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When does "dating" become "a relationship?"

Started by Constance, November 26, 2013, 10:20:34 AM

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Constance

So, I have a question.

At what point does dating become a relationship?

I have a date tonight, my third with this person, someone I met through OKCupid. We don't (yet?) have any kind commitment to each other, and when she posted on FB about our second date she describe me as a "friend" only. Well, this seems fair as I don't think of her as a girlfriend or SO at this time. I can't honestly say I'm in love with her, but I do enjoy being with her.

Knowing all that, should I proceed as if we are exclusive? According to Online Dating for Dummies (I checked it out from my local library), it's not uncommon to be pursuing multiple profiles at once. In fact, it might even be considered to be the norm.

Xhianil

Personally i say the first "i love you" makes it official.
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Danielle Emmalee

I wouldn't assume anything until there is stated exclusivity.  Not so sure for polyamorous relationships.
Discord, I'm howlin' at the moon
And sleepin' in the middle of a summer afternoon
Discord, whatever did we do
To make you take our world away?

Discord, are we your prey alone,
Or are we just a stepping stone for taking back the throne?
Discord, we won't take it anymore
So take your tyranny away!
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MadelineB

A highly ethical and compassionate person can date more than one person simultaneously. In fact it can take the pressure off and avoid the hothouse effect. By not looking to one person to fulfill all our romantic needs, it lets us appreciate each person while keeping our head clear of the madness that can ensue when our starving inner child thinks shes found a new mommy and daddy in someone.

Naturally people you are dating this way will morph into friends/activity partners, and main squeezes. Main squeeze happens when two people find they want to explore a deep dyad. Sometimes just following a crush to see where it leads, sometimes because attachment happens and you both want to start coming home to each other.
History, despite its wrenching pain, cannot be unlived, but if faced with courage, need not be lived again.
~Maya Angelou

Personal Blog: Madeline's B-Hive
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Ms. OBrien CVT

*giggles  When it is posted on Facebook "In A Relationship with".  *giggles

On the serious side, I would say when it is agreed upon to be mutually exclusive.

  
It does not take courage or bravery to change your gender.  It takes fear of living one more day in the wrong one.~me
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Xhianil

Quote from: Ms. OBrien CVT on November 26, 2013, 01:08:35 PM
On the serious side, I would say when it is agreed upon to be mutually exclusive.

Not all couples are exclusive.
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Constance

This is all great feedback. Thanks, folks.

Xhianil, yes not all couples are exclusive. So, this is something that I might need to discuss with my current dating partner.