I was at church yesterday and people were talking about me literally behind my back. I'm still in the more andro-phase, so I can get some of the confusion. Also I'm deaf and have hearing aids, which maybe why people think it is ok to talk about me when I'm right next to them. This isn't the first time and probably not the last that people do stuff like that.

Do you non-deaf people get this behavior? I have always walked away trying to force my anger down, but days like yesterday I was not ready to deal with that stuff and was close to calling them on their comments. Any coping methods? because I don't now how to respond to people talking about me without wanting to pummel them.

People always talk behind each other's backs. 'Twas ever thus....

I suppose that our rarity as a group in society makes us particularly good targets for gossip. I am sure that people gossip about me too but I do not give it a second thought. However, if they were rude enough to do it in front of me I would probably ask to join their conversation since they were talking about me....

QuoteAny coping methods? because I don't now how to respond to people talking about me without wanting to pummel them.

Walk away from them until you cannot hear them. Do not waste your energy on this stuff unless it is maliciously wrong (slander).


Edited to remove waffle...

People will always talk behind your back. And sometimes loud enough that you are supposed to hear them. The way I deal with it is "Oh well". I have to live my life, not them and there is usually something about them that I could make fun of or critisize or whatever but be the bigger person and let 'em. Eventually things like that come back and bite them in thier own butts. Usually when people do things like this they are self concious about themselves and this is a way to stroke thier egos to feel better about themselves.

Hmmmmm depends on the people and the context of what is being said behind your back.

Most often I find that a knowing look and smile is enough to stop most negativity towards me. After all, most folk are socially programmed to smile back, which does two things.

• Makes them feel better and happier in the scenario, and removes the stigma of the situation
• Forces them to close their mouth or stop talking in one way or another

Everybody wins ^^

Worst case scenario I will attempt to engage the culprits for some light humorous banter. Most people are perfectly nice when you get to know them, or at least break the ice. Some just react strangely to unusual sights or experiences, which unfortunately we can be sometimes >.>

Well, I use others' awareness of my hearing impairment to gather some intelligence about what's going on around me... and I store that info for deployment at the appropriate time.

For example: I was once wearing an orange turtle-neck sweater, and one of my colleagues (who thought I couldn't hear them) started snarking about me to another colleague, remarking that I looked like "Thelma from Scooby-Doo".

So I waited until a little later in the day when I had to correct them on some of their work, and then I added in: "Oh, by the way... it's Velma from Scooby-Doo."

Let's just say, the gossip certainly dried up pretty darn sharpish at that point. 

Quote from: FTMDiaries on June 16, 2014, 08:58:04 AM
Well, I use other's awareness of my hearing impairment to gather some intelligence about what's going on around me... and I store that info for deployment at the appropriate time.

For example: I was once wearing an orange turtle-neck sweater, and one of my colleagues (who thought I couldn't hear them) started snarking about me to another colleague, remarking that I looked like "Thelma from Scooby-Doo".

So I waited until a little later in the day when I had to correct them on some of their work, and then I added in: "Oh, by the way... it's Velma from Scooby-Doo."

Let's just say, the gossip certainly dried up pretty darn sharpish at that point. 

I like your style

Finely prepared, and meticulously chilled revenge, with a slice of cattiness on the side. Delicious.

Quote from: Danniella on June 16, 2014, 09:02:41 AM
I like your style

Finely prepared, and meticulously chilled revenge, with a slice of cattiness on the side. Delicious.

Thanks.

My Mum always said that revenge is a dish best served cold. I agree with her completely.