Quote from: Riley on December 25, 2013, 07:28:33 AM
But sometimes I like being a girl

^That told me you're not ready to medically transition. Socially you might want to play around with it but with you saying that sometimes you like being a girl you're not ready for hormones or surgeries. No medical professional in their right mind would ok you to take any steps to medically transition.

How you feel is not wrong, do know that. You need to explore your options before you consider anything medical. I wish I would have liked myself even an iota before transition. I hated her, everything about her. The only way I could survive was to free myself of her. If you have the possibility of living your life and being happy with yourself without transitioning then by all means go that route.

I agree with many here that transitioning is the right path for many of us, but I don't think it's "always" the answer.  There are some that have been able to deal with their dysphoria without needing to take that step and that's fine.  At the end of the day, you need to find the path that makes you happy.  Therefore, you don't "have" to transition nor do you "have" to remain as you are, all of that is up to you.  While transitioning is right for me and many here, none of us can say what's best for you.  Therefore, if you are uncertain about what to do and feel these gender issues are bothering you, going to a therapist may help you make a well thought out decision.  You need to discover what's most important to you in life and measure your feelings in a serious way.  Committing to a transition and/or a career are both major decisions.  It doesn't hurt to put some heavy thought into your lives direction as it can only benefit you in the long run.   Good luck with everything and hope all turns out well!

Riley,

All my life I had my heart set out for the military, and I enlisted in the Army on my 18th birthday. I was shipped off to Fort Jackson on July 22nd after a heartfelt goodbye from my family and was shoved into processing. On the last day of processing, most of my battalion was was cramped into the chapel for what they call the moment of truth, which is exactly what it sounds like. People lined up to tell our 1st Srg and Battalion Commander things we may have left out or lied about to enlist, threatening serious consequences later if we didn't disclose this information now. Parking Tickets, former arrests, medical information, etc. I sat there for most of the time, trying to keep myself composed and debating on what I should do. I've wanted this for so long, and at that point, I wasn't entirely sure if I was trans or not, but my uncertainty is really what pushed me to tell. It was only when I was talking with the 1st Srg and Commander I finally accepted that I was trans and I would be miserable for a very long time, had I decided to keep quiet, and probably would have ended up doing something incredibly stupid and selfish.

I do have conflicting feelings over the decision sometimes. I know I could have made it through basic, I know I would've been great at my job. I'd had enough money for T and surgery later on, but I couldn't do it. I feel like 18, now pushing 19, years is long enough for me to have this consent ache in my chest because I don't look how I feel, about how my voice squeaks when I talk to loud or my family and close friends not seeing me for who I am and treating me differently then how i should be treated. Although I may be bitter about my situation, I believe it was the right choice for me, and I don't regret it. I threw away a very stable and respectable career and I'm still not happy where I'm at right now in my life, I have a lot of people supporting me who I care about very much and have no where to go but up. I'm positive things will get better and I'll find a new goal to shoot for, or maybe try to the military again later on in my life.

But I guess to me, if you have to lie about who you are, I don't think it's worth it. Especially for something as public as that can be. Like others have said, it's still possible for you to get a singing career if you medically transition. Therapy is a highly recommended idea before pursuing either, I think.

-RJ (my name is Riley too! )

Quoteo_o Ashley =/= Riley.

My last online faux pas of 2013, I'm sure.....ish 

I'm more of an analogue geek,I don't do all this computamabobs. Yep, thats it.

Hope you're feeling better though, Riley!