So yeah I was recently accused of self medicating by a friend and they are worried it's becoming an alcohol problem. I'm just wondering 1, when did two beers after work, or up to 4 on days I don't work become self medicating or a problem and 2, why is it when you have any kind of a mental disorder, what is perfectly fine for everyone else to do, suddenly becomes self medicating?
I can totally understand if I was drinking 4 or more beers daily, or drinking like I do while watching NASCAR daily, but freaking out over roughly a 12 pack a week??
Am I the only one who sees this as a bit off, or did I set up my lounge chair in the waters of the Nile again?

Thanks for your opinions
Kari

I think your friend is over-reacting a bit, if it were a 12 pack a day then I could understand a concern

The medical advice is one standard drink a day for females. It doesn't sound as if you are doing much more than that.

Can you go without it?

If the answer is yes, then there's no serious problems..

If the answer is no, it's time to think about why...

if you are drinking in moderation with 1 beer for 2 weeks or 2 in 6 days then that's not really self medicating if it was 3 or 4 or more a day then yes there would seem a problem but having 1 or 2 a day depending on weight is actually not a bad thing. if you always need a beer then there might be some kind of dependence there or addiction but if u don't need it all the time then you have nothing to worry about and truth be told that in moderate drinking that there are health benefits too, so if you like having a beer or 2 everyday which is moderate and its not self medicating, usually and take it from me cause I had this problem in the past but most who self medicate usually get drunk so coming from your post ur not drinking to get drunk so you have nothing to worry about, I would just let your friend know that you just enjoy having a beer or 2. also to add that 4 on occasion is fine, since you're not drinking 4 everyday so on occasion its fine and you said its a 12 pack a week which is actually pretty good, i used to work in florida and someone i knew whould buy a 12 pack every week so in all honesty a 12 pack a week isn't bad, actually that mostly the reason why they sell 6 packs and 12 packs since some like to either have 1 which in 6 days would be a week or 2 which equals out the same. just putting out my opinion on it.

Quote from: kelly_aus on April 07, 2014, 01:04:53 AM
Can you go without it?

If the answer is yes, then there's no serious problems..

If the answer is no, it's time to think about why...

I really don't drink much these days anymore. An occasional dirty martini with dinner or a glass of wine or perhaps a glass of scotch now and then. But that said, there was a time in my life when I could knock back a 12 pak and a 1/2 pint of Goldschläger in an evening. Like Kelly said. If you can't walk away from it then it's a problem.  2 - 4 beers doesn't seem like an issue to me, but for some people they think that if you drink at all your an alcoholic, which is more their problem than your.

PS: Watch out for those beers girl, they can put the weight on fast...

Quote from: kariann330 on April 07, 2014, 12:18:29 AM
So yeah I was recently accused of self medicating by a friend and they are worried it's becoming an alcohol problem. I'm just wondering 1, when did two beers after work, or up to 4 on days I don't work become self medicating or a problem and 2, why is it when you have any kind of a mental disorder, what is perfectly fine for everyone else to do, suddenly becomes self medicating?

As others have mentioned, it's a problem if you have to have those two beers after work.  And it's a fine line between wanting to decompress with a couple of brews, or having to decompress with a couple of brews.

That said, it would only be a problem either way if the alcohol is starting to affect your life negatively (e.g. drinking and driving, feeling sick, missing work, affecting relationships, etc.)  Are there any other indicators that might suggest the booze is starting to look like an issue?  I'm not sure it's the quantity that really matters (and a couple of beers sounds perfectly reasonable to me); rather it's the effects of those drinks that determines whether or not you should stop.

Does the friend drink?  If not, then those couple of beers are going to look like a crazy addiction to him or her.

It might be worth digging around and asking the friend for more information about this.  If it's something the friend brought up with the best of intentions, then figure out why.  There might be something you're just not seeing.

But at first glance, a couple of beers - assuming they're 12oz bottles of regular beer and not 40oz bottles of Steel Reserve - you're probably ok.

I honestly don't believe its a bad thing to come home from work and have 1 or 2 to unwind, I myself drink 1 a day and im actually pretty good, an alcoholic to me is someone who drinks everyday but not in moderation they have to drink to get drunk. if you are craving for alcohol then there might be problem since that usually means addiction but if you can limit it to 1 or 2 a day and be willing to not go too far with it then I don't see why someone cant drink a beer everyday and be fine. everyone has there opinions but that's just what they are, if you feel happy about drinking 1 everyday then why should someone stop you. anyway I don't see it as a problem. i don't know about 4 on days u don't work since it does go by weight, i don't weight much very skinny so i can usually only do 1 beer a day but i don't see much of an issue only issue i have with it since that a 12 pack can be kind of pricey depending on the kind you get but all in all, its all on based on how you see it, since its only ur friend that has the issue then i wouldn't worry, now if it was family saying something then maybe but also another reason why i don't see a problem is because your not having no problems with anything else, most alcoholics usually have personal problems, employment issues, and usually problems with the law so i don't think you have anything to worry about.

 I stopped drinking about 30 years ago so I'm not a good source of information. I think it's nice your friends are concerned.

Hi Kari,
It isn't how much you drink, it's why.  If you drink because you like to and it makes you feel relaxed, then no sweat.  If you drink because if you don't, you feel lonely, angry, different, and afraid - then you might want to talk to someone.

I am an alcoholic, and for me to drink any alcohol at all is to put at risk everything that I love and everything I hope for.  Drugs and alcohol were the magic elixirs that kept me going when all I wanted to do was die but was too chicken to do it.  I've been clean and sober for twenty-five years, and that whole process of self discovery and renewal changed how I relate to the world far better than chemistry ever could.

I can explicitly state that I could not have faced everything that transition entails while drinking.

So short answer - oh yeah there isn't one.   It is all up to you and how your feel about your life and how you choose to live it.  If alcohol is a demon for you there is help to be had for the asking.  Me or any other junkie in recovery is there for you.  If it isn't, relax.
Blessings,
Julie

Oh no!   Only two?  I used to put away at least 12 a night, and admittedly I was self medicating.

But since accepting my gender issue many years ago I can have two or three glasses of wine in a night, then go for a month without wanting anything.  So does it mean that if I have two or three glasses each night for a week I'd be self medicating again?  NO DAMN IT.  I'M ENJOYING A FINE GLASS OF WINE, JUST LIKE YOU ENJOY A GOOD COLD BEER.

And even with a glass of wine the NASCAR Sprint Cup race is still interesting .

Quote from: JulieBlair on April 07, 2014, 02:28:24 PM
Hi Kari,
It isn't how much you drink, it's why.  If you drink because you like to and it makes you feel relaxed, then no sweat.  If you drink because if you don't, you feel lonely, angry, different, and afraid - then you might want to talk to someone.

I am an alcoholic, and for me to drink any alcohol at all is to put at risk everything that I love and everything I hope for.  Drugs and alcohol were the magic elixirs that kept me going when all I wanted to do was die but was too chicken to do it.  I've been clean and sober for twenty-five years, and that whole process of self discovery and renewal changed how I relate to the world far better than chemistry ever could.

I can explicitly state that I could not have faced everything that transition entails while drinking.

So short answer - oh yeah there isn't one.   It is all up to you and how your feel about your life and how you choose to live it.  If alcohol is a demon for you there is help to be had for the asking.  Me or any other junkie in recovery is there for you.  If it isn't, relax.
Blessings,
Julie

Very well put Julie... I never had a problem with alcohol, but meth was my demon twenty plus years ago so I can relate quite well to what you are saying. That crap totally destroyed my life in my 30's. Cost me a marriage , job, the whole nine yards... It seems like a lifetime ago but it was a lesson never forgotten and learned well. Thanks for sharing.

Veronica,
Nasty stuff meth - still have your teeth?
j

Quote from: JulieBlair on April 07, 2014, 03:46:02 PM
Veronica,
Nasty stuff meth - still have your teeth?
j

Yes it is... And as to the teeth, going in two weeks for permanent implants. LOL... And here I though the cost of transitions was costly... WOW! Could have had a brand new set of breast for what my teeth cost. It will be nice to be able to smile completely again though... Always hated doing that closed month smile thing... Yuck!

honestly never did meth and probably wouldn't try it since it is illegal but I have done weed (marijuana) before, it acts almost the same as alcohol except it doesn't make you as sick if your high, but stays longer in the body than alcohol. I think the only ones I would never try would be meth, heroin, cocaine, and ecstasy which are highly addictive and illegal.

Quote from: Lavinia on April 07, 2014, 05:20:45 PM
honestly never did meth and probably wouldn't try it since it is illegal but I have done weed (marijuana) before, it acts almost the same as alcohol except it doesn't make you as sick if your high, but stays longer in the body than alcohol. I think the only ones I would never try would be meth, heroin, cocaine, and ecstasy which are highly addictive and illegal.

I use to smoke marijuana but now days all it does is make me stupid and forget where I put stuff so I gave it up... Mainly enjoying life at the moment... I think as I got older I just lost the thrill for all that crap... Not to mention it's a waist of money... But I do enjoy a nice cocktail on rare occasions, usually when I go out for dinner or something like that.

Olá Lavinia, onde você mora?

Your English is amazing!

Grazie julieblair, Io parlo inglese molto bene, e so che stavi parlando in portoghese, ma io non capisco portoghese troppo bene perché io so solo inglese e italiano. io vivo in Providence Rhode Island, ma è venuto da Milano Italia e imparato l'inglese negli Stati Uniti quando avevo 6 anni ma sono fluente in italiano. 

Ho dimenticato la maggior parte del mio italiano. Che tristezza.

Mi ricordo solo un po 'anche    ma non è un problema

Okay friends, time to get back on topic