I kinda really like it a really very whole lotsa' bunches!

Nobody else seems to understand in real life.

Online, everything is golden.

Have you tried getting into contact with other transgender people? I know they're not necessarily more understanding, but personally at my college I talk to a group of transgender people and they're all really helpful in just listening and understanding. I know not everyone has easy access to transgender support groups like that, but I know it can be really great to have people in real life that 'get' you.

Quote from: Euterpe on February 05, 2014, 11:49:46 PM
Have you tried getting into contact with other transgender people? I know they're not necessarily more understanding, but personally at my college I talk to a group of transgender people and they're all really helpful in just listening and understanding. I know not everyone has easy access to transgender support groups like that, but I know it can be really great to have people in real life that 'get' you.

Agreed. Get to know some people IRL who you can relate to.

I feel ya. That's for sure. I've found a place close. But no courage.

Quote from: Norma Lynne on February 06, 2014, 12:32:59 AM
I feel ya. That's for sure. I've found a place close. But no courage.

What??? You can do it. It's easy. It's also safe. I was nervous the first time I went and didn't know what to expect and stuff. But it's not that bad. You should go.

Good idea, I may just have to start one. My community is large enough but relay her informal about these things.

transition definitely isnt for the faint of heart. youll get there


i get it though. people really dont seem to understand why its so important. its nice in a way, for my experience. tends to make things easier when people arent really interested either way. (just go for it why are you waiting? kinda thing) but it can be disheartening.

life is precious because each is unique. dont get down about it. its a waste of precious time

Oh, I am mid transition. And thank you for the positive reminder. Happiness is awesome. It isn't as awesome if you feel that way all the time and I started this thread on a rough day. Those rough days do make the happy days more enjoyable.

I am at the point where my emotions have switched sides from male to female and my mind is kinda' at war with itself. It is taking information in and reacting to it in a remarkably different way. Sometimes I feel like I do not know myself. But I like the person I am meeting.

It is all kinds of weird in my head these last few days but it is a good weird.

Aloha,
Tori

Just saying: joining up in an activity that you like (sport, knitting, what the eff ever) which is inherently social by nature and exclusively for women is pretty much the best thing I ever did. No amount of online 'support' really helped me, personally but IRL: it was like walking from a room with no air to a fresh, cool spring morning. Juuust my 2¢.

Well put. Now what to do...

(Tori puts her thinking beret on.)

I do like this website, but it has proven most helpful when tackling subjects I have never put into words, either to help others or just to put it out there as a question. Therapy and coming out to friends works in much the same way.

Actually, long form blogging has been the best outlet so far, but I hear you loud and clear Victoria, a female social circle would be the bee's knees.

I went to a social thing in Sydney last week, just a small group of trans ladies and a couple of cis ladies (partners) - it was just dinner at a club, but it was great to meet and chat with them. Not quite the same thing as a support group I suppose but it was very empowering all the same.

Quote from: Tori on February 05, 2014, 11:35:38 PM

Online, everything is golden.

You've understood how TS forums work, good for you!

It's something completely different from real life, including the 'while on HRT magically shrinking feet and magically shrinking in height' stories (/MTF fairytales.....strangely without mentioning shrinking hands or shortening arms...so I guess the 'shrinking feet/height MTF' resemble gorilla's IRL ;-)

Ok, I will allow you that post, but do not take the Tooth Fairy away from me.

Plausibility and probability are worth considering in cases such as these.

So is optimism.

Now someone get me a knife and fork, I can't cut through this sarcasm with a spoon.

I have had quite a bit of trepidation regarding support groups. Thing is, I think it could be helpful to reach out to more transwomen IRL, very loosely associated with my social group is an FTM but beyond that I don't really know other transpeople IRL, but I am not sure I would enjoy the experience. I have some strong opinions about how I want to do things, and my experience online has been that people who do things differently out of concern for me or to validate their own choices go out of their way to try and tell me I am doing it wrong and I need to do it like they do. This is unproductive to me. Online it is easy to handle, my online mettle was strengthened by playing Eve Online so much, that almost nothing can make me feel all that bad online, but IRL it isn't all that hard to make me cry.

I think that near Washington, DC there is more than one group for MTFs, but still I have doubts on if meeting other transwomen would be good or bad for my morale. I have some very supportive friends, of course they have no real understanding of what I go through they don't need to understand they know what I want and they know my "lady pills" as they call them make me even more emotional than before. So my worry is, not that I wouldn't get anything from a support group, but more I am worried about people not being nice, or judging me; perhaps IRL it is different but online I see so many people who are "->-bleeped-<-r than thou" and who are older and seem to have some abject hatred of younger people who are closer to passing (am 28 that is kinda young I guess), these sorts of social dynamics worry me, I don't think I could really deal with such attitudes face to face. Though to be fair SuzifromMD and ThePhoenix both seem really nice and live closeish to me IIRC, so they don't seem so scary.

Quote from: Hikari on February 08, 2014, 09:29:24 AM
I have had quite a bit of trepidation regarding support groups. Thing is, I think it could be helpful to reach out to more transwomen IRL, very loosely associated with my social group is an FTM but beyond that I don't really know other transpeople IRL, but I am not sure I would enjoy the experience. I have some strong opinions about how I want to do things, and my experience online has been that people who do things differently out of concern for me or to validate their own choices go out of their way to try and tell me I am doing it wrong and I need to do it like they do. This is unproductive to me. Online it is easy to handle, my online mettle was strengthened by playing Eve Online so much, that almost nothing can make me feel all that bad online, but IRL it isn't all that hard to make me cry.

I think that near Washington, DC there is more than one group for MTFs, but still I have doubts on if meeting other transwomen would be good or bad for my morale. I have some very supportive friends, of course they have no real understanding of what I go through they don't need to understand they know what I want and they know my "lady pills" as they call them make me even more emotional than before. So my worry is, not that I wouldn't get anything from a support group, but more I am worried about people not being nice, or judging me; perhaps IRL it is different but online I see so many people who are "->-bleeped-<-r than thou" and who are older and seem to have some abject hatred of younger people who are closer to passing (am 28 that is kinda young I guess), these sorts of social dynamics worry me, I don't think I could really deal with such attitudes face to face. Though to be fair SuzifromMD and ThePhoenix both seem really nice and live closeish to me IIRC, so they don't seem so scary.

I know my experience are certainly not the same as everyone else's, but I am only a 20 year old trans woman, and I once talked to some trans woman in their 40's and 50's at a meetup about 40 minutes from where I live. The one I was mentioning at my college in an earlier is not where I met these trans women, that group is essentially entirely trans men, except for me. Anyways, my point is that in both of these trans support groups, be them older trans women and meeting with a young trans woman like me, or a bunch of trans men meeting with a trans woman, the people were all extremely compassionate, understanding, helpful, and even fun. Of course, there could be those trans woman that are older and judging in your area, who knows? You just have to weigh the potential costs against the potential benefits.

I'm 50 and I pass esier than most other transwomen younger than me I know. I think older transwomen judging you is a misnomer. In my experience transgender individuals both young and old have been nothing but supportive and have welcomed me with open arms. A great example is the beutiful people here on Susans. Bottom line is you won't know unless you go out and try.