Misery loves company. I'd rather avoid it. The transsexuals that aren't jealous or fixate on being miserable are usually the more fun ones to be around anyways. Not just by me, but by people outside of the trans community.

Lately I'm sensing a negative vibe from a CIS Asian acquaintance (my landlords daughter) who comes around from time to time.

I actually had a small crush on her when we met a few years ago. But I was in guy mode. Now I'm blossoming as a gal myself and I've unabashedly become prettier than even she is. My slender hands and nails are longer, they look feminine and was commented on 5 weeks ago, "you're a girl now..." I flipped my hair and 'jokingly' implied, "I am a girl..."

A month onwards I'm improving, my hair is longer than hers and my face is undoubtedly feminizing. Now I'm getting these somewhat snotty looks of disdain from her. She's also wearing makeup and studying me when she's around. Am I now competing with her? I'm not even wearing makeup - still presenting androgynously.

I'm not sure what to think of it.

Quote from: Evelyn K on May 23, 2014, 02:44:32 PM


I guess it's similar

This is the first thing I thought of when I read this thread!

LOL

Quote from: Evelyn K on May 27, 2014, 05:50:04 PM
Lately I'm sensing a negative vibe from a CIS Asian acquaintance (my landlords daughter) who comes around from time to time.

I actually had a small crush on her when we met a few years ago. But I was in guy mode. Now I'm blossoming as a gal myself and I've unabashedly become prettier than even she is. My slender hands and nails are longer, they look feminine and was commented on 5 weeks ago, "you're a girl now..." I flipped my hair and 'jokingly' implied, "I am a girl..."

A month onwards I'm improving, my hair is longer than hers and my face is undoubtedly feminizing. Now I'm getting these somewhat snotty looks of disdain from her. She's also wearing makeup and studying me when she's around. Am I now competing with her? I'm not even wearing makeup - still presenting androgynously.

I'm not sure what to think of it.

I doubt your competeing with her? this you would know :p. But maybe she is trying to compete with you? Maybe she is jelouse? or envious? maybe she feels she needs to put extra effort in to look more atractive? maybe she HAS to do this and feels like she shouldnt have to? maybe she feels anoyed at this?

But you know what? thats an awefull lot of maybe. If your worried you might loose your freind, have you pointed out that youve noticed this? and told her she doesnt need make up because pretty girls dont need make up?

If she is feeling intimidated by your femininity, maybe helping her feel better with hers might ease some tention.

Quote from: ButterflyVickster on May 27, 2014, 06:30:58 PM
I doubt your competeing with her? this you would know :p. But maybe she is trying to compete with you? Maybe she is jelouse? or envious? maybe she feels she needs to put extra effort in to look more atractive? maybe she HAS to do this and feels like she shouldnt have to? maybe she feels anoyed at this?

But you know what? thats an awefull lot of maybe. If your worried you might loose your freind, have you pointed out that youve noticed this? and told her she doesnt need make up because pretty girls dont need make up?

If she is feeling intimidated by your femininity, maybe helping her feel better with hers might ease some tention.

A little reverse psychology and a few flattering comments can mend a lot of holes in the fabric of friendship, excellent idea Vickster!

Quote from: ButterflyVickster on May 27, 2014, 06:30:58 PM
I doubt your competeing with her? this you would know :p. But maybe she is trying to compete with you? Maybe she is jelouse? or envious? maybe she feels she needs to put extra effort in to look more atractive? maybe she HAS to do this and feels like she shouldnt have to? maybe she feels anoyed at this?

But you know what? thats an awefull lot of maybe. If your worried you might loose your freind, have you pointed out that youve noticed this? and told her she doesnt need make up because pretty girls dont need make up?

If she is feeling intimidated by your femininity, maybe helping her feel better with hers might ease some tention.

We're not really friends, she's actually now married,

But I've sensed some bewilderment ever since I jokingly proclaimed, "I-am a girl " to her and her mother and sister, and her seeing these real facial changes. These aren't highly schooled people, being boutique shop keepers from a relatively mundane city in China just 7 years ago. Without some rudimentary medical understanding, exposure to trans people or pertinent popular media about our existence, I would imagine they are not capable of making even a layman's assumption about what could be happening here, other than, he must really *be* a girl afterall! (whew I know run-on sentence) So to them I must be an absolute mindf* to have hidden this for all these years.

As for "competing" I don't know. I certainly am not. But to the Asian gal, I probably effaced my former self in a surprising way. And she may feel the need compete with me as CIS girls normally do.

I guess I may enjoy microaggressions. When I wear plainly, few people watch me. With 4-inch heels, I can attract nearly all of people in the street, especially women. Women like to comment, and I can hear what they are saying about me. It can be a kind of first-hand evaluation of my appearance and fashion.

I have heard jokes on my gender identity at least once every day during the last several years. I do not complain so much. At least, they are interested in me.

Both men ad women become more friendly to me. For example, a few days ago, one woman, who attended a group meeting together with me, came and asked me to smoke cigarette together in the yard. As it is still taboo for women to smoke in my country, especially in this remote and conservative island, she wanted a kind of protection or excuse from me (not alone, but two women smoke!). She would never ask it if I look like a man. She even touched my arms without any hesitation. Also, she commented on my skirt, advising to wear differently, and recommended her secret anti-aging cream. Other women asked about the height of my heels, or gladly took photos for me, too. They commented I look sexy, but I do not think they are jealous of me.

barbie~~