I've delayed it about as long as I can; my GP is insisting on me having a physical and gyn exam. I am *not* mentally ready to deal with that - I still struggle with any touch of my vulva, including my own.

Any suggestions for coping strategies?

My wife will be attending with me.

I had mine around the 6 month mark by my GP

My husband was there for support. Not knowing what's going to happen I think is the hardest part.

I kept thinking its just a exam to make sure everything is healing OK. Was done in less then a minute.

Make your fears known to the doctor and they should help you also relax.

Isabell

All of my life, I have had skin problems where I cringed in terror at the thought of being touched and examined, and have learned to "give my body away" when that sort of thing needed to be done.  It is not my body, but a clinical object for the doctor, it is not the "me" that has emotions and feelings, I can feel the nerve sensations, but they belong to part of a body that does not reflect my spirit, and not what could be an invasion of my other senses.  Allow yourself to "give away" what you are uncomfortable with, in fact, say it, maybe aloud, and believe you have done so. 

I have had two exams by a gynecologist, the first time I was in enough pain and discomfort from a post op infection that it was "any port in a storm" as far as how to get over it. The infection was making my dilating pretty terrible, but I could barely feel the speculum being inserted, and the fact I was draped, just put me in "another world".  The second exam was a follow-up to check on my healing, and I simply felt so much better by then that it was as if I had been doing this all my life. 

My first suggestion is to be absolutely certain there IS a good reason for this exam, as you apparently have a history of being bullied into things by medical professionals. After the first couple months post-op, it doesn't seem necessary...

Secondly, if it's a quick check of healing, I had that done and it took about a minute.

Thirdly, you could look into sedatives; it's not uncommon to prescribe them to patients who will be too anxious to tolerate (or cooperate with) a given procedure.

I will definitely ask if it's necessary; I'm more than a year past SRS, but have had no exams since I left Montreal at the end of the recovery period following SRS.

I definitely have a history of that, and part of my discomfort with genital exams comes from my first endocrinologist - she required regular orchidometer exams as a condition of prescribing HRT.

Quote from: Agent_J on June 20, 2014, 01:15:57 PM

I definitely have a history of that, and part of my discomfort with genital exams comes from my first endocrinologist - she required regular orchidometer exams as a condition of prescribing HRT.

Talking about quacks, but ha seems to not be getting much better. GRRRR.....

Just try your best.

Hugs
Isabell

Definitely ask if it's necessary. I never had one surgery almost 8 years ago.

Quote from: Agent_J on June 20, 2014, 01:15:57 PM
I will definitely ask if it's necessary; I'm more than a year past SRS, but have had no exams since I left Montreal at the end of the recovery period following SRS.

I definitely have a history of that, and part of my discomfort with genital exams comes from my first endocrinologist - she required regular orchidometer exams as a condition of prescribing HRT.

If it had been a male doctor giving comparable exams to a female patient he would have been charged with sexual misconduct.

Its worth getting checked out even if everything feels ok its no worse than dilating except some one else is doing it.

xxx

I don't have much of a comfort level with dilation.

Quote from: Agent_J on June 20, 2014, 05:48:49 PM
I don't have much of a comfort level with dilation.

oh dont worry you will be fine

xx

Be fine with...?

13 months on dilation is still difficult for me.

I actually went last week to a my first gynecologist appointment, I was nervous before going, i went on my own. I sat in the waiting room nervously paging through a magazine.. there was one couple there as well, a young husband and wife.. she was a few months pregnant. then it was my turn..

I was not that bad, my gynecologist is a lady and she immediately put me at ease, excellent bedside manner... she knew my history as I was refereed to her and she  said welcome to womanhood. The exam was quick, she was very happy with my healing process, no infections.. She also did a breast exam to check for lumps, i was clean.. She told me i should still come at least once a year like a g-girl as i am can still get infections.

I know and am very comfortable with this doctor; she has been my GP for years. I'm just very uncomfortable with anyone performing such an exam (hell, I struggled with the ones when I was at the recovery residence!)