I soooooo envy you girls that can achieve a female voice. For me due to throat damage from accident I'm afraid VFS is my only hope. If that don't work, I'm learning sign and becoming mute. I hate my voice so much i can't put it into words.

Ally

Dang... I'm sorry about that.  I hope the VFS works for you then. 

I'm worried about something similar, but not quite as bad.  Before I joined the USMC, I sang Tenor I (highest male voice in standard chorus, sometimes singing into the mid Soprano range) in a semi-professional choir.  I haven't been able to sing the same since Boot Camp.  When I can sing, it is not good and in the full Baritone range.  I'm just hoping to train my voice up enough to be able to sing Alto, as well as pass as a feminine voice.  I miss being able to sing...

Oh, I know that hurt, Raven

I had a similar experience. When I was in elementary school, I sang in a choir and I was able to do very high voices, but at 10 or 11, my voice started to change and, now, years later, I can't do these high voices anymore. It really hurt when you realize that kind of things.

But unlike Allyda, I wouldnt like to become mute ! I will do all I can do to sound female, but loosing my voice or any other sense is my greatest fear x)

Quote from: Allyda on May 17, 2014, 08:54:19 PM
I soooooo envy you girls that can achieve a female voice. For me due to throat damage from accidenr I'm afraid VFS is my only hope. If that don't work, I'm learning sign and becoming mute. I hate my voice so much i can't put it into words.

Ally

What sort of voice damage you have?
I am asking, because I have a damage too, caused by too loud and too high singing during puberty, which leaded to lost ability to go in a falsetto and throat aching, whenever I try to go any note above middle C, and no voice at all, but only air above E/F... Although I still have got a proven passable female voice with no surgeries at all

Quote from: Aquarelle on May 19, 2014, 04:15:22 AM
What sort of voice damage you have?
I am asking, because I have a damage too, caused by too loud and too high singing during puberty, which leaded to lost ability to go in a falsetto and throat aching, whenever I try to go any note above middle C, and no voice at all, but only air above E/F... Although I still have got a proven passable female voice with no surgeries at all

I was in an aircraft accident in 1991 where my larinx was crushed -had to have tracheotomy on scene then emergency surgery on my throat to keep me from choking as things swole shut. So I have a lot of scar tissue near and in my voicebox that make my voice sound scratchy and I have no range. I can however still go falsetto but there is no in between. I'm afraid VFS is my only hope and even then I'm not so sure as VFS is far from foolproof.

Ally

Oh I hope you'll can reach your goals Ally

Allyda, did you have a lot of voice therapy yet? That gap between cheast and head voice (falsetto) can somtimes be minimized with some therapy. Other than that, I would suggest you look at two options for VFS and so consultations with both. Dr Kim seems to be really good, so I gues sit is worth a try to send him all the information you have. Do a thorough ENT examination with laryngoskopy and voice recordings before and see if you can possibly send it to Dr Kim for an evaluation. The opther option I would consider is Dr Thomas in Portland. He does a larynx reconstruction, so if you have a lot of scar tissue there, he might be able to actually reshape everything in a way that repairs some of that old damage as well. It is much mor invasive than Dr Kim, but Dr Kims metod IMO is made for a more or less healthy voice that is having minor issues like assymetry and pitch issues. Dr Thomas seems to be able to repair a lot more if there is previous damage. So I would get consultations from both and see who is more promising.

Quote from: Emi ("LonelyFrench") on May 20, 2014, 01:22:19 AM
Oh I hope you'll can reach your goals Ally

Thanks Emi I really appreciate it. I hope so too because my only other option is learning sign and becoming mute. I hate my voice so much even though out in public I pass with ease despite how terrible I sound. I'm hurt so bad over the phone though because it's the only time I get Sirred. I was speaking to mt code enforcement officer this morning and no matter how many times I said I'm a Ms, not a Sir, or, I'm a woman, not a man, he still insisted on Sirring me. I was nearly in tears by the end of the short conversation.

Quote from: anjaq on May 20, 2014, 03:55:34 AM
Allyda, did you have a lot of voice therapy yet? That gap between cheast and head voice (falsetto) can somtimes be minimized with some therapy. Other than that, I would suggest you look at two options for VFS and so consultations with both. Dr Kim seems to be really good, so I gues sit is worth a try to send him all the information you have. Do a thorough ENT examination with laryngoskopy and voice recordings before and see if you can possibly send it to Dr Kim for an evaluation. The opther option I would consider is Dr Thomas in Portland. He does a larynx reconstruction, so if you have a lot of scar tissue there, he might be able to actually reshape everything in a way that repairs some of that old damage as well. It is much mor invasive than Dr Kim, but Dr Kims metod IMO is made for a more or less healthy voice that is having minor issues like assymetry and pitch issues. Dr Thomas seems to be able to repair a lot more if there is previous damage. So I would get consultations from both and see who is more promising.

Yes, I've tried voice therapy quite a few time as I've been full time now for 5 years. I can get to the lower female range without going into falsetto but it's just too hard to hold. I'm supposed to have scheduling this week for an ENT consult at Shans University Hospital in Gainesville for a surgical consult but they haven't gotten back with me yet. So hopefully that will bear fruit, or at the very least give me some answers if they ever get me scheduled.

Ally

Keep telling us about any progress Ally

Quote from: Emi ("LonelyFrench") on May 21, 2014, 06:52:20 AM
Keep telling us about any progress Ally

I promise I will. Had a setback today though. It seems after first telling me this ENT doctor at Shans did do VFS, now I'm being told he doesn't. So I'm a little depressed. Becominh mute is sounding better and better. Anyhoo, So I contacted my Endo and he's going to find me a surgeon that does do VFS for sure. My Endo doesn't like seeing his trans patients getting the run-a-round. I'll let y'all know when I know when I'm scheduled and with who.

I really appreciate everyone's support and concern.

Ally

Quote from: Allyda on May 21, 2014, 06:00:43 PM
So I'm a little depressed. Becominh mute is sounding better and better.

Hey, don't worry, if your endo is a good one he will find you a good surgeon for sure. Don't be dipressed, keep hope

Quote from: Allyda on May 20, 2014, 12:47:20 PM
I can get to the lower female range without going into falsetto but it's just too hard to hold.

Hmm - yes I understadn. it has to be done inthe proper way or it is straining a lot.

On a different note - how do you train voice melody and inflection properly. I tried to just speak after recordings of women who talk or read, but usually it is too fast for me to repeat, if I repeat I am not sure I did it right and if I record it I am not sure what to watch out for. I think I am doing a lot of mistakes there still

Girls, the whole voice thing is a challenge to all of us, but it does get better with training, effort, and listening to yourself.

I started doing voice training only a month ago, with a singing teacher,  to improve my range.  And at the same time I have been working on pitch, tone and inflection by really listening to how women speak.  (Women's Hour - a great BBC Radio 4 program and available as a podcast!)

And today one of my girl friends sent me a text saying that there was a strange voice doing the greeting for my mobile phone voicemail.   It was my old male voice.  The one she no longer recognises

Patience and practise... and yes, I wish I was patient and had time to practise!!!

Hugs!
J

you got there in only a month? you must be a natural

I've always sang to myself as far back as when I was very little when I used to sing along to cartoon theme songs (they had some good ->-bleeped-<- back in the 80s, I tell you). But going forward a bit there was a time I my life when I got hooked on Sailor Moon and while singing along to the theme song my brother asked me why I was singing like a girl. I smiled, but was like "uh-oh" I got caught, but still continued to sing like that (I can't even remember now of what I really sounded like then, probably hyper cutesy or something similarly exaggerated). But I used singing to help my talking voice (it took many years, and I'm still working on it), but that did not help my singing voice ("Please...oh god, please shut up!" This coming from someone being tortured having to hear me sing; my mom, she's done long gotten used to it). I also do a lot of cat meows all the time (dog now too, ever since my Snickers came into my life), and cartoon voices (silly pointless stuff for my own amusement, not voice training or anything like that, just for fun).

I don't like my normal voice much (sometimes I'm self-conscience about it), I sound female enough, certainly not like how I used to sound. And while I can get my voice deep (again for my own entertainment when quoting cartoons, movies, games) it sounds artificial like a girl trying to sound like a guy. I don't fully remember exactly what I used to sound like unless I watch an old family tape with me in it (its been some years since I had seen and heard my old self), and its just weird because not only does it make me cringe hearing and seeing me then, I sound like a different person.

Sometimes, because I do have really bad allergies, I tend to sound nasally much of the time and also always mucus running down my throat (post-nasal drip?) sometimes I get clogged up and have to hack it up because it'll cause my voice to crackle and try to get stuck sounding horsey. Also if I've been talking too much my throat gets tired and I have to clear it a lot, drink something and lessen down on the talking for a bit while my throat recovers. My voice is very bland (at least to me), nothing pretty or sing-songy, but then I've never been one to show excitement through talking since much of my life I tried so much to avoid talking to anyone except myself (there were times in my life all too often that I wished I'm lose my voice altogether just so I'd have an excuse not to speak). But whatever. If no one gets confused seeing and hearing me in person, or over the phone, I'm good.

Is tone one of those things that only has a certain amount that it can change.  I guess what I mean is my voice is insanely deep, I look the complete opposite but I could easily impersonate the actor Michael Clark Duncan over the phone.  This is really my biggest fear in "passing" and also the thing I have worked on the least so far.

Does this mean more work or does it mean that even with all the work in the world I will land at a Michael Cera voice which is MUCH closer to female but not quite what I would want as an end result.

Quote from: Julia-Madrid on May 28, 2014, 05:01:51 PM

And today one of my girl friends sent me a text saying that there was a strange voice doing the greeting for my mobile phone voicemail.   It was my old male voice.  The one she no longer recognises

I had setup the voicemail on my wife's cell phone years ago. I had a friend in the car and I called my wife on speaker phone and her voicemail picked up and it was my old voice. I don't know who was shocked more, me or my friend. We first thought I had dialed the wrong number since I no longer sound anything like that anymore.

CandiFLA is fantastic!  I hadn't found her before. 

One strange thing that has been helping me is that I noticed that I talk to my three year-old with a softer sing-songey higher pitch voice.  It's just what comes out naturally with him.  That is if I'm not scolding him for filling the toilet with toys.    Anyway...I'm working to develop that voice without sounding like I'm talking down to someone.  I still have a bit more condescension than I'd like, but I'm closer than I was.

Quote from: Michaela Whimsy on May 28, 2014, 10:46:41 PM
Does this mean more work or does it mean that even with all the work in the world I will land at a Michael Cera voice which is MUCH closer to female but not quite what I would want as an end result.

Pitch-wise, that may be the best you can do since you're starting with such a low voice.  But the female voice is more than just pitch.  Women tend to be more sing-songey and their speech patterns are even a bit different.  Men are more monotone and emphasize words with strength rather than pitch.  If you can develop those with a Michael Cera-range pitch, you should be in pretty good shape.

Quote from: anjaq on May 28, 2014, 05:30:28 PM
you got there in only a month? you must be a natural

He he, Anjaq, I have a fairly gentle voice to start with, which helps.  What also helps are long weekends permanently in girl mode.   Work days in boy mode are a bit of a pain, but thankfully I have less than 2 months left of those!  Can't wait to get rid of the dual personality!!! 

Well, more disappointments. I've struck out in the Gainesville area and am now taking a break from the phone tag to hopefully enjoy myself this weekend, and get a fresh start next week with the Tampa area. Tampa also has a few LGBT support groups that can maybe help find an ENT specialist to analize my voice/voicebox to see what can be done. Hopefully I'll be able to find an ENT specialist in the Tampa/St. Pete. area. I would make some calls today but I have my gender change on my driver's license going on and some shopping and other things to do, so today is out. I am very excited about getting my gender changed to female on my license, however this does nothing to solve my voice issues. Hopefully, I'll have more luck with finding an ENT and getting my path to having my voice corrected back on track next week. I hope so, for I don't know how much more I can take getting Sirr'ed over the phone.

Ally