I asked myself these questions.

Do girls or guys annoy you more? Guys
Me Kissing boys - gross to me
Give up my girl stuff? - I can't give it up
Wearing girls clothes - feels normal like myself
Becoming full girl - not easy. Leaving behind my girl side would be hard.
Again becoming full girl -  at times yes forever but other times no
Going blonde - yes want to!
Jaw adjustment -  yes want now
No facial hair or chest hair forever - yes
Want long hair like girls - YES!!!
Comfortable with my girl side - def yes!
Mom dressing me as a girl at 5 for Halloween -not weird
Dress up? - fun!!
Wanted breasts before? - ya but forever not sure
Ever been depressed by not having breasts - yes at times before
Never having guy parts? - girls pee to
Did you love playing with barbies at 5  - yes!!
Wearing dresses - I'd do miniskirts
Pink or blue? I like both
Jewelry?  - fun!
Have I shaved my legs and arms before? Yes but more often my arms!
Shave my armpits? Yes in winter spring fall often but summer no
Call myself a girl? Yes have before
Get called a man men or sir - makes me annoyed
Call myself a woman? Never but I've been called it before and not offended
Sad I can't go out as a girl? Ya I am
Sad I wasn't born a girl? At times yes
Easy to dress as a girl? Yes
Easy to undress back to guy? No
Do I compare myself to girls often? Yes
Do I hang with girls more? Yes!

I asked these questions so far to myself to see If I'm transgender or not? Still don't know.

That is where I am I have a check listen of things I go through almost on a daily bases and I am still not sure, even though part of me wants to be transgendered if that makes any sense.

It would make things easier to understand at the very least.

I'm still confused. If I'm transgender or if I'm not, I'm cool with it. I just was hoping this would give me the answer. Usually I'm pretty at getting the answers I need about something.

From what I've found in my own self reflecting is that it is not an easy answer. Most filled with doubts, fears and uncertainties.

Some things on my list are.

Do I enjoy posing as a female online? Yes I do
Have I wished I was a girl? Yes
I am ok being a guy? Maybe some times yes other times no

Recently I find myself relating more to being transgender, and I present my self as female online, in games when ever I know I can get away with it.

But there are times where I am just me, and I don't see myself as transgender.

Quote from: Larisa1983 on November 07, 2013, 08:23:00 PM
I asked myself these questions.

Do girls or guys annoy you more? Guys
Me Kissing boys - gross to me
Give up my girl stuff? - I can't give it up
Wearing girls clothes - feels normal like myself
Becoming full girl - not easy. Leaving behind my girl side would be hard.
Again becoming full girl -  at times yes forever but other times no
Going blonde - yes want to!
Jaw adjustment -  yes want now
No facial hair or chest hair forever - yes
Want long hair like girls - YES!!!
Comfortable with my girl side - def yes!
Mom dressing me as a girl at 5 for Halloween -not weird
Dress up? - fun!!
Wanted breasts before? - ya but forever not sure
Ever been depressed by not having breasts - yes at times before
Never having guy parts? - girls pee to
Did you love playing with barbies at 5  - yes!!
Wearing dresses - I'd do miniskirts
Pink or blue? I like both
Jewelry?  - fun!
Have I shaved my legs and arms before? Yes but more often my arms!
Shave my armpits? Yes in winter spring fall often but summer no
Call myself a girl? Yes have before
Get called a man men or sir - makes me annoyed
Call myself a woman? Never but I've been called it before and not offended
Sad I can't go out as a girl? Ya I am
Sad I wasn't born a girl? At times yes
Easy to dress as a girl? Yes
Easy to undress back to guy? No
Do I compare myself to girls often? Yes
Do I hang with girls more? Yes!

I asked these questions so far to myself to see If I'm transgender or not? Still don't know.

You know what?  Most of your list is about gender presentation and cultural expectations.  What about your identity?  How do you see yourself, unfettered from the world?

Tell me, if you could wake up tomorrow morning in the body of your dreams, what would it be?

Quote from: Jamie de la Rosa on November 07, 2013, 11:44:15 PM
You know what?  Most of your list is about gender presentation and cultural expectations.  What about your identity?  How do you see yourself, unfettered from the world?

Tell me, if you could wake up tomorrow morning in the body of your dreams, what would it be?

Well that gets right to the point lol. For me, female, easy. Everything else has to do with managing that reality.

Quote from: Jamie de la Rosa on November 07, 2013, 11:44:15 PM
You know what?  Most of your list is about gender presentation and cultural expectations.  What about your identity?  How do you see yourself, unfettered from the world?

Tell me, if you could wake up tomorrow morning in the body of your dreams, what would it be?

Yeah, I know lots of cis women who would be saying no to most questions on that list. Not saying that I doubt your identity at all, but there are much harder questions to ask here. Ones that aren't even so easy to find words for. But it does come down to identity and feelings more than checking off how many stereotypes you fit.

One thing I was thinking on last night.

One reason I like to present as a female online is I generally enjoy people "treating" me as a girl. It is not like they treating me like some china doll, but they will say things, act a different way then if they think I am a guy. The amazing thing is I don't act any differently, as in I don't have "boy mode" "girl mode". I will say and do things regardless what people see me as, but again one reasons is I just really like people to "see and think" of me as female online. (When I can get away with it, that is the main issue being per-everything.)

So maybe ask yourself how do you want the world see you, try experimenting online if you haven't see if you like it more when people see you as a boy or a girl, or even openly state that your transgender. (It is the most wonderful thing about the internet is you can be anonymous - it is also the worse thing buuut that is a different topic all together.))

Personally baby, when you start asking yourself these questions, uh, there is no question. It is something you feel inside and not a checklist that makes you aware of the need to transition. For me it has been a NEED for forty years. An inner driving command that can only be held inside until it breaks free on it's own as in my case. Once the flood started nothing could stop it. Only my opinion though.