Anyone else find themselves avoiding making new friends or acquaintances because they fear eventually having to come out to them?

I am on the precipice of the big jump into transition and what I fear most is coming out to people. My wife and I are in a neighborhood where lots of the children are the same age as our children and as we are integrating into school and community, we find ourselves spending a lot of time with the parents in the neighborhood, who by and large are great people of very similar backgrounds to ours. Some of them we really enjoy being around. The problem is that I find myself wanting to distance myself more and more to protect myself with what I feel will be my eventually coming out. I don't want to isolate my kids from others and I know that even though it might be more awkward when the day comes, there is the possibility that it will be harder for our neighbors to shun me or my family if I have a personal connection with them.

Did anyone else experience this?

Quote from: abbyFlame on June 13, 2014, 02:08:17 PM
Anyone else find themselves avoiding making new friends or acquaintances because they fear eventually having to come out to them?

I am on the precipice of the big jump into transition and what I fear most is coming out to people. My wife and I are in a neighborhood where lots of the children are the same age as our children and as we are integrating into school and community, we find ourselves spending a lot of time with the parents in the neighborhood, who by and large are great people of very similar backgrounds to ours. Some of them we really enjoy being around. The problem is that I find myself wanting to distance myself more and more to protect myself with what I feel will be my eventually coming out. I don't want to isolate my kids from others and I know that even though it might be more awkward when the day comes, there is the possibility that it will be harder for our neighbors to shun me or my family if I have a personal connection with them.

Did anyone else experience this?

Well, its not for the same reasons as you, but I tend not to distance myself from others and making friends but rather not let too many people get too close to me. Why? I really don't know other than I want to remain like a mysterious sort. Yeah I have friends some of whom are really close and I am definately a friendly sort but just meeting people and forming close friendships, not really my style. Socializing with people is fine but really I don't want to be invited into their homes for Sunday dinners or dinner parties.

for me, its if they find out thats on them, its the other stuff i rather keep guarded and getting to close to me, it'll become clearly obvious

No not off fear to come out,but lack of trust.Had to many backstabbing and been around to many "friends" who proved to be enemies,douchebags or worse !

I tend to keep to myself mostly for protection I have been stabbed in the back before by so called friends so I would rather keep to myself rather than put myself in the fireing line again.

On the other hand I have to do as little social stuff as possible at my daughters school so that she can have friends and all the benefits that come with that, I don't want to push a life of loneliness onto her as well that wouldn't be fair on her.