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my mom wants me to cut my hair!

Started by Umiko, June 27, 2014, 10:29:44 PM

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Umiko

i cant believe this BS. i told her countless times i was growing out my hair, and she left me alone. now she is adamant on me getting my hair cut. i swear if my hair is cut, its over, i wouldnt survive in time. its the one thing thats keeping me together right now. i took me 3 months to get the 2 inches i have.
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Carrie Liz

Definitely fight for it.

Hair takes a LONG time to grow. I've been at it for 18 months and it's still not even close to being long enough.

Is it because she doesn't know? Or is it because she's suddenly realizing "OMG this is real" and pushing back?
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Umiko

Quote from: Carrie Liz on June 27, 2014, 10:32:03 PM
Definitely fight for it.

Hair takes a LONG time to grow. I've been at it for 18 months and it's still not even close to being long enough.

Is it because she doesn't know? Or is it because she's suddenly realizing "OMG this is real" and pushing back?
she knows and is fighting me. i keep putting my foot down. before in the past i didnt maintain my hair but now i'm serious and she sees that. is it because its the summer. i mean like wtf. why cant she just take no for an answer and stop bugging me about it. its freaking frustrating
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AnneB

Unless there is a real threat of moving you out, cutting you off from everything, I would firmly, but politely/respectfully say "While I understand and respect your concerns (whether you actually do or not), I will not comply with your request, that is all I will say on the subject".  You have told her you understand her request, but like a parent says, "I will not discuss this anymore."  means "that's final".
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Umiko

idk what the dealo is though. is it because i play with my hair to much? is it the summer time? is it because she is scared that i'm super serious? idk. i've told her over and over and over and over again to the point i became a broken record and its draining me. i swear, if i have to go in the barbershop other than to get my extensions put in, imma lose my mind
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Emily1996

I will just not play with your hair, just leave them alone, I always straightened my hair and stuff, and I had longer hair before, but y mom forced me to cut them and now I feel horrible, so just don't let her, but if she keeps insisting, you should be like it doesn't matter to you (even though it does), so just try to keep them guyish looking even if you aren't gonna cut them... I htink she will stop pressing you if she doesn't see them as threat anymore... I think that she doesn't support you like mine so yeah... Just don't cut them, and think it's gonna be ok because it won't... I know :( now the only thing I have that reminds me of the real me are my nails, and my sister keeps bugging me about them too, damn em
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AnneB

Be the parent, say "the subject, is closed"
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awilliams1701

I grew mine out when I was 16 my mom since then(including recently in the past year) has told me many times its a phase and that I would grow out of it. I'm 32 and the closest I've ever came is wondering if it was worth dealing with the looks I get from people, but concluded cutting it would be the same as hiding myself.

I talked to her 2 weeks ago and she's in denial about the whole trans issue. She kept talking about how I would change my mind after therapy. She'll come around eventually. Fortunately while my dad doesn't get it, and I told him neither do I, he's much more accepting of it.

Unfortunately I had to cut a lot of it off just before I found out I was trans. I think I melted it in the grill or something. It was extremely tangled out of no where. It had been getting bad since it hadn't been cut at all in a long time, but this happened suddenly. Fortunately its still long... for a guy.
Ashley
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Kova V

So when I was in 8th grade I ended up growing my hair out. I cut it a few years after college and really wish I didn't but you just need to hold your ground. Parents are only human and eventually they will give up. Be ware of sibblings though. My older brother grabbed my pony tail once and jokingly held a scissor to it. I jokingly kicked him in the nuts. in my opinion the hardest part about growing out hair is when it get eye level it always gets in your eyes, when it gets mouth level it always gets in your mouth. It can drive you mad when your not use to it. It will be fine though. Get the split ends trimmed every 6 months and it will grow faster too, just be sure to go to the salon yourself and pay for the haircut yourself. Early on I found that if you don't, they may just cut it how your mom wants. I got up mid cut and walked out. Live and learn I guess.

You can defiantly hold out :)
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Umiko

i think finally my mother gave up. she asked me if i was getting dreads and i said yes, end of story. i'm sure she'd question me growing my hair out again but for now, i stomped the question. god how i wish i could just move but i'm stuck here until after college
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AnneB

like I was saying, you be the parent for a change, say, "I'm sorry, but the subject is closed', or just refuse to answer her anymore about it.  You should still be respectful tho.  No yelling/hollering/screaming.   Be a grown-up.
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Umiko

Quote from: Paula Christine on June 28, 2014, 12:10:07 AM
like I was saying, you be the parent for a change, say, "I'm sorry, but the subject is closed', or just refuse to answer her anymore about it.  You should still be respectful tho.  No yelling/hollering/screaming.   Be a grown-up.
lol. my mother is stubborn but i do say respectful i will not cut my hair. she knows why i'm not cutting my hair, she's just trying to test me and i'm putting my foot down.
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K Style Addiction

Congratulations, i'm glad to hear your mom's getting the message *hugs*.
All I can say is that my life is pretty plain, I like watchin' the puddles gather rain.

Despite all my rage, I'm still just a rat in a cage
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