I really want to do my nails in black, but that thing does not come out easily, and I have another family lunch on January 1st.  What to do... Pick another color and remove it later? Skip the lunch since I need to be in man mode? More inclined to this.

Quote from: T-Virus inside on December 30, 2013, 07:36:46 AM
I really want to do my nails in black, but that thing does not come out easily, and I have another family lunch on January 1st.  What to do... Pick another color and remove it later? Skip the lunch since I need to be in man mode? More inclined to this.

I'd suggest skipping the lunch. Screw your family if they expect you to pretend to be something you're not.

Quote from: Amelia Pond on December 30, 2013, 08:09:39 AM
I'd suggest skipping the lunch. Screw your family if they expect you to pretend to be something you're not.

Really?

How about working through it for the time being with a little compromise? That is unless of course you are the center of the universe which is a prescription for loneliness and ostracism from those that mean anything to you. There are ways to finesse family members through you're transition rather than suddenly going off in their face like a nuclear bomb from out of nowhere!

Quote from: Shantel on December 30, 2013, 09:20:27 AM
Really?

How about working through it for the time being with a little compromise? That is unless of course you are the center of the universe which is a prescription for loneliness and ostracism from those that mean anything to you. There are ways to finesse family members through you're transition rather than suddenly going off in their face like a nuclear bomb from out of nowhere!

Yes, really. If they cared about her, they'd accept her for who she is. If they want to be unloving, they don't deserve to have her in their lives. It's not healthy keeping toxic people in one's life.

Quote from: Amelia Pond on December 30, 2013, 09:39:28 AM
Yes, really. If they cared about her, they'd accept her for who she is. If they want to be unloving, they don't deserve to have her in their lives. It's not healthy keeping toxic people in one's life.

Not all family members are toxic simply because they don't understand what's going on, there are ways to finesse them through one's transitional plans unless one is just a bully and bulldozes everyone out of their life in which case it might be better to fall headlong into a well because it's going to get cold and lonely either way.

Still, they finance part of my rent and help with food and fruit, plus I depend of them for things such as getting a car lift, lending me a suitcase or whatever they still can do for me. Not to mention that I could lose the house anytime and be forced to be there and keep the circus act as long as I am unemployed

It's the same as with the GD clinic. I would like to avoid seeing them and dance their conga, but they cover my HRT and SRS. The clinic has agreed to take them in consultation and see if they can accept things a bit.

You want me to present male in front of your neighbours or a pair of mentally damaged grandparents OK, but when we are alone? You could start calling me Noah for once. I don't enjoy my old name to be used with total and absolute propriety, less male pronouns. So I'd rather skip it. I will still be severely unstable, and...

Let's face it: I'd rather stay at my place that suffering a heavy lunch the rest of the day.


BTW, I keep telling them: "there will be a time when I won't be able to hide my breasts? This won't work forever".

It's a pathetic situation, but as long as I can't provide full independent and backup plan, that's it. In the meantime, the less I see them, the better. Because as you know, I don't take kindly to breaking female presentation and full time. Keep in mind that I'm aiming for SRS as soon as I reach the one year full time.

Quote from: Shantel on December 30, 2013, 09:51:29 AM
Not all family members are toxic simply because they don't understand what's going on, there are ways to finesse them through one's transitional plans unless one is just a bully and bulldozes everyone out of their life in which case it might be better to fall headlong into a well because it's going to get cold and lonely either way.

Family isn't about blood relations, it's about people who love each other, regardless of what they do or don't understand. It sounds like her "family" doesn't care. If they don't care, then why do they deserve to be in her life?

I never said they're toxic just because they don't understand but they are toxic if they refuse to show you love and compassion. If they cared, they'd try to understand rather than trying to force her to appear as something she's not.

Quote from: T-Virus inside on December 30, 2013, 10:00:58 AM
Still, they finance part of my rent and help with food and fruit, plus I depend of them for things such as getting a car lift, lending me a suitcase or whatever they still can do for me. Not to mention that I could lose the house anytime and be forced to be there and keep the circus act as long as I am unemployed

It's the same as with the GD clinic. I would like to avoid seeing them and dance their conga, but they cover my HRT and SRS. The clinic has agreed to take them in consultation and see if they can accept things a bit.

You want me to present male in front of your neighbours or a pair of mentally damaged grandparents OK, but when we are alone? You could start calling me Noah for once. I don't enjoy my old name to be used with total and absolute propriety, less male pronouns. So I'd rather skip it. I will still be severely unstable, and...

Let's face it: I'd rather stay at my place that suffering a heavy lunch the rest of the day.


BTW, I keep telling them: "there will be a time when I won't be able to hide my breasts? This won't work forever".

It's a pathetic situation, but as long as I can't provide full independent and backup plan, that's it. In the meantime, the less I see them, the better. Because as you know, I don't take kindly to breaking female presentation and full time. Keep in mind that I'm aiming for SRS as soon as I reach the one year full time.

I can understand keeping them in your life for the time being but I agree that you'd be better off skipping the lunch. I'm sorry that they're being so unreasonable. *HUG*

You know what I hate about black nail polish? It's the hardest to do plain color, the worst stains, and looks awful if you screw up.

Sure, I could pay 6€ and get it done, but nooo, here I am, doing each hand separately to avoid risks and be able to use the other....

I can't believe that it is almost 1 pm and I've only been awake around a half hour. I was snoooooozing.

Thinking about my friend who tried to off himself last night...

Quote from: Emo on December 30, 2013, 11:52:58 PM
Thinking about my friend who tried to off himself last night...

Ouch, I hope your friend found help.

Hes too stubborn to go for help...

Quote from: Emo on December 31, 2013, 12:11:22 AM
Hes too stubborn to go for help...

Maybe the help has to go to him. I never figured out how to do that.

I tried to be there for him.. I helped him get through it once.. But i had to sleep.... And that could have cost him his life...

Emo, you going to sleep will never cost him his life. You are not responsible for him. If he offs himself, it is because he made a choice.

If i can affect a choice by being there to stop him then it is my responsibility to act on that option.

He is not your responsibility. Sleep is a human need. If you don't take care of yourself, you won't be any help to him anyway.
I don't mean to sound harsh, but I know from experience that... things I can't find words for. I'll get back to on that once I've had some sleep.

I'm thinking about gender and unusual-ness and wondering if I should write a post.

Im not responsible for my friends?
Isnt that what friendship is?

No.  Your friends are responsible for their own actions.  All you can do is try your best. 

No, it's not. Not that I'm all that knowledgable on the subject of friends, but I know depression.
I know that, if you don't take care of yourself, you won't be able to help anyone. "You can't get water from an empty well." I also know that threatening to kill oneself if they don't meet one's demands is abusive, so it is also a bad idea to put that kind of pressure on oneself.
I know that this is his journey to make. (Sorry about the cliche.) Support is fine, but he needs to figure out how this works for him. Trust me, I know this from experience. (Sorry about weird wording. I need sleep and am bad with words at the best of times.)