Well, I'm 11 days out from having FFS with Dr Z. Almost all the arrangements are completed and after I get back from the surgery, I'm full time ME! It's been a long process getting to this point: I started dealing with my dysphoria in Feburary/March of 2012, started counseling in June of 2012, HRT in Feb 2013 and now it's off for FFS.
I work in a research laboratory running studies and reviewing the Hazard/Risk/Toxicological assessments of chemistries and products for a very large multinational corporation. As such, every year, I work with 400+ people several times a year plus a whole lot more periodically. It's a huge list of several thousand people that have to know I am Jennifer. While most will simply get an email from HR and my VP, I selected 68 people to talk with individually. I typically took two or three to lunch and we just talked. During the conversation, I would come out to them, tell them that I was having surgery May 1st and when I returned on June 16, I would be Jennifer. I then answered questions. Thus far at work, I have not had one negative response. The text from the email below is typical...
"I want to tell you that I am 100% fully supportive of what you're going through. I feel very honored that I was included in one of your in-depth conversations, even if you have given it more times than you can remember now. Over the past year and a half, I've come to realize that you are a great person, and I hope that won't change. I will still look to you for guidance and knowledge as I have in the past.
One of my best friends and roommate for 3 years after college helped me to be more cognizant and aware of differences. He was openly gay when I met him, but I realized it had no effect on our relationship. I trusted him and liked being around him because he was a great friend and a great person. He really got me to understand that I needed to judge a person on their being rather than their orientation/appearance. I truly hope that everyone around you will continue to give you support and love as you go through your transformation.
Thanks again and best of luck!"
Three of my favorites were "I don't care if you are checkered; we need you doing what you do." (Sr Manufacturing Manager), "That took a lot of strength, thank you. Lunch in June is on me." (Director of Toxicology) and "Welcome, give me a hug." (my Vice President).
The home life is OK. I have a son in law who is struggling but accepting. My step daughters and grandchildren think it's cool. I am closer to my wife and best friend than ever. Two sisters are supportive. There is one problem. My oldest sister whom I am closest with is a lesbian and she thinks I have totally lost it. We are talking militant hatred. We spoke this morning and we at least spoke. I'll keep working on it.
Overall, it's been unbelievably good. The lunch and talking thing worked so well. It wasn't easy and it was expensive, but it worked. Everyone had questions and often, they came up with unique questions. Throughout all of this, the weeks I have been doing lunches, no one talked to anyone else. That is remarkable.
Thank you everyone on Susan's for the support and advice. I have said this before but will say it again: I would not be here; I would not be alive, if it wasn't for this wonderful place and the wonderful people.
I just wanted to share the good because so often, we hear only the bad.
Hugs to all!!!!!
Jen
