So I'm going into town with my sister tomorrow, and were going to a lazor/electrolosys salon, to make arangement to romove my biggest barrier (face fur). Since my skin is soft I cut very easily when shaving, and shaving with less then three day stubble makes this so much more disasterous to my face, this means I'm lucky to go out twice a week, and today is the day before a shave day.
I woke up and found myself doing the same thing I have been doing for the last two days, eating and sitting in my room refreshing susans. I began to feel down, it was such a nice day and I started thinking of all the things I'd rather be doing instead. I looked out my window and sighed. I was in a numb mood, tears were welling up but I cought myself. I went to get a smoke and found my packed empty (heart sank). My local store is less then 40 feet from my front door, I put my coat on and went to brush my hair (big mistake). I take one look at my face and sat on my sofa. I sat there staring into space, wishing hoping my dad would get back.
I don't know how long I had been sat like that but, knock knock knock went the front door. I looked through the peep hole (as you do) and noticed its was my dads freinds son, I opened the door and found out he wanted to know if he could borrow the phone. I'd been saved. It will cost you I said, I'm all smiles now, he looks at me and sees me grinning like a cheshier cat. Your going to the shop for me.
Anyway he goes to shop, uses the phone and I stand In my kitchen having my smoke. My dad gets back at this point, so he and my dad have a man chat. The nice (you should be outside in it) weather was mentioned and I juimp in with a "That's not so easey for some of us." The guy looks at me for a few seconds and then all of a sudden he realise why I was so happy to see him (He knows I'm trans of course). He says you can sit in your garden. My garden Is "WAS" a complete tip since My dysphoria and my dad age prevented upkeep of it.
He looks out our back window and marches off home to come back later with a mower and all sorts of other tools. So I had a freind and company In the garden today as we set about sorting it. Every so often my elderly dad popped out to Inspect the progress. After the majoraty of the tidying up was done, my dads freinds son came to the conclusion, that it was fire time. HE made the rounds of the (wish I could spell neighbours) other people living close to my house, and set about building it.
During the fire the person living to the right came out for a chat since she saw my dad, her and my dad began to talk about children, meaning my dad is all he this and he that bla bla bla. I'm cringing to myself and resigned to the situation that as soon as my gender is changed I'm going to get prissy about it, but antill then Ill let him be.
The handy guy though that's a different story, I've met him a few times now and have had a few hours long conversations with him, I'm vicky, she, her, woman and even "missy moo" to him, (even with a face full of fur).
This god send of a guy also stops to chat, so I make myself usefull and make coffees. It was the least I could do In thanks for all the labour this guy was doing. I bring out the drinks pass the guys theirs and go with mine to a corner to sit and have a smoke. I snip in the chat here and their with a wit full coment. After my smoke I became a bit more chatty, I mean the lady can see I'm and girls clothes and my dad Is still all with the he's, so I don't bother to hide my voice, what was the point. But then It came, I'm talking male, being reffered to as a male, and have a face full of fur, and the lady says to my dad (pointing at me) "so does she go to the same church as you then?" Of course my dad was WHO? But she gestures a bit more and says it again, so my dad glances over and from that point continues the conversatiion reffering to me as she
Today was the best day I have had with face fur since I can remember. Of course a lot more work was done, and ME and this guy did a lot more talking, joking. There is somthing that I find a bit strage though. He was a bit sexist steriotype but I think it was more to enforce he's treating me as female kinda. Its just that he kept saying but your "The" woman and that's "The" womans job. I just found it a bit strage that it wasn't "A" woman or "A" womans job that he was saying. Maybe I'm just over thinking it.
EDIT- made an attempt to apply better grammer.
