In today's apartment hunt...

Oh, God. I could have expected a dead grandpa inside. I had to make the guy change the status from "well kept" to "Needs repairs". Nothing could be saved.

The letter "wasn't good enough"

I feel like plowing over a wall, or six.

The 4% chance I gave myself of not walking out the door with a script, happened. I have the worst of luck.

Quote from: Willow on January 27, 2014, 02:35:42 PM
The letter "wasn't good enough"

I feel like plowing over a wall, or six.

The 4% chance I gave myself of not walking out the door with a script, happened. I have the worst of luck.

Seriously? What a load of horse crap! Did they at least tell you what the letter was missing?

Quote from: birkin on January 27, 2014, 02:37:58 PMSeriously? What a load of horse crap! Did they at least tell you what the letter was missing?

Yes. Direct citations and quotes from the WPATH documents.
Like, are those even necessary? I mean, the letters listed the requirements and stated that I had met all of them, and then some. So since they weren't quoted and cited, I have to wait another week, at least.
I'm quelling my anger with two mozzarella bacon cheeseburgers with pickles from the caf. The only caf on campus where you can get whatever you want on a burger, but only from 2-5 and 8-10.
I'm still going to be pissed. I don't know if I can survive any longer. From the day that my therapist said she was going to write the letter, 9 days ago, I've been dying inside a little each day. Less so knowing that the beginning was in sight. Now, I've died inside more than I have every day in the last month, since I went full time.

Sounds like a bit of a power trip to me. But hang in there. *hugs* I know the day I was set to get mine I couldn't even wait two days to get the free samples of Androgel, I was willing to pay a few hundred to start a couple days earlier. But in the long run, that couple days won't really matter. You'll get your hormones soon enough and one day you'll be like "omg, I'm almost two years on them" and look back to today like it was a past life.

Quote from: birkin on January 27, 2014, 03:05:17 PMSounds like a bit of a power trip to me. But hang in there. *hugs* I know the day I was set to get mine I couldn't even wait two days to get the free samples of Androgel, I was willing to pay a few hundred to start a couple days earlier. But in the long run, that couple days won't really matter. You'll get your hormones soon enough and one day you'll be like "omg, I'm almost two years on them" and look back to today like it was a past life.

This could be a matter of a few weeks, a few months, a few years, or a few lifetimes. I don't know how long t'll take for this to be resolved. It seems every time I go to see this doctor, she says "well there's one thing missing..."

Water heater is only 5+ years old and was given its last rites today.

Hemorrhaging yet more cash, although this is a drop in the bucket compared to last week.  UGH!

Quote from: Willow on January 27, 2014, 03:11:23 PM
This could be a matter of a few weeks, a few months, a few years, or a few lifetimes. I don't know how long t'll take for this to be resolved. It seems every time I go to see this doctor, she says "well there's one thing missing..."

Anyone else you could see by chance? Like another doctor at the campus clinic? (it's fairly common for people to ask if Dr so and so is working). This one sounds like she's being ridiculous with little details.

Quote from: birkin on January 27, 2014, 03:14:37 PMAnyone else you could see by chance? Like another doctor at the campus clinic? (it's fairly common for people to ask if Dr so and so is working). This one sounds like she's being ridiculous with little details.

Nope. This is the only doctor which is authorised to work with trans patients on HRT and the like.

I think my therapist knows what she's doing; she's been working with trans patients for 15 years. The school doctor only two.
There's a rumour amongst my trans friend (which the large majority see her) that she's incompetent on trans care, and was only given the position because she has an FTM son.
I'd ask what they did to get on HRT, only I did, and the majority had to take a route which I don't want to first, and then that convinced the doctor that they were ready.
It's almost as if she's encouraging us to do something illegal to gain her trust.

Sounds like she maybe doing these things to test how much you want it, I guess in her eyes if they are desperate enough to self medicate(I assume that is what you are referring to) then they are ready. But in my mind that is irresponsible of her.

Quote from: Charley Bea(EmeraldP) on January 27, 2014, 03:32:12 PMSounds like she maybe doing these things to test how much you want it, I guess in her eyes if they are desperate enough to self medicate(I assume that is what you are referring to) then they are ready. But in my mind that is irresponsible of her.

Extremely so. I'm strictly by the book. Doesn't mean I don't think out the box, I just don't do anything illegal.

If I wasn't in the caf, and didn't want to go across the street in the snow to my room, I'd be there crying my eyes out.
I tried not to at the clinic. Maybe if I had, she would have written a prescription.
Not saying that faking tears to get your way is good, I was genuinely sad about it. Angry too. I've done so much work, and I keep getting told "just a little more!" but I can't do anything more on my own. What else do you expect me to do? The only thing I have left that I can do short of hormones is use the women's bathroom to shower, but strictly speaking I can't do that without risking the very likely case that I'd be arrested for harassment. Take off the makeup, chest padding, and wig, and I'm unmistakably clearly a guy in appearance. Even with those things, some people don't see it and question what I am doing in the women's bathroom or whatnot. Hence why I'm so scared to use the bathroom at the Union. Not only does it sound quite lavish, there's a huge lounge outside it, but I'm afraid since it's considered to be a safe space for women that I'd be kicked out if anyone noticed my male features and thought I was male.


This is turning into the same thing that happened with my mother. I was the one doing all the giving and she would just take, and cry her eyes out whenever I mentioned anything trans related. She wasn't willing to compromise on any ground. And now she doesn't talk to me. That can't happen with my doctor. I NEED hormones, sooner than later. I'd pay everything I have to start today. Of course that's only $16; off insurance, I'm told (by same doctor) that they're "only" $80-100 per month.

Quote from: Willow on January 27, 2014, 03:11:23 PM
This could be a matter of a few weeks, a few months, a few years, or a few lifetimes. I don't know how long t'll take for this to be resolved. It seems every time I go to see this doctor, she says "well there's one thing missing..."

Took me one freaking year to get my prescription. In the end I took the not so recommended route, but It was not cheap, easy, and spent a  good deal of time with a messed intestine. But hey, at least you are much younger than me. When you are on it, it will be much much better and effective.

I'd like to show you a Day 1 RLE with no HRT photo so that you cheer up, but it's too embarrrassing... maybe one day...

Ok, whatever:

http://i.imgur.com/z9lsohp.jpg

This was my first ever time out, before putting the breastforms and make up. I've never been that scared in my life.

http://www.amazon.com/Power-Positive-Thinking-Norman-Vincent/dp/0671581864

Haha, I couldn't figure out why that book would make Jamie unhappy, but I'm thinking it must be a response to the unhappiness in the thread. I was very confused.

Quote from: AppleJack on January 27, 2014, 05:16:06 PM
Took me one freaking year to get my prescription. In the end I took the not so recommended route, but It was not cheap, easy, and spent a  good deal of time with a messed intestine. But hey, at least you are much younger than me. When you are on it, it will be much much better and effective.

I'd like to show you a Day 1 RLE with no HRT photo so that you cheer up, but it's too embarrrassing... maybe one day...

Ok, whatever:

http://i.imgur.com/z9lsohp.jpg

This was my first ever time out, before putting the breastforms and make up. I've never been that scared in my life.

I can tell you were scared, it was written all over your face, you were practically hiding under the wig! ((Hugs))

I work with this guy who will not shut up... its always ->-bleeped-<- this and gay that and constantly talking about other ppl calling them homos and butt F ers and hes the ugly rat looking douche ( pardon my french) it just drives me absolutely crazy it would barely take any effort to plant his ass but I have to bite my tongue all day everyday.

Quote from: Jill F on January 27, 2014, 03:13:23 PM
Water heater is only 5+ years old and was given its last rites today.

Hemorrhaging yet more cash, although this is a drop in the bucket compared to last week.  UGH!

You just reminded me I have a 15 year old water that I need to replace within this year because it could leak any day and flood the basment.

Quote from: Jenelle327 on January 27, 2014, 06:01:18 PM
I work with this guy who will not shut up... its always ->-bleeped-<- this and gay that and constantly talking about other ppl calling them homos and butt F ers and hes the ugly rat looking douche ( pardon my french) it just drives me absolutely crazy it would barely take any effort to plant his ass but I have to bite my tongue all day everyday.

I wouldn't be surprised if this person has something he's in denial about, regarding his own sexuality.

Quote from: Jenelle327 on January 27, 2014, 06:01:18 PM
I work with this guy who will not shut up... its always ->-bleeped-<- this and gay that and constantly talking about other ppl calling them homos and butt F ers and hes the ugly rat looking douche ( pardon my french) it just drives me absolutely crazy it would barely take any effort to plant his ass but I have to bite my tongue all day everyday.

Methinks he doth protest too much.  I'll bet his hard drive is actually full of guy-guy porn. 

Anyway, sounds potentially like a hostile workplace environment that you don't have to put up with.

Medical insurance claim denied.  HRT, everything.  If they think I'm going away without a fight...