My week actually been pretty good, I am still on my school and my psycologist actually had made me feel better the couple of few months to cope with my depression and anxiouty in a way so I can focus on school and move foward. which sure is good
he also came out as gay said he normally dont do that but he kinda did because there where some of the things I mention which he also could relate to like the comming out and so.
from advice of him I also got more open about my problems, I was kinda embarrest and full of guilt in the start, because of the taboo and I thought maybe they would say that my depression or anxiouty where simple me being Lazy or something like that, but now I decided to be honest about it when people ask.
So usunally I hang around the girls in my class and theres only 1 of them who knows im trans the rest belive im just a guy, even when they know im a activist they dont know anything about what I do.
its not that I think they wont accept it, its more that my year is ending soon anyway so I kinda dont feel like dealing with any kind of transphobic up around my final exames and so..
anyway. One of the girls who don't know have a couple of diffrent problems which seams simular to me.
She kinda feel handicap because she got problems with her bag, She have sleeping problems and winter depression and she dont trust psycologist.
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it all something I more or less can reconize from my past experience. I also had depression, and tecnically im handicapped by dignose, I had bag and lung pain and problems due to binding, and sleeping problems which I worked on for years, not to mention I neither really have much trust in psycologist since I been to so many with bad experience when I where younger, who misunderstood me because non of then knew anything about what transgender was or how to deal with it in a proper way.
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anyway.
as mention she dont know Im trans but I told her I also had sleeping problems and depression and so and it also the reason why I hadnt gone so often in school but it helped with the psycologist even when I neither had much luck with those in my past.
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She said depression is something you could deal with, but she understood the anxiouty specially when I mention about my friends suicide, yet she still doubt her trust in psycologist and if it had to be one it had to be a woman because she dont trust men due to some traumatic experience or something (which I kinda belive to be famely abuse).
im not sure on what kind of life she had but
as we went for the class she said she think She had a difficult life, I said I belive everyone has there own things who make life difficult, she said She belived she had a lot harder life than most people, and that her views are diffrent and if she spoke openly people would be shocked. she said "exemple I cant trust men."
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I am not really sure what to say, but it made me feel abit wierd like im just a naive person who dont understand anything about woman or having a hard life or strange opinions. I think I understand hardness of life pretty well. even the hardness of womens life but she probably wouldnt belive me if I simple said that unless I told her the whole trans stuff but im not sure it even would turn out good, maybe she would give me the "I trust you card" but then she wouldnt view me as a man? or maybe even it it turned out good being trans is very diffrent struggle than famely issues even when I also have friends who dealing with that and I had dealt with it for the casual comming out drama most of us go thought
So in a way due to my gender it seams as im limited to even help her out.
what would you do?
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btw hope you all have a good weekend there
