been accepting and supportive for us both. I hope you are able to find someone that will work with you, I was lucky and found a person with some native religious back ground so she could understand my back ground quicker. there is a fit for each of us, some just a bit harder to find I suppose.
Jerri
one day, one step, with grace it will be forward today
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E-Brennan

I decided to cancel the appointment.  I just got a weird feeling from the office and the staff, almost like I was an inconvenience rather than a person needing help.

Good news, I did find a broad-based psychological practice with MDs, PhDs, Psy.Ds, LCSW, and great support staff, and a number of people who are aware of gender issues.  That sounds like a far better place for me to start.  I'm not looking for a letter or prescription or anything.  I just want to talk to someone about this.
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Jerri

sounds like a better choice of facilities, it takes a bit of time and effort to find the right place/people. i feel it is worth the effort so i am comfortable with whom i am counting on for the right support. I hope you will have good luck with the staff there.
xo Jerri
one day, one step, with grace it will be forward today
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JoanneB

When it became very evident to me that I needed to take on the trans beast a few years ago, after finding a local TG support group I also sought out a therapist. Being out in the boonies, all that was available in under a 3 hour drive was a generalist that others in my group went to, so certainly TG friendly. Which was exactly what I was looking for since transition was the last thing on my To-Do list. Been there, tried that twice.

I knew, after a lot of life review, that many to perhaps all of my big life disasters had a root cause of me being TG. I had developed a lot of not so good ways of handling it. Plus throw in a few tons of low self esteem and self worth. It was the desire to get a handle on my many other life issues and perhaps learn a few better ways to get by as a guy. Talking to someone who is at least familiar with the crap stuck in a TG's head was usefull. He was more of, what I call, a rubber stamper, and not the person offering the hoped for great insights I hoped for.

Things have changed a lot for the better in my life, as well as a lot more complicated. The last thing on my To-Do list certainly moved up to close to first place. The best therapy I got so far is from the fantastic TG support group I found, followed by the therapist. With self acceptance came many other positive things in my life.

I now am able to see a gender therapist and have been for about 6 months. I still have no immediate plans for transitioning to full-time. That if/when it happens is at least 2-3 years away, due to circumstances. If I was on the immediate path to go full time I would say she is a great help. Since I am in this limbo land, I doubt there can be any support to help me muddle through while I constantly debate which fork in the road ahead to take.
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E-Brennan

Thanks for the insight, Jerri and Joanne.  I don't want the difficulty of finding a suitable therapist to make me give up on it, because I think therapy is the one thing I do need right now.
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