Quote from: Kara Jayde on April 21, 2014, 11:36:12 PM
Why do you think that the older transitions are more likely to be lesbian Carrie? I find that interesting.

I thought I read a study at some point that early-transitioners (those who have SRS before the age of 30) are statistically more likely to be exclusively attracted to men, while it tended to be a more mixed bag of orientations amongst later-transitioners?

75% straight (into men) i would say 100 but im currently married to a woman and i love her so... yeah. Im 22 but i see no real reasoning to why older trans would be more likely to be lesbian and vice versa.

Through almost 40 years I never had more than a flutter for a man. The last 4 years were incredibly confusing until my "Holly sh*t, I'm a girl!" moment. Sex became less than satisfying, then frustrating to something I needed and hated at the same time. After my marriage ended I tried being with other girls to the same result. Oh, it was fun taking a girl over the top again and again. Then it was my turn, ugh! Even that, "Wow! You can really keep going!" wasn't satisfying. It always ended with them wondering if it was them, did they do something wrong. It wasn't fair to them and left me feeling like a horrible human being. Everything was fully functional, I was just on the wrong end of the pointy stick.
During the same four years I became more and more attracted to men. Interactions with men stopped being a juvenile d*ck measuring contest. (Hard to do when you are wondering if they do, in fact, have a nice one.) I hated that part of my anatomy. Hated being a man and forced to go through the chest thumping, crotch scratching ego trip called male interaction. They were more manly than me. I knew it and could have saved them a lot of posturing.
At this point I was sure I was gay. What other options could explain the kind of person I was? It only took one attempt at being with a guy to show me how wrong I was. The parts were wrong, a guy wanting me as a guy was wrong. After years of frustration and finally acceptance that I wanted a guy touching me and inside of me I felt crushed. I wanted it, but not like that. I wanted to scream at him to stop treating me like a man!

All of that to say this-

I am a girl.
I am only sexually attracted to guys.
I am straight. 

I admire a woman's body, but I'm not sexually attracted to women, cis or trans. I've been with my BF for 19 months now and am deeply in love. And lust, lol! We're just a heterosexual couple, period. No woman could ever make me feel the way he does. I'm not into B & D or sadomasochism, but I like being made love to and frankly, there is nothing like a guy's chest, abs, and especially his private parts to make me weak at the knees. I love a man who knows how to make love to a woman and let me be submissive. Mine does. I fully intend to have SRS, but I'll always love anal sex as well. The last woman I was with was over twenty years ago, and I don't miss it in the least. When I was with women I felt like a lesbian and jealous that she had a body I'll have to have surgery to get. For the girls who wonder if orgasm will happen after SRS, I'm positive that the mind, the brain, is the most wonderful and effective sex organ any of us can have. I hope that wasn't TMI!!!

In retrospect, I was attracted to boys like any other straight girl, and now feel I would never have been with women if it wasn't supposed to be what made a male 'normal', and can still remember the first time I was so turned on I could hardly stand was watching a gorgeous eighth grade guy kissing a seventh grade girl and wishing so badly I was her. I'll never forget that feeling of having to catch my breath. I knew then, without a doubt, that I liked boys, but in 1967, and thirteen years old, I was already a mess because I knew I was a girl inside.

Quote from: Miranda Catherine on April 22, 2014, 01:54:13 AM
In retrospect, I was attracted to boys like any other straight girl, and now feel I would never have been with women if it wasn't supposed to be what made a male 'normal', and can still remember the first time I was so turned on I could hardly stand was watching a gorgeous eighth grade guy kissing a seventh grade girl and wishing so badly I was her. I'll never forget that feeling of having to catch my breath. I knew then, without a doubt, that I liked boys, but in 1967, and thirteen years old, I was already a mess because I knew I was a girl inside.

You know thats the same with me. I told my cousin when we were 6 that i planned to be a bride and marry a boy, but by the time we were teenagers my famuy and religion had beat the idea that men were meant to be with women. In fact i never had sex until i was almost 19 and i was blacked out drunk, i found out the next morning when i woke up next to a girl that been trying to get my attention for several weeks.

Well I'm an oldie (but a goodie ), heterosexual female in a relationship with a straight man.

Yeppers I'm straight and only been with guys. Unless you count at 10 yrs old, but lol we didn't even know what dating was. We just went to these weekly parties, and to be cool you had to be with someone, but we thought kissing was gross, and were ultimately just friends. After that a lot of girls wanted to date me or do stuff with me and it just was upsetting because I only thought of them as my friends. I lost my virginity to a boy way too young.

I think most people here like women or used to tho. I always feel kind of left out.

One thing that i could never make sense of is why some people identified as "not a gay guy" before transition and dated girls until transitioning. I mean, you like who you like right? Orientation isn't even a choice whether you identify or not.

Actually you might of have to be careful if you befriend trans women, just saying, a lot of times they will claim to be straight but really they just want to get close to you and eventually reveal that they like or only like women. I couldn't believe that but that happened to me and a friend from here. That crazy bitch pretended to be completely straight and started getting really creepy, esp with my friend.

I suppose when I was growing I liked guys, and had partners, but I didn't feel Gay. Now I'm a woman I accept my feelings for men very easily. It's just a different inner feeling now.

Quote from: Cindy on April 22, 2014, 03:14:17 AM
I suppose when I was growing I liked guys, and had partners, but I didn't feel Gay. Now I'm a woman I accept my feelings for men very easily. It's just a different inner feeling now.

But, if you had a wife is it fair to her to call yourself totally straight? Im not implying anything and its ok to like both though.

Quote from: sad panda on April 22, 2014, 03:21:22 AM
But, if you had a wife is it fair to her to call yourself totally straight? Im not implying anything and its ok to like both though.

Well I have a wife, we fell in love and still love each other, but sexual relations was never something we had as any priority, and we haven't for 25 years or so, we just needed the companionship of being together. I'm not denying I may be Bi, not a problem, but since being a woman FT I have had no attraction to other women in any sexual sense.

Of course I need to add, that when I was a teen homosexuality was illegal where I was. You were sent to gaol, a male gaol

Quote from: Cindy on April 22, 2014, 03:25:00 AM
Well I have a wife, we fell in love and still love each other, but sexual relations was never something we had as any priority, and we haven't for 25 years or so, we just needed the companionship of being together. I'm not denying I may be Bi, not a problem, but since being a woman FT I have had no attraction to other women in any sexual sense.

ok fair enough. I can't pretend to understand but it doesn't matter for me to, that's great that you discovered what you like!

Societal acceptance of gender and sexual orientation has changed so much, that unless you were living in those times it is incomprehensible about how difficult it was to express yourself. A bit like being homosexual or TG in Uganda nowadays.

Oh yah for sure, like there was the hanky code lol.

I wonder if I'll become straight if I ever get on HRT or even go any further with my transition. I have been only with one another boy for a year when I was 15 years old. Didn't like it much...

Sonia

Quote from: sad panda on April 22, 2014, 03:07:02 AM
One thing that i could never make sense of is why some people identified as "not a gay guy" before transition and dated girls until transitioning. I mean, you like who you like right? Orientation isn't even a choice whether you identify or not.

Erm, how about because I'm not a gay guy?


Whilst I was in denial about my gender identity, I never found men attractive. Not even a little bit. Now that I am freeing the floodgates of denial and accepting my gender identity, a side effect of it seems to be that I might actually be attracted to men as well. I can't really explain it, but one theory I have is that I confused longing to be a woman with sexual desire, and then sexually lived vicariously through the women's experience. It's not like I knew I liked guys before hand, and I'm starting to accept it - I honestly didn't find men attractive before at all. Make of that what you will.

Quote from: BeingSonia on April 22, 2014, 04:01:03 AM
I wonder if I'll become straight if I ever get on HRT or even go any further with my transition. I have been only with one another boy for a year when I was 15 years old. Didn't like it much...

Sonia

You may, you may not. Sexuality and gender are different and there are no rules. Nor should there be. Accept yourself for being you. Each of us are wonderful.

hrt made me a lesbian by killing my libido and by making me more emotional....


lol...true story though

I've always been interested in the sexuality shift people experience. For me, my sexuality is pretty much locked.  I remember trying to change it when I was younger, but nothing could make me feel differently. I was who I was.  And even though I didn't see myself as a gay guy, part of me accepted that was how I was seen and even came out as such in the past.  When I see other people having the ability to alter their own sexuality, it confuses me.  But I know it happens as many experience that.  It just is something I can't relate with.  I really don't think it's a hormonal thing more than people opening up to things they kept locked down.

In the end, all that matters is that you follow your heart.  Gay, Straight, bi, lez, it really doesn't matter.  Everyone deserves love and happiness.  I say this as someone who used to struggle with accepting their sexuality. 

These threads always bum me out because it makes me think about romance and then in turn I remember how lonely I am and how much I desire a boyfriend that I'll probably never find.  I would date now if I weren't afraid of societal judgement and not being attractive enough for a partner.   In any event, it's all confusing when you are in andro mode about how to even go forward with dating.   Eh....

Quote from: learningtolive on April 22, 2014, 04:47:18 AM
I've always been interested in the sexuality shift people experience. For me, my sexuality is pretty much locked.  I remember trying to change it when I was younger, but nothing could make me feel differently. I was who I was.  And even though I didn't see myself as a gay guy, part of me accepted that was how I was seen and even came out as such in the past.  When I see other people having the ability to alter their own sexuality, it confuses me.  But I know it happens as many experience that.  It just is something I can't relate with.  I really don't think it's a hormonal thing more than people opening up to things they kept locked down.

In the end, all that matters is that you follow your heart.  Gay, Straight, bi, lez, it really doesn't matter.  Everyone deserves love and happiness.  I say this as someone who used to struggle with accepting their sexuality. 

TThese threads always bum me out because it makes me think about romance and then in turn I remember how lonely I am and how much I desire a boyfriend that I'll probably never find. I would date now if I weren't afraid of societal judgement and not being attractive enough for a partner.   In any event, it's all confusing when you are in andro mode about how to even go forward with dating.   Eh....

From an old woman. You find people who want you for who you are and accept you when you are not looking for them.

People are not attracted to the desperate, but to the confident.

You will find your lover one day and he/she will surprise you.

Mainly because lovers are surprising