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I do online dating, but I am completely out. Granted I'm still pre-op, but I still prefer to be out. I'm sorry that I cannot provide you with any suggestions. I just wish you the best of luck.

Just my opinion ,but I've never considered on line dating as a very safe way to go. I know others swear by it ,but it's just not my avocado.

I don't do online dating as well. I mean, if you hide things how many are they hiding? You could be talking to a serial killer for all you know. Please be safe and suspicious of everyone on the net. For me dating IRL is exciting because I am out and do not spend any time worrying about others finding out about me, they already know. This lets me relax and enjoy the experience.

Quote from: Jessica Merriman on March 02, 2014, 07:42:49 PM
Please be safe and suspicious of everyone on the net.

Trust me, I am very wary of some people.
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Lying about your location won't do you much good...if you are post op, and don't have to tell anyone, then I suppose it's your choice to say this.  But you shouldn't withhold a profile picture (without which nobody will ever ask about you) on account of this.  One useful stratigy I've come across is to use a term that only people who are already trans* literate would recognize-assigned male at birth is an example, or the arconym HRT. 

Quote from: androgynouspainter26 on March 02, 2014, 08:20:17 PM
  One useful stratigy I've come across is to use a term that only people who are already trans* literate would recognize-assigned male at birth is an example, or the arconym HRT.

That is an excellent idea! I did see a profile once where the woman said that she couldn't have kids because a birth defect, and she has to take hrt. We became friends, and she said that she never had anyone that wasn't familiar with trans lingo call her on it.

My experiences with online dating always seem to just randomly end or the person is a imposter. Because of this I stopped rushing when someone interesting comes by and I almost never get together with anyone I contact first. I dont know why but when I contact someone nothing ever happens and its only people that contact me that seem to stay in contact.

For my online pages I'm pretty upfront that I'm mtf transsexual and I think people just read that then leave without readying anything. Which is fine with me because it weeds out the posers and jokers.

If your trying to figure out if someone is real then simply ask them to send a picture of themselves with a note or something in the photo. If they refuse or get moody about then you know they have something to hide. My experience has tought me that the fakes gather many pictures from previous victims and try to steal from you as well. So expect tons of photos of daily life and the really good fakes even have the really personal photos.

Hope this helps out.

yeah I tried online dating. All I found where ->-bleeped-<-s, sex starved maniacs and such. I did meet one guy but he would treat our encounters as if he was smuggling people. So yeah I had to end that.

I don't really understand, what the problem is? I mean your post op! You don't need to tell everyone you're dating what your chromosomes are!
There are a lot of women with XY chromosomes (AIS Women or Women with Sywer syndrom). Most of them don't even know. After my surgery i will move to another City and live hopefully stealth as a ordinary infertile women. If you're passable then you don't have to worry about that. Just life your live!

I came to similar conclusions that the best way is to put a profile out there that clearly says I am TG. The difference is I am pre-op and I only like women. Of course at the moment for me it has only been a plan, I might lament the lack of a partner, but I am still technically married and while I am single and separated, I just don't feel I am quite ready to put myself out there again just yet.

As far as distance goes though, If you let people see your profile in your region and it clearly says you are out, that would out you to the larger community, but if you live in a densely populated area then I am not so sure just how much something like that would spread. If however you live in a small town for example, if one person sees it and knows then everyone will. I understand wanting a partner to know your history but not wanting the cashier at the supermarket to know.

I would caution against advertising much outside of your region, my experience with long distance relationships is that many people don't consider them "real" and have them with more than one person while telling you that you are the only one...but, I might just be jaded.

No matter what you did be safe.

Right now I'm too busy to go to bars, etc. so I only date online. I have an OkCupid profile and I get messaged on a regular basis through it. I don't disclose. I mean, I don't really consider it a stranger's business until I plan to be in a relationship with them. If it's a potential date or even casually dating someone, then it's not really any of their business.

That said, I rarely chat or message people for long periods of time unless I'm bored. So usually I just message a couple of times and if they seem nice I meet them. I met the guy I'm currently dating online and a number of people I've gone out on dates with have become friends. And of course, I get the rando and yucky messages, but I just ignore them.

I just bring it up in the initial talking/flirting. If they bail, so what? I have like five or six more dates that week to worry about so they can go stuff it.

I have an on-line dating account, but I don't disclose my status on my profile. I very carefully disclose it in early conversation. For guys I like, those early conversations are pretty playful. At the first turn toward a serious conversation, I reveal that I'm a transwoman, including that I pass and that I am fully transitioned (I explain what both mean). Along with these, I add that I'm a heterosexual woman who only dates heterosexual men. I also tell them the reason I don't disclose my "specialness" upfront is that I'm trying to avoid men who fetishize transsexuals. Thus far, I've been really fortunate. So many men just seem not to care that I have a different history. (I'm still pre-op). I'm not suggesting that my method is the reason it's worked well. I honestly don't know. But I am trying to alleviate men's fear that they might be strange if they decide to keep conversing with me. (Oh, and for safety reasons, I exchange messages for several days before I agree to meet one in a public place.)

Good luck.

So, I have an online profile that states I am trans, and I put it in two places in the body of the profile. I just went on a date where the woman had not fully read the profile, and did not know I was trans until I made a joke about it an hour into the date. Good news is she didn't care. The point is, not everyone reads the whole profile.