Quote from: Trudi on June 03, 2014, 07:03:25 AM
Hello ladies & gents,
For myself I have just turned 48.  I had to keep my dysphoria a secret from my family and friends merely to comply in what they expected from me, even through my marriages (the first I had two sons). Secretly I was miserable, with my most recent relationship I was feeling so guilty because I deeply care for my partner I told her my secret. Unfortunately she could not cope with being in an intimate relationship however she will stand beside me while I start transition. While this broke my heart I understood,  she is my best friend! 

Now I was in desperate need of somewhere to live, as chance would have it I found a very accepting family who has rented me room in their home and is very accepting of my transitioning. I can be who I was always meant to be!

I have a job which keeps me very busy so finding time to actually see a specialist so I can start on hormones is difficult.  But I am starting to network,  I am meeting tomorrow evening with other members of Seahorse Queensland in Brisbane to find out more about the group and find more about myself (hopefully get some great advice on makeup as well!) 

So hello world, my name is Trudi and I am here!

Hey Hi Trudi. So glad to hear you can finally be yourself, it's an amazing feeling isn't it? I hope your family do stick by you, even if they are unsure right now.

This journey is an amazing one, I'm sure you'll enjoy seeing the changes come in once you get going with it medically. Hopefully that will be soon.

Welcome Trudi!

I will be 44 at the end of this month. Wow.

I've posted this before. But for any of y'all over 40 I have a FB group. Send me a PM. I should let you know up front this is trans guys only. Nobody under 40. It is a closed group, not secret. Therefore your name is visible as a member, but this stuff doesn't show up on your wall (on your newsfeed, but that's separate). You can share a post off group. We have confidentiality guidelines similar to a support group. We moderate with a light touch but we do expect guys to be grown ups.

--Jay

Quote from: aleon515 on June 03, 2014, 02:57:59 PM
I've posted this before. But for any of y'all over 40 I have a FB group. Send me a PM. I should let you know up front this is trans guys only. Nobody under 40. It is a closed group, not secret. Therefore your name is visible as a member, but this stuff doesn't show up on your wall (on your newsfeed, but that's separate). You can share a post off group. We have confidentiality guidelines similar to a support group. We moderate with a light touch but we do expect guys to be grown ups.

--Jay

Ah I didn't realise this group wasn't private. I'm keeping stuff off my main profile page. And I turn 40 on Friday too   lol

Quote from: Mattfromengland on June 03, 2014, 04:15:51 PM
Ah I didn't realise this group wasn't private. I'm keeping stuff off my main profile page. And I turn 40 on Friday too   lol

It's closed Matt. THere are only three categories, which I didn't event. Open is open to anybody. You can find closed in a search but you see members. Secret is where no one can find the group thru a search. I think it's important to have a group folks can find, but obviously there are drawbacks. Would be nice to have a fourth category. I suppose with almost 500 members, it is going to be rather exhausting looking at members.

If you mark your photos and so on for friends only, that's going to help.

Yes, if facebook made another group where it was closed and searchable, but members hidden, that would be great.  I supposedly 'secret' trans group made it into my list of suggested groups because some of my trans friends are members.  I messaged the group administrator and he changed that, but members were visible and they were supposed to be secret.  I wouldn't want trans groups being suggested to my facebook friends, because I am not out to over half of them.  I am out as openly gay, however.

I suppose I could create an alter ego on FB and join; maybe someday I will.


Jay (the other Jay)

Quote from: sneakersjay on June 04, 2014, 10:58:42 AM
Yes, if facebook made another group where it was closed and searchable, but members hidden, that would be great.  I supposedly 'secret' trans group made it into my list of suggested groups because some of my trans friends are members.  I messaged the group administrator and he changed that, but members were visible and they were supposed to be secret.  I wouldn't want trans groups being suggested to my facebook friends, because I am not out to over half of them.  I am out as openly gay, however.

I suppose I could create an alter ego on FB and join; maybe someday I will.


Jay (the other Jay)

TBH, it's done quite a lot. People put up cartoon characters or whatever as their avatar and then participate as that avatar and name. THere are a couple guys on the list who's names are unpronounceable. I'd say it's worth it. Very good discussion and I've met about 10 or so guys IRL.

I agree they should make a different membership category, say searchable but no info on the membership.


--Jay (I think I might be the "other Jay" LOL)

I'm 44. I'm one of those folks who knew very early on (age 4) that I 'was supposed to have been born a boy'.

Socially transitioned long, long ago. Medically (T, surgery) at age 38.

Hey everyone! I'm turning 36 in two months and have just begun figuring things out for myself. I honestly had no idea that FTM even existed because I had never heard about it until recently and I felt that I was just weird. Never feeling like a woman yet I wasn't born male. I clung onto being referred to as a tomboy as it was at least partial truth. I just never wanted to be remotely feminine at all. It didn't help that I have had a lot of pressure from my parents and others that made me recoil and not want to figure things out because I clearly would never be the person that they wanted me to be. Years really complicate things doesn't it? Lots of memories and attachments that make it challenging to take steps that you need to take. For me it is a struggle to sort through how I feel about myself and not knowing how to go about that and that's not even taking into account my teenage son. He'd be totally cool with whatever I end up doing and I've spoken with my mother recently and surprisingly she's cool with whatever I decide to do as is my husband who came out as MTF last year.

I didn't know FTMs existed either. When I saw Chaz, I thought he was kind of the exception who proved the rule or something.

--Jay

I used to compete in martial arts (as female). I was NEVER asked to take a blood test or any such thing. I'm sure there were women who competed who had very high natural T levels. They were large and very strong. I stopped sparring because it just hurt too much. Anyway, unless things have changed a LOT, because this was quite a number of years ago. (BTW, I think it's more of an issue for trans women anyway, because people don't understand the affect of estrogen.) It might be an issue if you were good enough to compete on a high level.


--Jay

My kids were cool with my transition, as in whatever!  LOL

I figured myself out and shortly afterwards was when Thomas Beatty was having his first child. That opened doors to talk about it.  I had never heard of trans men. I found some online, met a local guy in person and was like whoa! because it never occurred to me.  I knew I always felt male, but had no idea I could do anything about it. As soon as I realized I could transition and not just look like a hairy butch woman (not that there is anything wrong with them, they are just not ME), I jumped off that cliff and transitioned as soon as humanly possible.  In 9 months I got on T, had a hysto and top surgery and all my documents changed.

I had heard of trans people before but always MTF and never in a good light; they were freaks, perverts, deviants, etc and I knew I was none of those things.  I had to educate myself and obviously trans women are none of those things, either.  That and I remember clearly saying once, why would someone transition male to female and date women when they were already male and dated women??  And here I am, formerly in a female form dating men and now a man dating men.... funny how life works out sometimes!!

Quote from: sneakersjay on June 05, 2014, 02:57:49 PM
My kids were cool with my transition, as in whatever!  LOL

I figured myself out and shortly afterwards was when Thomas Beatty was having his first child. That opened doors to talk about it.  I had never heard of trans men. I found some online, met a local guy in person and was like whoa! because it never occurred to me.  I knew I always felt male, but had no idea I could do anything about it. As soon as I realized I could transition and not just look like a hairy butch woman (not that there is anything wrong with them, they are just not ME), I jumped off that cliff and transitioned as soon as humanly possible.  In 9 months I got on T, had a hysto and top surgery and all my documents changed.

I had heard of trans people before but always MTF and never in a good light; they were freaks, perverts, deviants, etc and I knew I was none of those things.  I had to educate myself and obviously trans women are none of those things, either.  That and I remember clearly saying once, why would someone transition male to female and date women when they were already male and dated women??  And here I am, formerly in a female form dating men and now a man dating men.... funny how life works out sometimes!!

It gets confusing or at least it does for me. My husband came out as MTF and BI and I find myself questioning a lot of things not only about our relationship but also coming to grips with the fact that I fall somewhere towards FTM and uncertain about how far I want to go to be comfortable with myself. If it isn't confusing enough I am attracted primarily to men. Life is very mysterious and seems to love curve balls but at least I have an understanding partner and we're just trying to figure out how our relationship evolves.

Ah. Found the FB group. Requested an add.

Quote from: MacG on June 06, 2014, 12:23:20 AM
Ah. Found the FB group. Requested an add.

I believe you were.

--Jay

I'm to the age now that when people ask me how old I am, I reply, "Mind your manners!"

If the FB group is for guys only, that leaves me out.  But I would be interested in talking to older guys.  I like to compare experiences and learn from other people.  I talk to a lot of girls, of course, but I'm always interested in seeing what things are like on the other side of the equation.  So if any of you guys are interested in talking to a girl who's, well, not young, but still full of life, I'd love to hear from you.  I'm new on this forum, but I suppose I can be PM'd.

Best wishes to all,
Foxglove

I turned 60 this year. Seems like more than a lifetime ago that I transitioned. I knew at age three.
Try telling your folks in the '50's! Would've loved to see an ep of "Leave it to Beaver" covering this.

Quote from: Foxglove on June 07, 2014, 03:02:16 PM
I'm to the age now that when people ask me how old I am, I reply, "Mind your manners!"

If the FB group is for guys only, that leaves me out.  But I would be interested in talking to older guys.  I like to compare experiences and learn from other people.  I talk to a lot of girls, of course, but I'm always interested in seeing what things are like on the other side of the equation.  So if any of you guys are interested in talking to a girl who's, well, not young, but still full of life, I'd love to hear from you.  I'm new on this forum, but I suppose I can be PM'd.

Best wishes to all,
Foxglove

I like seeing others' perspective, too. Keep posting!

Hi everyone,

I'm new to Susans and glad to see over 40's here.  I'm glad I found this thread.  I'm over 40 but I'm still figuring out what I want and need.

I don't know if I want to transition but I definitely do not feel female. The more I discover my authentic self the more uncomfortable I feel in women's clothes. The biggest thing for me at the moment is that I've been with my SO for 10 years and my SO is a lesbian, as I thought I was.  She is not attracted at all to males so if I transitioned it would mean the end of our relationship so I want to figure out what I want and what feels right for me.

Chance

Hi Foxglove,

I'm always interested about "the otherside" too so keep posting. I think we can all learn from each other.