Quote from: morticia on July 19, 2007, 08:12:33 PM
You mean the avatar?  Oh dear god, I WISH I looked half that good.
That's just a stock avatar the system has here.
I'm so ashamed of my ugly mug that I hide indoors all the time with the curtains drawn.
I'm embarrassed to even go to the grocery store.  Looking in the mirror makes me cry because there's someone there that's NOT me, but some horrid, ugly male.  For me, I put FFS as the ultimate priority.  SRS will naturally follow.
I'm on the path again.  This time it's do or die.

It's very misleading and I am in constant thought that most people in here look really fantastic and genetic and it makes me feel insecure about my own looks. It's very confusing and I don't know who is real and who is presenting a false image of themselves. I thought you were gorgeous until this confession. I know Rachael and Melissa are real and a lot of others are too........can people on the forum please be honest with their photographs or just post a pic of their pet like a dog or cat in their aviator so we have a better idea what people are posting their real picture's and the one's who prefer to be anonymous..

Quote from: Berliegh on July 20, 2007, 09:11:13 AM
It's very misleading and I am in constant thought that most people in here look really fantastic and genetic and it makes me feel insecure about my own looks.

Are you kidding?  I thought you were one of the fantastic looking ones.   I feel insecure about my own looks at times, but that's usually due to comparing myself with GGs.  I'm just happy that I pass well without having undergone any surgeries.

Quote from: Berliegh on July 20, 2007, 09:11:13 AMI know Rachael and Melissa are real and a lot of others are too........

Yep, I'm real.  I've been on susans since I began my transition a year and three quarters ago.  Eventually you get to know which people have real avatars and which do not.  If it helps, you can browse through the stock avatars to give you an idea of which ones are not real.

Quote from: Melissa on July 20, 2007, 09:30:22 AM
Are you kidding?  I thought you were one of the fantastic looking ones.   I feel insecure about my own looks at times, but that's usually due to comparing myself with GGs.  I'm just happy that I pass well without having undergone any surgeries.

Me? look fantastic? no way, I don't think so......but I do try to look natural and an everyday kind of person (hopefully)..

Quote from: Melissa on July 20, 2007, 09:30:22 AM

Yep, I'm real.  I've been on susans since I began my transition a year and three quarters ago.  Eventually you get to know which people have real avatars and which do not.  If it helps, you can browse through the stock avatars to give you an idea of which ones are not real.

Why is there a selection of beautiful ladies pictures as stock aviators? is it so people can lie and pretend they are someone else. I don't like it and it makes us genuine folk feel insecure about how we look.

Photos like u discribe, peoples real photos can b very incouraging that peole like u and i stand a chance of passing, that mascalin features can feminised. As u say thats y ffs is so important but we must not for get people buy the package and not just your features n looks.

yes, I am really a unicorn. 

Just thought I would clear the air.

Jessica

Quote from: Berliegh on July 20, 2007, 09:40:06 AM

Quote from: Melissa on July 20, 2007, 09:30:22 AM
Are you kidding?  I thought you were one of the fantastic looking ones.   I feel insecure about my own looks at times, but that's usually due to comparing myself with GGs.  I'm just happy that I pass well without having undergone any surgeries.

Me? look fantastic? no way, I don't think so......but I do try to look natural and an everyday kind of person (hopefully)..

Quote from: Melissa on July 20, 2007, 09:30:22 AM

Yep, I'm real.  I've been on susans since I began my transition a year and three quarters ago.  Eventually you get to know which people have real avatars and which do not.  If it helps, you can browse through the stock avatars to give you an idea of which ones are not real.

Why is there a selection of beautiful ladies pictures as stock aviators? is it so people can lie and pretend they are someone else. I don't like it and it makes us genuine folk feel insecure about how we look.

I really don't see why you should feel insecure, Berliegh. As Melissa said, you do look fantastic. You just look like an everyday genetic woman I'd see walking her dog in my neighborhood. And I know it ain't the camera angle or the lighting, because you've used other avatars of you.
But that's women for you.

Quote from: Berliegh on July 20, 2007, 09:40:06 AM
Me? look fantastic? no way, I don't think so......but I do try to look natural and an everyday kind of person (hopefully)..

Yep, you do look very natural.  That's one reasons you look fantastic.

Quote from: Berliegh on July 20, 2007, 09:40:06 AMWhy is there a selection of beautiful ladies pictures as stock aviators? is it so people can lie and pretend they are someone else. I don't like it and it makes us genuine folk feel insecure about how we look.

The photos have been here since before I joined.  I think it's helps people who have not even begun to transition at least get a bit of relief by being seen as a beautiful woman online.  When I first joined, I used some stock photo for a bit and then eventually took one of myself wearing a wig and makeup.  I left that up for quite a while and then after I had been on hormones for a bit and my hair had grown some, I took the plunge and took a natural photo of myself without a wig or breast forms.  As I continued improving, I just kept updating my photo.  I did use my fairy avatar for a while as my avatar, but I eventually changed it back.

My point is that for some people who really aren't passable, it provides a sense of security.  Unfortunately, many of those individuals suffer dysphoria in everyday life because they don't look like those photos.  I'm now proud of what I look like, so I like using my real photo.

Trust me Gina havin my photo as my avatar would not b pritty. Talkin to Lucy and a photo of a 30 year old man. (I DONT THINK SO)

Quote from: regina on July 20, 2007, 11:54:46 AMI know this isn't a discussion about avatars, but it does have to do with self-image. Just my opinion—I don't think using someone else's pic as your avatar is a good for your image of yourself. To me, transitioning is all about finally dealing with realities. The reality of what kind of woman you are and will be. Presenting oneself as something other than who you are doesn't really help that process and will only make it harder when it does come time to show the world what you look like. Especially when people use avatars that are yonger, more femmy looking and prettier than they are, it's very hard to develop a sense of self-acceptance that's key to transitioning. Again, just speaking for myself, I would rather not see an avatar than see one that doesn't match the current reality of that person.

While I agree with your overall message, for many people, just joining susan's and posting is a step towards self acceptance.  Self acceptance does not happen overnight, it must be done in smaller steps.  For some people, it can take years.  Using a picture of themselves is a huge step towards self acceptance, but not all are ready to do that yet.  I personally like seeing some photo rather than none because it makes threads much easier to scan if you are looking for a particular person's post.

I really am elvin 

I used real photos for my avatars for a while, then stopped because of potential privacy issues. I'm sure I'll use another real photo again. Sure wouldn't mind a little photoshop on the bald spot though 

zythyra

QuoteMe? look fantastic? no way, I don't think so......but I do try to look natural and an everyday kind of person (hopefully)..

Well, on my scale (if I met you in a bar, would I want to take you home?) I think you look great.   

But a lot of people not only are not comfortable about their looks, some of us worry about our pics getting stolen, which is why I never post pics on line. I've traded pics with people that I know and trust, but putting it out there where anyone can 'hack' it does not work for me.

I've seen what happens to photo's that get doctored by trolls, and it is not pretty. My photo would be a coup for some of trolls where I normally post, because I troll the trolls. They would sacrifice their first born to get my pic.

omg, my face might be stolen? crap, im starting to like it...

yes, i use my face as my avitar because i want to get attention and show everyone how god damn amazing i am... OBVIOUSLY...

I don't want to show my face because I don't want people to yell at me in public and say I am not a real transsexual.






The real reason is, I don't really want to be identified as a transsexual just for everyone to see (esp the non trans lurkers)  so i am not going to post how i look like, but you can see half of my face, your job is to guess what the other half looks like. =p

That's not to say I don't have my pics posted on the internet, I just don't want to post it all over the web.

oh oh oh, like a mouth and chin? do i get a prize? 

Quote from: Rachael on July 20, 2007, 03:16:51 PM
oh oh oh, like a mouth and chin? do i get a prize? 

My chin is VERY female, of course. Leave me alone!  lol.

did i say it wasnt?  paranoia luv...

Quote from: regina on July 20, 2007, 03:09:25 PM
Look, it ain't on the same level of importance as 50 million other issues, but... I've seen people on forums who used certain photos for years and were then paranoid about what the reaction would be when they showed their real face. I don't believe it helps people come to terms with the reality of transition if not the opposite. If someone needs an image, use a unicorn or Hello Kitty or whatever, but putting a face (especially a way prettier/younger one) that isn't your own is kind of misrepresentation. As someone else said, it also makes other people who are starting out overwhelmed at how 'gorgeous' so many transitioners are and even more despairing about ever reaching that level. I also believe that some people knowingly do it to get status and attention from other forum participants or to come off as something they're not (eg younger).

Again, I am not disagreeing with you, I was merely explaining (as a devil's advocate) how they *might* provide some benefit to people (say a pretransitional trans-woman who looks completely male) with a means of "instantly" changing their look.  However, I do agree that some kind of cartoon or non-photographic representation might be more beneficial to a would-be transitioner.

On a different forum that I joined, I found a photo of another woman that I liked and used that.  Soon I began receiving compliments about how good I looked.  I told them that picture wasn't really of me and quickly changed it to my real one.  Thereafter, whenever I received compliments about how good I looked, it really boosted my self esteem.  So, from personal experience, you are correct.

We don't have to always disagree on stuff, you know.

Posted on: July 20, 2007, 02:24:41 PM

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Quote from: Rachael on July 20, 2007, 02:11:28 PM
omg, my face might be stolen? crap, im starting to like it...

Yep, you better be careful.   http://science.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=05/09/19/175236&from=rss

Quote from: Rachael on July 20, 2007, 03:16:51 PM
oh oh oh, like a mouth and chin? do i get a prize? 

LOL

Quote from: asiangurliee on July 20, 2007, 03:18:28 PMMy chin is VERY female, of course. Leave me alone!  lol.

You *did* tell her it was her job to guess what the other half of the picture under your arm looks like.  She was just guessing you had a mouth and chin under that arm.   I'm not sure how you read that as her implying it may not be female.   Or maybe you did get it, made another joke, and neither of us got it.

the little photos are stock avitars from the forums (generally)

Quote from: Berliegh on July 20, 2007, 09:11:13 AM
It's very misleading and I am in constant thought that most people in here look really fantastic and genetic and it makes me feel insecure about my own looks.  I know Rachael and Melissa are real and a lot of others are too........can people on the forum please be honest with their photographs or just post a pic of their pet like a dog or cat in their aviator so we have a better idea what people are posting their real picture's and the one's who prefer to be anonymous..

There was a topic about this subject not long ago.  If you do a search it will explain it in a hepful way.

That being said, Berliegh, you are gorgeous!  Truly!  Why in the world world would you feel insecure?  I was totally scared to post my first pic, but I got over it.  Andt those here have seen my pic morph into what it looks like now, and have been helpful in my doing so.  I'd like to see some more of your pics, and I think you are one incredibly gorgeous woman.

Kristi