So,
I just was sitting down to eat and my sister shows up..
I finish eating and my wife and sister are sitting on the couch across from me and my sister says " so how are you doing"
And I am like.. great but busy.. just too dang busy business is good..
I thought they were acting strange then my wife said she met with my sister because I had been so upset and feeling so alone and felt I needed to get more support.
Then I said.. so you know?? and then I started to shake and my wife said my face turned red..
My wife was so afraid I would be mad but I had been wanting to tell my sister.
We all hugged and my sister said she would be there for me and that everything would be ok..
My sister is gay.. so she knows how it feels to come out.
We sat and talked for hours...my wife did it because she also felt alone so now we both have someone that knows what we are going through.
It was a beautiful thing... I feel blessed.
Carrie

 

I think that says it!

That's a lovely thing to happen. It's good to have such support from probably the two most important people in your life.

Good luck

Caroline

Having acceptance and a good support network makes this so much easier. It also makes it easier to handle the losses, if they occur, and they often do. A few of us get through transition unscathed but most of experience losses, ranging from very small to very large. Having that support network helps me get through this. I'd imagine it helps others as well.

I am so happy for you.

Amazing! Wonderful! Thanks for sharing.

Jane

Fantastic Carrie. Hugs.

I'm so happy for you Carrie .

I know you weren't looking to transition a while ago, so it must be a wild and scary ride coming this far and realising where you want to go from here. But it is made easier with support. So I hope the support from those close to you continues.

xx

Thanks Everyone..

SammyRose,
Your right I really was fighting this.
I have to admit, being on HRT has given me clarity I did not know could come..I see my endo in the morning..
Should be interesting to see what my blood work looks like
After almost six weeks I am seeing things happen.. I feel so different but in such a wonderful way.
Carrie

Apologies if this sounds presumptuous, it's not intended to be.

Some time ago when you were talking about HRT without transition, I know where my money was in terms of which path you could find yourself going. HRT opens a door that can never be closed again.

That clarity you refer to is only the start. Like a moment in your mind where you can pause and reassess everything. From there, mental changes can be so subtle yet so profound. Although I really don't know how or if that occurs on a low dose of E.

All the best for tomorrow.

xx

Hey SammyRose,
Really appreciate your feedback.
When you say HRT opens a door that can never be closed what does that mean?? Please clarify

I bet what you meant is that once started if you are truly trans you can't stop you are right.  I have found that I am changing..a lot actually.
A new world opened up for me.. a freedom I have never known.. its really hard to explain.
I like all the changes.. I like my body better. I am living for the future again..
I have always been a half glass full person, positive and don't stay in the dumps.. I just can't live in the dumps however when my trans issue hit me last September it kicked my butt.. seriously..
At this point I know if I stop what will happen and its not a pretty picture of my future.  Sure I wish I could somehow just come out of this and stay male for my  family and others but I suppose I am better off alive...  this is the hardest challenge of my life so far and I have had some pretty big hurdles to overcome.
I bought a plane thinking it would help to fly more.. sold it! 
Whats weird is if I see pics of the old me.. I get sick...and get upset.. I have lost so much weight and look so much better and happier.. I look 20 years younger..
I feel whole for the first time really in my entire life but then all the external stuff hurts so much.
Seems we trade the gain for other types of pain.. like hurting the ones we love most that just can't take it...so painful and unbearable.. 
My sis calls me sis now.. first time ever been called want I am inside.. we are getting to be so close..


Just curious was your money on that I would not transition?
At this point I know I can never go back to the old me.. just not going to happen...ever.
Really appreciate you. Thanks for your feedback SammyRose.
Therapy tomorrow.. so much to chat about.
BTW my endo ramped up my dosage and I did not argue
Carrie
ps my eyes have changed I had a eye appt yesterday and shape of eyes changed so my script change a little but that could be due to weight loss

Hi Carrie

HRT is magical, especially on our minds... That's the proverbial door that opens, having the right hormones coursing through the body. As you say, if someone is trans and doing the right thing with HRT, they'll know pretty quickly. There's nothing like it!

It's a scary road ahead. Faced with a path with no future, or a path one that comes with so much promise & some pain for others... I'm truly sorry that this is something you have to face... I was lucky, no wife, no kids, no dependents. I had a girlfriend ( who I lost in this ), but that's all. I really don't envy women in your situation, and I don't really have any advice from any experience to give. I'm sorry. But with love and support, there are many women here who do transition. I'm sure you know the usual outcomes. Not that I'm suggesting anything here... And I hope your sister and partner keep talking, I think your sister could really make a huge difference to both of you.

From your earlier posts, it was kind of clear that you really are just a girl... And well, taking HRT, there's no going back. Or at least I've never heard or seen any other girl start facing dysphoria & trans issues head on to the point of taking HRT without going further in terms of a social transition. So that's where my money was... that you would end up transitioning socially. Funnily enough, I've a friend locally struggling to 'contain the girl'. I'd be pretty certain that she will end up transitioning too.

Good luck with your therapist! Such a trying time... And congratulations for the increase in HRT. You can really feel it when T has been annihilated.

xx

SammyRose,
Thanks so much and OMG yes I am all girl..and she is out in charge now..
I eat to live now.. I work out hard have changed everything.
Nothing could keep me from taking HRT now.. I have heard that before but no way I can stop so you had your money in the right place.
My sister found pics of me when I was young and they sure looked feminine..
She gave me my Wednesday shot.. and I take the same stuff she does.. kinda funny..
And yes she is a blessing to me and my wife.. I am having to come to terms with my life changing but we will always be best of friends.. for sure..
We have had basically a perfect marriage.. never really fought and always like doing things together.. we like the same things too..
I am going to go slow with the change over.. so she can adjust.. if she can...
I guy in me still fights back a little.. like saying what the hell are you doing...  and I say to myself I can't believe this is happening to me.. and that I can't believe I let it catch up to me.. I was so in denial just so I could survive but I was really miserable and scared of my future before I came out.. now I just want to be me finally.
My sister is really taking this thing seriously .. since she has been through so much herself being gay... she knows the drill so she is helping me to build a support system..
Take care and thanks girl.
Carrie

Sweetheart that is so freakin awesome!!! Although my wife says she is cool with it and she is the only one that knows having just one more like that is going to make it so much easier. You are truly blessed! Its great when things just work themselves out like that.

Big Hugs
Norma Lynne

Thank you Norma,
It is so cool to have my sis on my side pulling for me.. we have never been so close.. its amazing.
Carrie